My friend is in a love relation but...................

India
January 26, 2009 12:39am CST
Today i want to share something my mylot friends. My friend is married and she has 2 babies. But she loves a boy. Means she has an extra marriatel affair. She loves that guy very much. But now that boy start to ignore her. And my friend is very upset these days. How can i help her? She meet that guy twice. I also know that guy. She is a nice guy. But i do not know why he ignore my friend these days. In starting i told my friend that do not try to have extra marriatal affair. But she told that she can not control herself. She really love her.
3 people like this
12 responses
• Philippines
26 Jan 09
I agree with their posts. I think the guy has realized that the relationship is not only wrong but has a lot of complications thus he is doing the right thing by moving away. Help your friend to get over him. Tell her as well that she should think about her kids...How does she think they would regard her if they found out that their mom has an affair which caused the break up of their family. Is the love of this guy justifies the pain the kids will go through? I dont think so.
1 person likes this
@mean_queen (1713)
• Malaysia
26 Jan 09
As a friend, I think the best thing you could do is just be there for her. You know it's pointless to tell her what to do now. Even though she has already fallen head over heals in love with someone that she shouldn't, she has to remember that she needs to care for her children as well and not dwell too much on a guy that is already ignoring her. She's now hurting so just be there for her and try to make her realize there are more pressing matters at hand.
@rsa101 (16718)
• Quezon City, Philippines
26 Jan 09
I guess the boy is just doing the right thing of avoiding her since he would be destroying a marriage in that respect. I think you should tell your friend that if she really loves the other guy then maybe make things right first by maybe divorcing her husband first if that is available in your place. I really do think that your friend is just getting too reckless in her actions towards her extra marital affair.
@nympha687 (940)
• United States
26 Jan 09
Perhaps the boy realized that he doesn't want to destroy a family and the best way is to avoid your friend. As for your friend, perhaps you can try to enlighten her about the things that really matter to her. Does she really love the boy or is the boy just filling a void in her humdrum life?
1 person likes this
@fwidman (11515)
• United States
26 Jan 09
My first guess would be that the boy has found some guilt in himself for having a fling with a married woman and does not wish to continue. Or it could be that perhaps he realizes that the married woman is falling in love with him and he is afraid of what will happen. The best thing your married friend can do is stick with hubby and family and forget all about the other man
@zhuuraan (967)
• United States
27 Jan 09
I cannot help you I don't think. Personally, I believe being with another man while married is completely immoral. Perhaps maybe this guy, if he knew she was married, started to listen to his conscience as it was telling him that what he was doing was wrong. Perhaps she too should listen to hers.
@zhuuraan (967)
• United States
27 Jan 09
None of us are mentioning another sad, but likely possibility. Perhaps this guy is just a plain cheater, not caring who he hurts. To him, it could all be a game and he got bored of her and found someone else. Either way, she should've known that what she was doing is wrong and not done it to begin with.
@gotetet (197)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
it seems she lives her life so complicated nowadays. i hope she will realized also why the guy avoided her, i think the guy don't want to break someone else family for that un love affair. maybe somehow your friend realized also she has to break the guy life into pieces, so i hope this time she will decide which is which becuase the longer the time she keeps herself running after him will also allow her to suffer more consequences in the future.
@gracie04 (4554)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
I guess the guy realized that he did a very horrible thing that's why he started to ignore your friend..you know, you should give advices to your friend that will help enlighten her mind.. extra marital affair is a big no, no!
@kissie34 (2296)
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
I guess the guy is already guilty of it.. I don't think so that you need to help your friend no matter how much she love that guy because you know that she's not doing the right thing. Your friend is committing an adultery and her husband may file her a case in the court. Your friend should think about her family especially her children. She don't love her husband anymore and if she really love that guy then she should decide to separate to her husband so that she can be with the guy she love but of course that kind of decision isn't that easy to do since her children will be the first thing will be affected with this problem.. I think that guy is doing the right thing of ignoring your friend since he knows that she was already married and their affair isn't right.. Maybe the guy had felt guilt and able to realized that their relationship isn't good since they were fooling and hurting someone else.. Well, I hope you won't get mad with what I've said above. This were just my opinion about the situation that you've stated above ... If I were in your position I won't let my friend do this kind of stupidity.. I know love is can make people stupid but still I won't let her do something that she might regret in the future.. However, if I can't stop the things that she's doing I will be just right there for her when every time she needs me.. The reasons why I won't help her its because I don't want to be involve in her problem.. I don't want her husband to ask me some questions that I know I can't answer him honestly.. I don't want my conscience to bother me when every time I'll see her husband and children.
@Madona1 (2099)
• Gibraltar
26 Jan 09
I think that boy made a right decision to keep her distance and start ignoring her. It is your friend should wake up now that her two kids are far more important than anyone in her life. It is an excuse she cannot control herself, deep down; she hasn’t given a deep thought what it is important in her life! And the consequence she would pay for if the marriage broke down.
@SomeCowgirl (32266)
• United States
26 Jan 09
I think that the boy could have realized that he was not doing the right thing by having an affair with a married woman and therefore has decided to cease contact as a means to right the wrong he has done.
@tammytwo (4303)
• United States
26 Jan 09
I'm guessing the boy began to feel guilty and realized what he was doing could cause the breakup of a family. Perhaps he is friends of the woman's husband and doesn't want to risk that. Or maybe he just began having a guilty conscience and doesn't want to live with that. Whatever the reason good for him. Now she needs to focus on her family and either make the marriage better or get out of it.