How to deal with preachers? (not the religious kind!)

@ahgong (10066)
Singapore
January 21, 2009 9:31am CST
Preachers Out of so many people who you chat with, there are bound to be someone who will love to tell you about their experiences and how you can learn from them. Out of ten sentences spoken, you will definitely hear phases like "you should do this...", "You should have...", "You shouldn't..."... etc. These kind of people will always think the world of themselves. Putting themselves on aI-know-better-than-thou air. They will always be looking down on others, thinking they are below them. Some of them can also be pretty cocky and snobbish. In their eyes, only they know best. No one else knows better than he does. Only he is qualified to tell people about things. To teach them the "proper" way to get things done. How to deal with them? When you meet with such people, if you are not in a hurry to go anywhere, it is always good to listen to what "advice" they have to dispense. Agree with him every once in a while where appropriate. That way, you will not offend anyone. There is no way to make them think otherwise to what they "already know" is the right way. Arguing with them is only a waste of time and breath. If you are in a hurry, well, find and excuse to get out of the lengthy preach session that is about to happen!
3 people like this
6 responses
• Malaysia
21 Jan 09
the best preacher i know is my own mum. haha! and i've been dealing with her my whole life. she's ok because she's my mum and she knows me my whole life. but i can't stand it if get preaches from others who i barely know. they just spoil my mood.
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
22 Jan 09
ha ha ha ha ha... your mum eh? She the only one in your family that preach? I am sure if it is a relative, there are more than just your mum! So, when some one that is not related to you preaches to you, how do you deal with them?
• Malaysia
22 Jan 09
i just nod and give them a smile. but i shut my ears down not listening to what they really say. or maybe look away and dont give them eye contact trying to change the topic!
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
That reaction sounds exactly like what a teenager would do when they are in the wrong and is sitting down to a long lecture from the parent.
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
hehe.. The word, 'should' sounds a bit strong here huh.. lol =D YEah, i do admit i did use such words before, but my attitude is not like what u have mentioned of 'knowing it all'.. BUt rather, i share because i have been through it, and survive.. Thus, it's more or less a recommendation for them.. hehe ^_^ Though there are ple whom really like to be those Mr 'know it all', but it's quite easy to differentiate them.. hehe ^_^ As u mentioned, those Mr 'know it all' will never accept 2nd opinion, but for those reallt meant to share, they will take into account of everything and think of a best way out for others ^_^ hehe
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
I guess we all want to share our experience one time or another. But if that advise is not welcome, we become preachers ourselves. Sometimes it is hard not to want to share. Cos when you walked on the road of thorns before, you wouldn't want the people you love to walk on the same road of thorns to learn the lesson you learnt. But most times, these "ADVISE" falls on deaf ears. And in the process, we became preachers. I know what you mean Kun. I know exactly what you mean!
1 person likes this
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
lol =D That's good.. hehe ^_^ It's more like an advise and not being a preacher.. haha
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@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
Well, advise is only considered advise if it is taken and heeded. Other wise, it is considered as preaching by the person on the receiving end!
1 person likes this
@applefreak (3131)
• Singapore
22 Jan 09
for me, the preaching usually comes from relatives. they'll give all sorts of strange advice based on their own life experiences. some times i'll listen, some times i'll just tune off. it's pretty hard listening to advices that doesn't apply to me. thankfully i don't have people like this as friends. i had a couple of them as colleagues but i avoid them like the plague. lol
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
22 Jan 09
Yeah... most of the preachers in my life are relatives too. And they are usually the ones that are older. And out of respect, we have to sit thru the preaching session. Regardless of whether the preached topic is relevant or not. Like I mentioned in a previous post, when I get to that age, and I start to preach, I sure hope that the same due respect will be accorded to me.
1 person likes this
• Singapore
22 Jan 09
yes yes the elders usually preach more. hopefully when i'm that age i'll not be like that. everyone's situation is different and all we can do is just provide our view on the matter.
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
Yep. Let's see how we turn out in about 20 years eh? That is about the age when people will start to preach to the younger generation.
@naka75 (797)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
I'd rather find an excuse to get away. If it gets on my nerves, I'd tell him/her "You're not me and you shouldn't be telling me how to live. If you're so good, then apply for the Speaking Corner or join the toastmaster club!"
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
31 Jan 09
Speakers corner eh? I guess you are from Singapore too! Well, I will take those comments and note it down. I may use them in future to deal with pushy preachers!
@naka75 (797)
• Singapore
2 Feb 09
Yes I'm a Singaporean. I can't think of any better platform for this group of people. Fortunately so far I've not encountered people that belong to this category.
@zweeb82 (5716)
• Malaysia
23 Jan 09
Just say "Excuse me, I'm in a hurry to go somewhere" - that somewhere is somewhere out from their presence & make sure you do it in haste before they start their crap again, haha
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
23 Jan 09
That is another method that I hadn't thought of.
1 person likes this
@zweeb82 (5716)
• Malaysia
23 Jan 09
HahaWill let you know if I think of anymore, haha
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@Phlamingho (7834)
• Denmark
21 Jan 09
Or just tell the person so shut up and keep his or her opinions to themself. :) If it's a stranger, then who cares... if it's someone you know - well maybe it's time to get new friends.
1 person likes this
@ahgong (10066)
• Singapore
22 Jan 09
Straight, sweet and sharp! Just the way I like it! If only it was that easy to deal with every preacher that comes into your life! Thanks for sharing that anyways!