Do you feel obligated to give a gift to someone who unexpectedly gave u a gift?
January 16, 2009 5:58am CST
Yeah, do you feel obligated? Like in an office, during Christmas season employees give gifts to each other especially if they are friends. They exchange gifts. But if for instance an employee who is not a friend of yours happens to give you a gift, would give her/him a gift too? Like my sister. She had gifts ready for her friends alone and they exchange gifts. But when she unexpectedly received from someone not within her circle of friends, she was obligated to buy the person a gift though she told me she don’t want to but has to cause its embarrassing and disappointing to the giver. Why? Would it be really bad not to give the person you unexpected that you’d receive a gift from? If you are in my sister’s shoe, would you give the person a gift? I know Christmas is giving and sharing. I just want to know your view on this situation. And if you are the giver, do you expect a gift in return?
16 Jan 09
It has happened frequently that I have received an unexpected gift from a colleague or a friend or even a person living in the same block of flats when I was not at all expecting it - not tomention the parcel I spoke of in a discussion a few days back!. I feel like I've received two gifts - one is the item itself and one is the fact that the person thought enough of me to give me the gift. When this has happened to me then I have not always returned the favour. It depends very much on the occasion or the person. I do not give gifts just because I receive them as it seems to be me that it could be interpreted as an afterthought. Then how do you decide on the give to give? Do you base it on the price of the gift you received? Do you stick to the same sort of item? I would wait in the case of yur sister until another occasion arrives, maybe even one when gifts are not expected, and give a surprise gift to the person concerned. I do not think that going immediately to find something to make up for the gift received would be a nice gesture. I give a gift if there is a reason and not neccessarily because it is Christmas or birthdays. If I see something I think would fit a certain person perfectly then even if there is not an occasion to give it I will do so just the same. I also received an unexpected gift which I will never forget. I use a local market stall where I buy fresh local cheese. Some time back the stall holder gave me a gift of a handmirror for my handbag with a note telling me that my smile always cheers him and his wife up and maybe I should get to see it a bit more too. That gift could in no way have been returned
16 Jan 09
Hi! I also think that my sister should have waited for the next occasion. Maybe a birthday or the soonest is Valentines' Day. If I am the giver, I would think that my sister have given me a gift just to repay or replace the gift I gave her. Besides, I myself don't think its an obligation. It was unexpected so not being ready to give something in return wouldn't make me a bad person. Keep posting!
16 Jan 09
hi there, iskayz.. i've received many unexpected gifts this Christmas and though i felt a little obligated to give back a gift, i just uttered a simple prayer of gratitude for all of them and thanked them graciously. there is, however, one gift-giver i'm kinda 'bothered' with because it appears that he has a 'special' motivation in giving me a gift, lol! happy myLotting!
• United States
16 Jan 09
I don't feel obligated to give a gift to someone who unexpectedly gave me a gift. The whole reason for giving a gift is to show someone you care for them. I give gifts all the time and I give gifts to people who didn't expect it. They will look at me and say I didn't get you anything. As I tell them I didn't get them a gift to receive one back. I bought it because I like you and I thought you would like what I got for you. One time where I worked it was getting close to Christmas and we would be closing for the day. I went out and bought a gift for a co-worker who had just recently started working. I gave it to her the day before we would be off of work the next day. When I handed her the gift she made the comment that she had not gotten me anything and as I mentioned to her that the reason I bought her a gift was I thought she would like it not because I wanted a gift in return.