i need some help/advice

sounds as if you have a good head on you. The separation may actually work...nothing seems to be working for you now so it certainly can't hurt things. It does sound as if he is taking you for granted. A wake-up call may do some good. Like I said...beware. This situation could very well reverse itself. You may find yourself loving it and he may be regretting. Who knows. Then again, maybe you two will find your way back to each other. No matter what, a change will happen and that is much needed. It is not good for you to continue living the way things are right now. I hope that it all turns out well for both of you.

nah wouldn't be looking for other fish in the sea, i'd be keeping my boring old daily rountine, expect with a few welcome changes. like not have to get him out bed and help milk his parents cows every morning and arvo. ride my horse in the morning, pick my son up from school, keep the house cleaner, no clothes to wonder round picking up, plus more. i know the grass may not be as green on the other side as i would hope but it maybe better. he keeps on about things, like i'm not a fit mother cause i've got a tat and a number of earings in my ear that i've just had re done. drags up the past like there's no tomorrow, on things i wish he'd give up on. just little things, and it's just getting worse. one minute it's all fine between us then next it's ww3, i think he may have cooked up something in his head that isn't true. (me and my work mate are having it off) it's a load of rubish, we've got a good friendship that's it nothing more and i wouldn't like to be trying anything cause that's how his bro and wife spilt a few yrs back his wife cheated with a family friend and its gone from there. thanks for you advice

i'm at the point where i'd like to be able to just walk away from everything, but there's to much at stake to do that. we've all tried to get him to see a doctor but he won't or does to keep us quite. may be if i sat at home and didn't do anything expect what he wants i may get somewhere. but i'm not like that, he's lucky i help as much as i do, like there's times when i don't want to do things but do and give up what i may want to do that day. i'm a horse person and love my riding, i don't always want to compete, but just to have my daily ride and i'm usually happy. plus i like my routine, i ride in the mornings after i drop my son at school. it's hard to say which way to go, but i don't know if i'm coming or going sometimes with what he says to me. it's the stuff that is said behind closed doors, that is worse. thanks

You know what, you've done your part. Perhaps the separation might be good. To make him see that he should do something too. But before going on separation, talk to him where it hurts so that he'd listen. Perhaps he thinks you're okay of what he's doing to you because you don't really complain. So, before separation, complain about everything so that he would get the point. Good luck!

it used to be good between us, but i think we've spent to much time together as such. he doesn't relize that, i don't always want to help him especially when he can do a job himself. being apart would make it see if we are ment to be or not. he's wanting to either spilt compelty or stay together, but either he's been told there's a job offer coming but when who knows, then he wants to go and i'm not wanting to move any where i've got a good job, my sons at a good school and coming along in leaps and bounds. plus there's other things to consider, along with the fact we're still in drought and it doesn't look like its going to end any time soon. thanks for you support

he's been on the medication for 3 yrs now, it's mainly affected his performance in bed, ( it takes longer for him to climax) the chronic fatigue was the worst bit, he's nothing like a person with it. he can work when he feels like it, and it doesn't bother him. ive been there all the way and supported him, but it's just seems to be getting worse. i suggested a trail separation before but got no where, on the issue.

it's been up and down today. like this morning he was all over me and the when i got home from mums it was i'm going to town to look at a unit. then he told me why i had to come along. we had to take the dog to the vets with his mum. he keeps saying it's me that has to grow up, so basically he thinks there's nothing wrong with him. it's everyone elses fault. i do care other wise would of had to walk a long time ago, but it's getting worse and his parents are sick of us being at each other. my parents know nothing of what's going on. yes we've got to remember our son, that's why i'm thinking the way i am. hopefully it will work out for the better. thanks for your support

i am, hey did you see my post on my night out, over at the boss's place playing cards? you should have a read if you didn't. tried talking about his meds but he won't do anythin about it and if i mention he gets the s.... i can't leave it's my house, we live on the farm where i work. he doesn't do any chores, he's the first one to complain about it thou. i clean up and he makes a mess. i can't just vacate, wish i could. i had fun last night. we've finally got a bike going for my son, the night before we ended at my boss's place showing them the bike, we're gone for few hours. then last night went over to my work mates place to show him, he's great to talk to. plus is one of the people my partner like to make fun of. you want to hear the laugh i can have at my partners expense. i don't like him saying it and he usually get a hahaha (scarcastically) it can come out as more of a joke or serious depending on the tone of voice. my partners reckons we're having it off up the dairy especially if i'm a bit late over to the inlaws, or the other day it was i'm preg to my work mate. other days when he's got the s..... with me it's my work mate can have me and he'll have someone else. which would suit me fine on those days. there's more but i can be a big b..... take care and i'll keep you up dated.

Yes, I think I commented on that discussion of yours where you went out for cards and had a great time. I was very happy for you to finally get away and let loose and have a good time for a change. Without all the stress he is giving you. You should do it more often, without him. Start treating yourself the way he should be but isn't. He sounds jealous because of his own insecurity. He knows he is not providing for your needs, so he worries that you will fullfill them with someone else. That is human nature, I guess, but still it is very unpleasant to be accused of something you haven't done wrong. Maybe you should tell him that if he keeps accusing you of doing stuff you haven't done, you may as well do it, then. That might shut him up about it. Or, just tell him, the fact that he is accusing you, just proves that he would be unfaithful, because, truthfully, people assume that others will do what they will do in certain situations. I would stop cleaning up after him, too. Make him do it himself. He's just bringing you down. Don't let him. I go out in the barn to do my chores to get away from my spouse when he's being a jerk. I often like my animals way better than him. Yes, do keep me updated. I wish I could do more.