Is there anybody out there just like me??

@yezzyk (180)
Netherlands
January 27, 2009 3:08am CST
Once, I met my soulmate, my other half, my love of my life. We were engaged, but somehow, we could not be together. To protect my daughter from hurting more, I've decided to move on. Found me a man whom I've known all of my life and whom I'm comfortable with. He makes me laugh and a do love him. I just don't love him as I did the other guy. I'll never love anybody else like that. Is there anybody out there who's with a partner they love, while they know their 'perfect match' is out there and you're not with? (My partner knows all about this man, as I also know I'm not his 'love of his life', so we're good)
2 people like this
5 responses
@riyasam (16578)
• India
27 Jan 09
it is good ,you have reached some sort of compromise,the unrealistic expectations of each other causes misery to everyone involved.forget about the other person,life has to move on.
1 person likes this
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
27 Jan 09
Yes I have Riya. Although I did not make any compromises as to how my daughter and I want to live. Fortunately, my bf and I are both not jealous and both feel free in our relationship. If he wants to go out, he does. When I want to, I do. No worries. He doesn't claim me and I don't claim his. This makes it very nice and easy to live with eachother. My daughter and he are close too.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
i like the way that your relationship with your bf is going, my friend. it appears to be so freely founded...no commitments, no hindrances in the relationship. i am happy to note that you and your daughter has found a man who is so comfortable to be with. i wish the best for you and your daughter in your life, dear. may you be continuously blessed with a peaceful and happy life.
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
27 Jan 09
Thank you Trini. I do count my blessings. Have to say that I've learned that to keep one close, you have to let them go. There's nothing more solid than that. Works for me too. The more you set me free, the more loyal and close I will be. Ergo: what you want for yourself, you should be able to give others.
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
my situation is very much different from yours, yezzyk. i got married to a man whom i had no intention of marrying at all. he just forced me into marriage with him by creating a situation which forced me into it. well, while we were living together, i have known the most miserable years of my life. i have waited for the time that he will change into his good self since he has family already. yet, after my second child he stayed to be as irresponsible as he could get. so, i decided to leave him behind as i will go home to my hometown with the children. he didn't allow this to happen. he came along with us to the province. only, he had proposed that we do not separate because, he will be leaving to work for abroad. i thought things will be fine already. when he came back from his stint abroad, he is just as irresponsible as he used to be. well, another child came into the picture before i get to realize this. now, he is with somebody else and my three children haven't forsaken me. they are all of majority ages by now, by the way. so, for you, it is good that you have found a comfortable relationship. the truth is, you only think that you are not that much in love with the man that you are with right now. in fact, you are so very much in love with him and you will only get to realize this once you get separated for any reason there might be, like work.
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
27 Jan 09
Wow, heavy story, Trini. Thank you very much for your confidence in sharing. Well, you're probably right about my love for my current bf. I don't know. I was just wondering how other people feel about this. Your stoy IS quite the opposite...
1 person likes this
• Philippines
27 Jan 09
truthfully, dear friend, i am aware that my life story will pale if compared to those of others who have literally gone through a hell of a relationship. mine might have been difficult, so very difficult. yet, i have heard of some women who have related stories which are unimaginable. this is why time and again i am always convinced that the truth is stranger than fiction.
1 person likes this
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
27 Jan 09
Oh I totally agree with you on that. Truth can be stranger than fiction. That's why, when my daughter asks me some difficult question, I tend to answer her truthfully (but at her level ofcourse). Because I think when you get half the truth or none at all, your imagination could make things very big in your mind and blow it into the worst proportions..
1 person likes this
@rmuxagirl (7568)
• United States
28 Jan 09
There are times when I feel like I am in that situation. My ex was the love of my life and I will always love him, but he made the decision that we would never make it if we had gotten married which devasted me. He told me to move on and find someone who does want to marry me. The man I am dating I love very dearly and I do want to marry him, but there are times when I wonder if I love him more than my ex.
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
29 Jan 09
Hi rmux, Thanks for sharing that with me. I know how you feel. It's like you're always missing something, and the downside is: you know exactly What it is and Where.... In my case though, we both still love eachother. He does not want to be away from me and I, secretely, don't want to be away from him. But it makes it difficult, because I DO love my current boyfriend..
• India
27 Jan 09
Couples do tend to have misunderstandings and fights, otherwise the marriage is not stable. I agree with one of the mylotter here who commented that you tend to realize the love that you have for that person only when you are seperated. Anyways, this website talks of some ideas that were put together by analysing the problems faced by couples generally and the article gives steps to revive a broken realtionship. This is not a referral, just that I can't add all the points here, that I am redirecting to a article. http://www.socyberty.com/Relationships/Steps-to-Revive-a-Broken-Relationship.472763 Happy mylotting.
@yezzyk (180)
• Netherlands
27 Jan 09
Thank you for the link, Worka. Fortunately, these tips apply on the kind of relationship I have right now. We're both well-thinking adults and life has given us enough amo to know that it's not always a fairytail :-) We do talk, we do, on occasion, send the message we appreciate eachother. Thank g for that. Sometimes I just doubt myself to be good enough for him, for I could not give my 100% of ME and my love. I don't think HE blames me for that, I think I blame me for that. Anyway, was just wondering if there were more people like me :D
@Jezebella (1446)
• United States
29 Jan 09
I think there are a lot of us who have been in that situation where we are in love with one person, but they don't want us or for some reason we can't be with them so we move on and love someone else, but it's not in the same way. I mean who really gets to be with the love of their life? I hope against all hope that I get to be with the love of my life whom I see as my current boyfriend, but we never know.