Frustration: Can you control yourself?

@deserve40 (1642)
India
December 29, 2008 7:04am CST
We have to face failures many a times in the life. When we fail to achieve our goals, sometimes we get frustrated. It is important to control your thought process and your actions when you are under frustrated. If we lose our control on mind, we may act in a manner for which we may have to repent in future. Are you able to control your mind when you are frustrated? What do you do to control your mind when you are frustrated. What should be done ideally in such situation? Please share your views.
1 person likes this
13 responses
• India
30 Dec 08
Yup I can control my frustration.. Remain silent when ever you get frustrated.. It will surely help you.. But remaining silent during frustrations is highly impossible but it is possible by practice.. try up dude..
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
If we try to remain silent when we are frustrated, then it is possible to remain silent. However, as rightly stated by you, it is not easy so constant and honest efforts are required. There are other means like telling friends about it, putting your frustration on the paper and then burn it but in all the case one has to try honestly because here one has to win over one's own self.
• India
30 Dec 08
According to me nothing is gonna happen by informing it to friend or writing it in a paper.. If that's your motive then can I know what is the use of doing these?? will your frustration disappear from you?? this is not an argument am asking you suggestion..
@jesbellaine (4157)
• Philippines
30 Dec 08
Hello there! Yes, when I am frustrated, I can control my mind to not burst into madness. I know it was hard to control your feelings when y ou are frustrated but I did anyway... but there are times that it got out of hand... lolz... When I am so frustrated, I try to be away from the situation for few minutes to think and have time alone for myself then when I am calm.. I go back.. as much as possible, i don't want to hurt others just because i am so frustrated... :) Happy New Year! And Happy Mylotting! Cheers!
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
So you withdraw yourself from the situation or the spot of trouble and return back after. This is a nice way to control your mind when you are frustrated. However the only problem with this method is that some situation require your constant presence and some even require quick solution. In situation you cannot afford to move away. However, such situations are very few. Thank for the response. Have a nice time.
• China
30 Dec 08
when something make me feel frustrated,i usually share my feeling with one of my best friends or my ferience,sometimes i could listen to the music or watch TV to relax. when we feel frustrated ,the most improtant point is to solve it or to forget it.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Thanks for the response. Have a nice time.
@srijshm (1165)
• India
30 Dec 08
I guess, one learns to deal with this with experience. I used to get frustrated often at failures. The magnitude of failure decided how long i stayed frustrated. Luckily for me i was always surrounded by well meaning friends & relatives which helped me come out out of these bouts of frustration. With my experience of failures & success i have a few humble suggestions. 1) At times of failure be with good friends & don't hide facts. 2) develop a habit of habit of reading motivational books. I always remember a quote i read once " only you can frustrate yourself, circumstances do not have the power to change your thinking"3) Develop hobbies & indulge in them to relax yourself. ( posting in myLot can be a relaxing exercise too) 4) Create a pictorial dream book & look into it to re-motivate yourself. Happy new year.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Thanks for the response, you have suggested wonderful ways to control the frustration. I think that if we practice one or all of them, then we can learn to control our mind when we are frustrated. Re-motivating oneself is most important to get going. You have very rightly quoted that we can get frustrated only by ourselves and so the circumstances do not have control on our minds if we train our minds properly.
@LittleMel (14055)
• Canada
30 Dec 08
I have learnt from past mistakes that keeping cool is important that way I use my head not my heart or feelings When frustrated I usually withdraw myself and take a break to give me time to assess the situation when I come up with an answer then I'll return I'm still learning it. Some things take time, some things I know how to deal with them already.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
That is right way to control your frustration and to keep cool. However, all the times it may not be possible to withdraw yourself from that situation or from that spot. In this case the problem becomes even more serious. You are right, somethings take time and so we have to keep trying. Thanks for the response.
• Singapore
30 Dec 08
Talk bout this wll it's all in the emotion, when times like having a financial crisis. You tends to have more of this to come........
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Thanks for the response friend. Have a nice time.
@Mtn13Bkr (28)
• United States
30 Dec 08
It depends on the situation if it is something that I am really frustrated about, than I hit something soft like a pillow or throw something, I know this is bad, but sometimes I cant help it, after that I think about for quite awhile and get over it and try harder. For smaller stuff, I just think about it or talk to somebody about it.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Oh No.... it is not good habit my friend. Hitting something out of frustration may cause you some trouble. So please try to control your mind at that time. One good thing is that you know that it is bad habit, because to change yourself or to change some of your habits, you need to accept the fact that you are not doing the right thing. So you have taken the first step in controling your mind. Try little harder to control your mind and try honestly. You will be able to do it...
• Nepal
29 Dec 08
yes, it's easy to say control you situation when get frustration.Whoever can overcome from his/her frustation,he is more good than normal person (who is never frustrated before). Good thing is accept the situation,achieve a goal isn't easy task.Only few can come to it. "Consistency is one of the ways to overcome frustration"
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Yes, it is not easy to overcome the frustration. However, one should try to learn to come out of frustration and control one's mind. If one can control one's own mind under frustration, then one is a winner. It is difficult to maintain consistency in our performance under frustration.
• Malaysia
29 Dec 08
Yes, most of the time but definitely not all the time. The first thing I'll think of doing is to take a nice bath (if possible) as it gives me some a refreshed feeling so that I can think of starting off again, it also cools me down so that my mind can have more rationality without being clouded by the failure. Second thing I'll do is to talk or write to my close friends. I believe it is important to have someone give you support at times of failure and frustration and my friends always do a good job to bring me back. Frustration has to go somewhere, either into the bathtub or on papers or in a good conversation. I believe the ideal way is to stay open, don't close yourself and let the failure dwell and grow within you. Dump it some where, ASAP, and start off anew.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
So you suggest that we have to give out the frustration somewhere. You have good friends whom you can tell about your frustration and that is good thing. Good friends who motivate you during your bad times prove to be asset in the social and personal life. Putting your frustration on the paper is another way. But I believe that friends could be the best people to tell about frustration and get relaxed.
@arthi_88 (1518)
• India
29 Dec 08
Sometimes I can control..and when I can't i pour out everything to my Mom or my cousin elder brother...It magically relaxes my mind...Sometimes playing chess with my younger brother also takes my mind of the problem and tension and helps me to think logically... Have a nice day!
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
30 Dec 08
Well Arthi, telling about your frustration to some very own person is one of the ways to get rid of the frustration. You are fortunate enough to have people around you who can listen to your problems and atleast encourage you to fight against odds. It really works a lot and you feel a lot relaxed by this. However, the problem with the people working away from their homes and even in the western countries is that such people may not be found easily and so there is nobody around you to listen patiently about your problems. But fortunately in India and even in western countries some families do have tradition of living together especially in tough times.
@WebMann (4732)
• Canada
29 Dec 08
I had a heart attack in 2004 that was in-operable and I then had to deal with the fact that my life would never be the same. The hardest part of this whole thing is how it has affected my mind. When anything goes wrong I can go from having some energy and high in spirit to zero energy and then I can easily slip into a depression. I do bite my tongue though because I know that once spoken hurtful words can never be taken back. My grand father had the same heart problems I have now and the same thing happened to him but he never learned to control his tongue and it plagued him to his dying day. Jimmy Buffet sings a song. I think it's called Breathe In, Breath Out, Move On and it's so true. If something happens that is frustrating it may be wise to get away from that situation if at all possible.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
29 Dec 08
Very true friend, it is very important to control our mind and actions especially words when we are under depression. During such times, we become too much negative and sometimes out of frustration, use a language which we would have never used otherwise. You have suggested that if it is possible, we must try to get away from the situation. That is good way because when you are away from that situation, your mind gets diverted and that helps us to relax a bit.
@har360 (95)
• Indonesia
29 Dec 08
When we have frustrated for some problems, is need a time to can controlling our emotion, when time goes by, we can look back, what the wrong action that we make, and fix it, so if you have the same situation again, you know how to solve that problems, and like a say previously, it's take a time. After the process we can be more wisely to facing such of problems or may be the harder one. Don't be giving up, kept positive mind.
@deserve40 (1642)
• India
29 Dec 08
So you depend on the experience and try to learn from the experience. It is good thing but the only problem I feel is that for getting experience we do lose quite big things. So everytime we cannot afford to learn from our own experiences only. Sometimes, we have to rely on other's experience. One more thing I feel like agreeing with you is that one should not give up and keep trying.
• India
30 Dec 08
yes,frustration is a paart of daily life and i easily get frustrated but then as easily i deal with it as well. Whenever i feel frustrated, i just leave everything and i do things i like the most. Whenever i feel sad because of frustration, i listen to loud punk rock music, i talk to my best friend who makes me laugh like anything, i watch my favourite tv shows, i like hanna montanna alot, at times it acts as a key for my smile. I know how to cheer up myself and i do things i enjot keeping all the frustration aside. And after sometime i feel so happy and relaxed. Good Day n Keep Smiling..:-))