I Need Some Advice....

United States
January 7, 2009 12:57pm CST
Ive been living in Arizona for close to a year now. I moved here thinking that my boyfriend would soon follow me. It was his plan for us to move to Arizona in the first place. I have a great job! I moved here into one of his friends homes. I was staying in the guest room until I wanted to get my own place. So that REALLY didn't work out and I had to get out of there before ca ca hit the fan. Which it did soon after I moved out. I moved into another friend of my boyfriends in June. This guy seemed decent. Seemed like he had his stuff together. 'Had' a good job and seemed to really take care of his kids. So after I move in and pay a few bills he moves his gf in. This woman has no job....she has nothing but a pt cruiser full of her stuff. She was such a nice girl. They would never ever argue in front of me. But she would always mention things to me. And in a way I didn't believe her. So after his home gets forclosed. BTW this man just seperated from his wife in Feb. so I thought that maybe he just wanted to let go of the house to ruin her credit also. So we start looking for a house to rent. He always told me that he didn't want me to feel 'trapped'. I have plans to move up in my career. So I agreed to be on a lease of a 4 bedroom house for a year starting in August the rent is $975. I was gone most of the month of August and when I returned his gf was gone. The last week of Ocober this man moves another woman into this house with her 5 kids. He has 2 full time and 2 everyother weekend. I was like HELLO I LIVE HERE TOO! So I had to start sharing everything. This lady is a wonderful woman I kinda got used to having her around. I cut down the portion of rent I was giving him to $245 which is 1/4. When I gave him that amount for November he kinda was mad that I didn't give him more. So not even 2 weeks after this new gf moved in this place turned into a nightmare. Utilities were getting turned off. They would always be fighting. Everytime I'm on my cell phone this man seems to be right by my bedroom door. This is my house too, right? I feel so uncomfortable here....I hate coming home....I just hate staying here. So his gf moves out and takes all of her furniture which was like everything because he got rid of his stuff for her to move in. He calls her work and tells them they need to get her arrested. He files fake Police reports. BTW he has 2 assault charges he has to go to court for that his wife filed. He baths his 8yr old daughter every night. This place is just crazy. I need to get the hell out of here.....the thing is that I'm trapped by a Legal contract.....a lease! Has anyone been through something like this or can help me? I'm thinking on my day off Friday going to find a legal aid....I just don't want to get screwed paying 1/2 the rent after I have moved out. The lease is up at the end of July and that would be so much money id be giving him. He thinks he is too nice to these women and feels like he is being used. I think he is controlling and is paranoid and hates being alone.!!
2 responses
@Loverbear (4928)
• United States
7 Jan 09
A lease is a binding contract for BOTH parties! From the sound of the way things are, you should be able to get out of the lease for breech of contract. When you signed the lease, it was for two people living in the house. Suddenly it turned into seven, plus the family he has. Also, you are entitled to having utilities...are you paying for them too? Also, with paying rent you should be able to at least have some furniture in the house. The man sounds like a real problem. First he can't manage money...if he could, he wouldn't have lost the house to foreclosure. It affects his credit too! Secondly it seems like he has to have tons of people around... which feeds his need to control. I also would be extremely concerned because of the two assault charges!! You need to get your tail out of the situation, and make darned sure that the people at legal aid know about the living conditions and the entire situation. When you signed the lease you were under the impression that you would be having a quiet, stable environment that wouldn't have a revolving door for all the needful people on the face of the earth. You also are entitled to your privacy and he shouldn't be hovering around your door when you are on the telephone. His saying he didn't want you to feel trapped and what his actions are saying are two different things. You definitely need to get moved out of there and into a secure quiet environment. Especially when this person has had so many girlfriends and their children etc coming in and going out. You don't need to carry the financial load for them too! Pack up your stuff and get your tail out of there!
• United States
8 Jan 09
Thank You. Reading your response makes me feel like there is hope! My friends are letting me stay at there home when I need to.
@Loverbear (4928)
• United States
8 Jan 09
I'm glad that you have a place to go when things aren't going to well. I definitely would get out of the lease and out of the house! It seems like he is only interested in himself and also that you could be considered a built in baby sitter. You are getting your rights as a lessee stomped on! Also the environment isn't exactally a good one for any children. I am happy that my post was able to help. There is a great family unit here, so feel free to ask us for help and advice. We all at times need someone to listen and give us advice, and there are times that we need that person to be anonymous. Take care of you and get out of that horrible situation as quickly as you can!
• United States
7 Jan 09
Perhaps it is time for you to speak to the company or person who holds your lease, and explain to them clearly that you are afraid of this man. It is possible that they will let you out of your lease without much trouble at all. It sounds like you need to do something to change your situation, and cutting your losses might be the answer. If he is as unstable as you think he is, it is also a good idea to call child services and place an anonymous complaint. If things such as electricity are being cut off, his daughter is in danger as well. I wish you much luck in getting out and getting your own place. Stay away from the losers your boyfriend seems to have for friends.
• United States
8 Jan 09
I definitly have learned from my mistakes! Thank YOu!