Do you let your friends borrow money from you?

United States
December 27, 2008 8:07pm CST
Through thick and thin we have to be there for our friends and I did. My friend borrowed money from me and told me that she badly need it and I did. She promised to pay me this December but when I ask her back my money she told me that I owe her some money. I couldn't even believe what I heard. Do you think friendship and money are not good company?
2 people like this
12 responses
• United States
29 Dec 08
If I had money this might be a real discussion As it stands, I buy things for my friends and know, eventually, they will buy something for me. If I had money to loan out, it would depend on the friend and how much they needed. I'd give my best friend the moon and she wouldn't have to give me anything in return. My Little Sisters in my sorority, absolutely, no questions asked. But then there are other people who aren't getting more than $20 or so because I'm never going to see it again.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Dec 08
Life is a wonder with friends who make you laugh and cry. They will sure be there for you through thick and thin but most of them leave you on the verge of bankcrupcy. I will not leave a friend in need because in return I don't want people to run away from them when I am going to need them. Yes, it is best that you will be able to see who can get more or less and not expect that it will be returned to you that way your heart wont ache.
1 person likes this
@808nala (640)
• United States
28 Dec 08
Your situation is familiar to me. I used to let my friends borrow money, but more than half was never returned. I've learned to only lend money to my really good friends. If they return money, that's great. If they don't, then their friendship is more important to me than the money. Of course it depends what the money is for. If they really need it, I'll give it to them, but if it's for something stupid, then I would have to think about giving it to them. I will expect the money back if it's for something dumb though. Also, I only give if it's totally extra money that I don't need. I don't give money that I will need later because I never know if I'll get it back for sure.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Dec 08
Yes, as friends we easily get connected with people and being branded as good they will always try us if we really are the so called good friends. When friends borrow money it is really hard to say no. I didn't feel good when my husband told me that every time my friends borrow from us they no one ever care to return it, not even a frined or family. Friends are so nice when they can see that they can borrow or get something from us some of them if not most go away when we are already worth nothing. Friendship is important to me but some people should not abuse it because I am really good to people whom I value and I call friends. I am still hoping that she will pay me back, there is no harm in trying to hope for things possible in sight.;-)
2 people like this
@katrhina23 (1282)
• United States
28 Dec 08
usually i will just give her money so i wont feel bad if she wouldnt pay. atleast i gave her the money and wouldnt be expecting her to pay me back. i feel bad if a person promises to pay me at a certain day and time and wouldnt do so. the person even if she is my bestfriend cant borrow anymore if she didnt pay me the first time.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Dec 08
Yes, I also really felt bad when she promised me that she is going to pay me this month only to know that she will tell me that I am now the one who owes her. It made more confused. She is the kind of person who is very good with counting every cent she has and if I owe her something for sure she would asked it back as I have experienced that with her. I would never also let her borrow from me anymore if she will not pay me back. I still hope she will because I badly need the money. I was actually going to help somebody else but it's sad that I can't as of now.
1 person likes this
@ibanag22 (36)
• Philippines
25 Feb 09
Well i cant really say tht it's a bad company after all it depends on the situation. why not try to understand ur friend? Maybe she's just buying time so tht she can pay u bck...... try talking to her if not well maybe ur not really tht close......... or maybe not
@my125125 (822)
• Malaysia
21 Feb 09
Hi Hibiscus, I do lend money to a friend, but she promise to give it back by little and little after she got her job, but untill now nothings come back. So now I have learn a thing call, when you lend your money to someone else, don't expect the money back to you, but if your friend return the money to you would be the best.
@annierose (18023)
• Philippines
21 Feb 09
hi hibiscus_mel, I agree with you that friends should be there to help one another. True friends are just like sister and brother to one another.Whenever my friend needed money, I not hesitate to lend him or her some, especially if I know have something to lend for him or her. I trust my friends and I know that if they say that they will return it back, they will keep their promise. That is what I am doing also with them. Whenever I need some money, I promise to give it back to them on the date I told them I will give it. And sometimes I am returning the money I borrowed even earlier on the date I mentioned to them. It is good that friends are true not only on their words but on their actions as well. So far, I am not yet experiencing having conflicts with my friends regarding money matters. We have a saying that "Birds of the same feathers, flocks together". As much as possible I do not ask for money from my friends. As much as I can get money without asking them, I keep on finding ways. For example, instead of asking money from them, I look for work so I don't need to have a debt with someone. Majority of my friends have that attitude also. So, I guess, that is why I am not encountering any problems with them regarding money.However, I have also this experienced in which one friend borrowed a money from me and then never return it back from me. She not even explain to me why she is not paying me. And worst, it seems as if, she already forgot our friendship.I am not angry with what she did. I am just trying to understand her. The sad part is that, we are no longer that close unlike before, just because of money.
@modstar (9612)
• Philippines
21 Feb 09
True friendship, no matter how much money is involved, it won't be affected. My friends do borrow money from me but they're just changes. I don't charge them anymore because they do the same to me. As much as i want to lend them large sum of money, i don't have them so i can't. Me and my friends need money because we group of poor boys.
@elghrasya (502)
• Philippines
21 Feb 09
I often borrow some money from my friends but I do not let my friends borrow to me. I dont know why? Maybe I just don't trust easily in that kind of matter. And besides they have much money rather than me so why would they borrow? haha
@tehilla (44)
• Nigeria
21 Feb 09
we should be able to come to the rescue of our friends in times of need. you should not be too bothered if they don't pay you back, but you should be happy you were able to assist a friend in need.
• China
21 Feb 09
It depends the relationship between you and your friend and the characters of your friend,I think.I am sure I will borrow money to my best friends,and I will borrow money to some other friends by letting her/him write a receipt for the loan,and I will not borrow any to the so-called friend.
• India
21 Feb 09
friendship means sharing but borrowing. But certain things in life like money acts as tsunami in destructing the relationship.
@clorissa123 (4930)
• United States
20 Feb 09
I guess you are right. Friendship and money never mix up. I did let someone borrow my money, but she never pay me back. So, I have learned smarter now. Whoever want to borrow money from me, I would say, I am poor, no money, sorry.