My oldest son is off to IRAQ!!!!! I'm so worried

@mssnow (9484)
United States
January 16, 2009 11:35am CST
Yup, my oldest son is shipping out on Sunday. He will be in the warehouse on base and keeps telling me not to worry, But its a mothers right to worry. Isn't it??. Even though he will stay on base and not out fighting, things still happen on the bases. He tells me he could get hit by a car here. That is true but even so i still feel its more dangerous there. i told him when i was hugging him goodbye. "Danny DONT be a hero!!" I dont want a dead hero son. I would rather have him alive even if he is branded a coward. Does that seem selfish?? I just couldn't handle having my son hurt or killed. How would you react in my shoes?? Tell me how you feel about the war and everything and what you would do if your child had to go to Iraq.
6 people like this
20 responses
• Philippines
16 Jan 09
mssnow, definitely i will be as worried sick as you are if my son is leaving for iraq. moreso because, i would feel that he will be fighting somebody else's war. i am not american, mssnow, so i do not understand why the united states has not yet left iraq after all these years. all the while i thought that the u s forces will leave iraq soon after storming the place and capture that saddam hussein king of theirs. i may never be in the shoes of the american mothers but, i feel for all of you as i am a mother, too. i really hope that the u s forces will no longer be needed there so that the hearts of so many wives, mothers and children will no longer be broken by so much apprehension and fear when their love ones will leave to take part in the battlefield.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
16 Jan 09
Thank you for your kind words. I hate that we are still in a war that we shouldn't be in. I hope that Obama will somehow get us out of it. But till then I must be like amny other mothers who worry about their children in a war we should not be. Have a nice day and thanks again.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
17 Jan 09
What would I do? Worry, worry and worry... As for my feelings about the war, I think we went in there on false information and that we are now in a bad situation that we need to stick out. Hopefully things will end up better for the Iraqi people and the entire region.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Hi Dawn, When my sons were little i used to wonder and hope they would not choose to be in the service. So now its really tough and i will always worry as any mother should. Especially in a war that we should not be in. Thanks :)
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85129)
• Shingle Springs, California
17 Jan 09
I'm sure he'll do you proud though and the odds are very much in favor of him coming home safely. My prayers are with you.
1 person likes this
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
18 Jan 09
Last year at this time, my stepson announced he was joining the Air Force, my son is already in the Navy and we could not be prouder. He was in Texas in October when what your son said happened to my stepson - he was killed by a hit and run driver. I know you worry about your son, and I worry about mine too, I have another stepson I worry about and he lives only 3 miles away. It is a mother's nature to worry - it is all part of the Mom thing. If my son tells me is re-enlisting and going to Iraq - I will love him and support him and worry about him. That is the best anyone can do! Thank your son for allowing us to live in this country and be safe. I am proud of him.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
18 Jan 09
Thank you Deb and i am so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine that happening to my child. I will let him know. Thanks again :)
@carolscash (9492)
• United States
17 Jan 09
I am not sure of how I would react to that. My stepson just enlisted in the Army and leaves on Sept. 3 for basic. I figure that he will be in Iraq or Afghanastan before long if things don't change there. It does worry me and I know that it is a lot for the parents to struggle with. However, these young boys(men)are doing the right thing in serving their country. Be proud of your son! Keep him in your prayers! We will pray for him too!!
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
thank you for your prayers. When my son first enlisted he went to south Korea so maybe that is where your step son will go first. who knows :)
@dvmurphy (326)
• United States
17 Jan 09
My son was stationed in Tirkrit, Suddams home village at the start of Operation Iraqy Freedom. He was there for 14 months. It was pretty bad in the start of the war as for six months he was sleeping in a dug out sand pit and then in a tent until they could build the barracks. He came home safe and sound even though he had some close calls. He does not regret fighting over there after seeing what was happening over there. He teaches English in China now. The conditions are better now and we need to finish what we started. Your son will be able to email you and call home plus write. Keep your chin up and write and email him alot. My son loved get letters, handwritten and by email. Care packages to with munchies, wipes, antipersperant, games, dvd's and music. You should start up a support group in your area for parents and loved ones of soldiers who are from your area. It will keep you busy and help others who are also worried.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Thanks and i could not imagine what it woulda been like to have a child over there when it first started. I am very glad he was not old enough then to go.
• United States
18 Jan 09
mssnow, I do understand what you are saying. I'm sure my mother felt the same way when I went to Iraq in 2006 and she will probably feel tat way again around the end of this year. She knows I will take care of myself and I have friends, who are like family going with me to watch out for me. No one ca tell you not to worry about our child, that's what mothers do. I kept in contact with my family as much as I could. I was able to email, call home and write letters. My family heard rom me about three or four times a week. To me the letters from home where the greatest. I could take the letters around with me and read them over and over again. I had a little taste of my mother's love in my pocket everyday, one of her letters. So yes, worry about your son and support him as much as you can. He knows you are worried about him but he also need to feel your love and support more than anything else.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
18 Jan 09
wow, so you are leaving again?? My son was in south korea first which didn't bother me as much. I always keep in touch with him. Tell him i am proud of him and that I love him. thanks and good luck to you as well
@us2owls (1681)
• United States
17 Jan 09
I do not have any sons but if I did I would be like you worried sick but would try my best not to let him know because if I had a son he would be in one respect following in his fathers footsteps. My late husband was a marine and proud of it. He served two tours of duty in Korea , volunteering for the second one. As for the Iraq war - it should not be going on now - when George Bush Sr. sent our troops in to rescue Kuwait from Saddam the UN should have stood by him and let him finish the job and rid the world of the dictator then. I don't think your son will be there all that long because if I read it properly Obama plans on withdrawing all our troops fron there. All I can say to you is - be there for your son, let him know how proud you are of him for serving his country, but don't pour your fears out on him. Good luck to both your son and you and God Bless the USA.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
I feel that if i dont tell my son my worries then he will think everything is fine. He needs to know how i feel. so if i worry about some thing i will tell him. :)I hope we get out of this war soon.
@robert19ph (4577)
• Philippines
17 Jan 09
hello mssnow, As a parent, your reaction regarding your son going to Iraq to work is just normal. Any parent doesn't like that any of their child will get hurt. Please don't get me wrong, why he chose to work in Iraq for as we all know that it's dangerous there. Anyway, what ever his reason, I think what's the best thing that you can do now is to advice your son to take care of his self, go away from any trouble and to pray really hard everyday for his safety. As parent, the best thing that we can do is to pray for his safety always and to be strong and optimistic that he will be fine there. Don't worry too much for that will kill us. Relax and have faith to HIM.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
well he did not choose to go to iraq. the army chose for him. He didn't want to go there.
@izathewzia (5134)
• Philippines
17 Jan 09
I understand your sentiments since I am a mother as well. Yah, letting our children face dangers is really worrysome. I think, it is better for them to be near us than go away and never comes back alive.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Yes and he is so far away. I don't like it. My middle son is away at school but not that far from us
• United States
17 Jan 09
Wow I have not lost someone to War yet but I know how bad it is and how bad someone can worrie about it. But I would like to suggest a song called Days go by. By BabyBash and Paula Deanda I know you may not be into all that hip hop and everything but it's a good sone it's about a lady lossing her man to war.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
well I havent lost him. just he is one for a while. Thanks ill listen to it
@Fortunata (1135)
• United States
17 Jan 09
I'm so sorry your son is shipping out, but I want to say, you should be proud of him, but you're probably sick of hearing that. God bless you, and keep your son safe.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Thank you, I am proud of him and no im not sick of hering it
@gracie04 (4549)
• Philippines
17 Jan 09
It's natural for you to feel that way.. The best thing you can do is pray for his safety..
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Yes, he is always in my prayers. thanks
@Llonorra22 (1150)
• Philippines
17 Jan 09
I Know you're in a tough situation right now. I'm still single but I understand how you feel. I can't call it selfishness, you just worry to much and it's natural for a mother to worry 'bout the welfare of her child. But you just have to accept that your son has a duty to fulfill, just pray hard for his safety.. I'll pray for him too.. Godspeed...
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
thank you and yes it is tough . I have accpeted the fact he had to go
@zamakh (517)
• South Korea
17 Jan 09
i think he will just fine, iraq already messed and can't do anything to your son, i'm pretty sure of that.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Thank you, I hope you are right
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
20 Jan 09
Hi Princess, here's a big Wolfie hug, no you are not being selfish, every mum worries about their sons, doesn't matter if they are 1 or 51 years age they still worry, I think it's the mum's job role to worry! I know my mum worries about me. I think most mums would feel exactly the same way as you, wondering if they are going to see their son again, it is his path he has chosen and whereas it's a job in a dangerous field he has wanted to do it and your love and support is what he needs and for you to be strong otherwise he'll worry about you princess xxx
@stephcjh (38473)
• United States
17 Jan 09
I pray that your son will be safe over there. Mothers will always worry for their children no matter what. You are not selfish at all to want your son to return home safely. I would be very worried for my child also.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
Thank you my friend. i guess its amothrs place to worry
@underdogtoo (9579)
• Philippines
17 Jan 09
We all worry for your children and that is part of our jobs as parents. I used to worry about my son getting lost in a crowd. It is certainly your right to worry but you should also trust in the Almighty to do his job. Cheers!!
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
17 Jan 09
smiles thanks for your advice :)
@camomom (7535)
• United States
19 Jan 09
I would feel the same way that you do. I have friends that went and came back safe and my best friends brother in law just came home a few days ago. I'm glad that they are back but angry that they had to go at all. I don't agree with war of any kind. I do admire and respect our military personell though. If my child had to go or chose to go, I'd be upset and worried, but I'd be so proud of them. I would just hope for the best and know in my heart that that's what they chose for themselves. I'd also pray daily for their safety. I can't imagine what you are going through. I wish you all the best.
@CRIVAS (1815)
• Canada
16 Jan 09
I would be worried too, it doesn't matter where he is stationed, it is your right as a mother to worry about your child. I agree with you, I would rather my child came home a coward than die a hero and I don't care if I sound selfish or not. Not parent wasnt to loose their child. I will keep you both in my prayers. I hope he comes home to you.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
16 Jan 09
smiles. Thanks with all these prayers he has to be ok. He will probably come back and tell me . I am a worry wart. lol
• United States
16 Jan 09
my heart goes out to you and your son.... I would have said the same thing to my son...kudos to him for being brave enough to go, but I would be heartbroken myself til he is home safe and sound.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
16 Jan 09
Thank you and yes it makes me want to cry at times. I kinda wish he was still little so i could protect him :)