Betrayal = independent actions and decisions exclusive of a partner

United States
December 22, 2008 6:49pm CST
Have you ever been betrayed? Have you been oppressed by your partner not even aware that they acted selfishly? Is your relationship a partnership where two people communicate and give to each other? Is it wrong to expect your partner to bring everything they can into your relationship?
3 people like this
4 responses
• Philippines
23 Dec 08
i had been betrayed so many times already in a relationship and the hardest one was i didn't know i was competing with my own sister..right now i think my relationship has nothing to do with partnership..this relationship is totally one sided and selfish..its wrong to expect so much from a partner..expectations controls a relationship to grow because every expectations that is didn't come true leads to disappointment that leads to arguments and pin pointing which make things worst..i think in a relationship we should be thankful of what our partners can give and the more that we don't expect nor demand is the more is likely being given and received..appreciation is a must
• United States
23 Dec 08
Giving, trust, and appreciation are all qualities that define a good relationship because with these you know there is going to be communication. Take away any of the four and you will not have a relationship, it will be all power and control. We really need to set ourselves free from slavery. Peace to you and Blessings, Sorry to hear about your competing with your sister, that is not cool and is certainly a violation against you. I wish you well and hope that you can overcome the trials that you have faced, will face and continue to face... Yes the past and the future will bring you to the present and I hope it is good for you... :) Happy Holidays, Sincerely, Gary
• Philippines
23 Dec 08
i hope for those wishes to come true Gary..many thanks..in every single day i battle with life i learned what is must and what is not..i somehow thank this trials that had come because it made me a better person.. and to you, i wish you a happy holidays..may all your wishes come true and all the goodness in your heart be rewarded with a wonderful life ahead.. merry Christmas.. yours, Diselle
@LittleMel (14059)
• Canada
28 Dec 08
yes I can say my relationship is one where we communicate. I used to keep things for myself and only blurt it all out when I can't stand it anymore. But hubby is a very communicative person always encourages me to say what I think or feel. Sometimes I didn't do it right, sometimes it's language barrier, but every year I get better at it. A lot of misunderstandings we had in our first years of marriage are dissolved now. See we came from different country, culture and upbringing. I only met him online we have never even met in person before we got married. I just knew he is the right one for me, I don't know how. But until now I never regret that decision. We have our flaws but all I am asking from him is that he would give the best to us and our relationship because this is what I do. He does, and so I will keep doing the same. Among all the people I came to know, I am glad to say I know about 4 or 5 are true friends including my hubby. My life won't be the same without these people and I would go the extra miles to make sure they feel the same. All the bad things others do to me are meaningless, I won't let them change me. Why do people do bad things to others, thinking the Creator is blind, well time and time again they will learn a lesson. I know I won't be able to forgive if I was betrayed or lied to. I hope you will find the right one for you.
• United States
28 Dec 08
Thank You, This is a difficult topic the subject is deep and crosses certain lines that I would not have crossed if I had not been betrayed in the first place. Thank You for accepting me as I am... :) Peace and Blessings to you and yours and have a Happy New Year all the way through... Sincerely, Gary
@nannacroc (4049)
23 Dec 08
I have been married for over 30 years and it has not been a bed of roses but we have always loved and supported each other. I make jokes about our relationship saying things like, 'it's a love/hate relationship, he loves me, I hate him.' Also that there's give and take, he gives, I take. Neither of these are true. We have weathered our problems because we have respect and love for each other. Bothe sets of parents had long and happy marriages and we wwere both supported by them when we first got married. Both of us were told that marriage would never be easy but love and understanding both ways would keep us together. It is never unreasonable to expect any partnershp to work both ways but my father told me that he did not like people who said they'd been married for years and never had a cross word, he felt that meant one partner was doing all the giving.
• United States
23 Dec 08
I'm at the point I won't have a cross word either, and I don't expect that I will have cross words in my relationship with whom ever and when ever I have another relationship. As we get older we realize that life is too short to be angry with other people if there is no Love and no respect then there is no relationship because with out Love and respect you can't have trust and good communication and those are the four key parts to a good foundation for any relationship and certainly both people involved and in love have to give to the relationship for the relationship to work. Anything less would be a betrayal to your partner. I think we agree, :) Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and Thank You, Sincerely, Gary
1 person likes this
@addysmum (1225)
• Canada
23 Dec 08
My husband and I came close to separating when he didn't see how he was treating me. It wasn't until I told him I was leaving that he realized just what I was going through. Now we have an agreement, we give everything to making this marriage work and I mean everything. We have the children to think about so our fullest effort has to be made to ensure a healthy home for them and if we can't do that together then we have to find a way of doing it apart.
• United States
23 Dec 08
I would hope that if you ever parted you would give your husband the credit for making things better after that first incident. I hope tensions never rise to that level for the two of you again. I certainly hope that you two are able to remain friends if you ever came to the point of having to part and that you would always communicate with your husband. If you remain in communication, my bets would be that you would never have to part. A lack of communication has cause a lot of problems for me and my relationship with the one that used to be my wife.