Why do some Parents put their daughters on the birth control pill?

India
January 27, 2009 7:58pm CST
I fail to understand why some parents put their daughters who reach puberty on the birth control pill. Does this show lack of trust in their children or does it show that they want to wash their hands off by playing safe? I thik it is very important for parents to give s oem time to the children. As children grow up into the teens, the comunicatin between the parents and children must increase. Parents must start treating chidren as grown ups and involve the into family discussions and give them some importance in decision making. The children must be taught about what is right and what is wrong. keep a track of your children's friends and who they move around with. Tell them the pros and cons of various things that youngsters indulge in. Make them feel that you trust them and that you will always beleive them.
6 people like this
20 responses
@suspenseful (40326)
• Canada
28 Jan 09
I suppose you are talking about parents who put their daughters on the pill because they think they are gong to be s*xually active and not those having irregular periods, or heavy periods where there is a danger of anemia, like in my case. Of course, I was in my twenties, and I was losing a lot of iron, but for someone to think that their daughter is going to sleep with every boy she sees, shows that they are not teaching her properly, that she should say no. But by giving her the pill, other then for medical reasons, they are telling her it is all right to have s*x before marriage and go ahead and do so. So if the girl was once reluctant, now decides to have s*x with her boyfriend, then the parents throw up their hands and say "what did we do wrong?"
28 Jan 09
If a teenage girl is on the pill then to a certain degree it must be through their choice as well. You cannot force someone to take a pill if they are against it. The pill is prescribed for the reason of settling down the menstrual cycle which can be very sporadic in the teenage years. It is also a pro active response. Teenagers, wether we as parents agree or not, are becoming sexually active earlier and earlier. This is a safe way of ensuring an unwanted pregnancy does not take place. I agree with you that education and communication are paramount when making these sorts of decisions. After all there is more than pregnancy at stake... ie sexually transmitted diseases. But the most angelic, well behaved, sensible girl can make one wrong decision in the heat of the moment and have the rest of her life changed forever due to falling pregnant. Every parent has to make the decision that is best for themselves and their child. No one else has the right to judge either way.
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13662)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I am one of the daughters your speaking of. My Mom was a single parent of 4 when I was growing up...she often worked two jobs and even then there were times when we didn't live in the greatest of area's. When I turned 12 she put me on the pill. It didn't have anything to do with trusting me, talking to me or knowing right from wrong. It had to do with we lived in a rough area and very well developed. Had I been attacked at least I wouldn't have to deal with an unplanned pregnancy. Both my Mom and Stepmom sat down with me and had long talks about not fooling around with boys, having respect for myself and waiting till I was older. My oldest brother also usually kept an eye on me so thankfully I was never in a bad situation. Looking back I'm glad my Mom did it. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG AND TRUST IN GOD**[/b]
@twoey68 (13662)
• United States
28 Jan 09
sorry typo..."in a rough area and I was very well developed." [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG AND TRUST IN GOD**[/b]
@CRSunrise (2964)
• United States
4 Feb 09
I went on the birth control pill when I was 16 years old. It wasn't because I was sexually active. It was to regular my periods a little more. I was able to get to where I knew when my period would happen. Although, if the parents put their girls' on birth control when they hit puberty, at least they would be safe if they do become active. I'm sure the parents don't want that sort of thing, but at least they have the cushion.
• Philippines
29 Jan 09
In my opinion, it's not that parents don't trust their daughters. It's more of being safe and not to suffer from the consequences. Nowadays, anything can happen.
@rmuxagirl (7569)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I think that is partly what is wrong with today's generation. They are quick to be on birth control. I know some girls who needed to be on it as a way of regulating their periods and getting them to be less harsh, but other than that I don't see a reason why a young girl should be on the pill.
@tammytwo (4305)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I think it shows the parents are trying to be responsible. There is no way we can be everywhere with our children. My daughter is 15 and has reached puberty. I don't have her on birth control but would definitely put her on it if I felt the need, not because I don't trust her but because I don't want to become a grandparent when she is so young.
@cripfemme (7719)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I think they would rather have their child be equipped to avoid pregnancy rather then ending up a statistic. I know if my daughter wants the pill I'll help her go get it. Of course this will follow a long lecture on safety, responsibility and relationships. But I will also be happy that she is responsible enough to know that she needs that and will talk to me about it to make sure her needs get met.
@Ravenladyj (22992)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I would say that for some parents is a better to be safe than sorry thing....My daughter is a teen now (she'll be 14 in May) but there is NO WAY I'd put her on the pill just because she's hit puberty..she'll come to me when the time comes and we'll deal with it then BUT I'm very close to my kids and I know they'll both come to me FIRST..some parents may not have that kind of bond wiht their kids ya know...
• Philippines
28 Jan 09
Well, this is a debatable issue, persoanlly I won't do it to my daughter but I guess for some parents that's the best precaution they think they can give to their daughter
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
28 Jan 09
There are various reason why a girl is on pills. It can be medical or just for the mere purpose of preventing pregnancy. If the reason for using pills is because of medical condition, I think we have no reason to ask why. As for the purpose of preventing early pregnancy, I think that they should consult first with their daughter. I mean the communication line about the topic should be open. They should first know if their daughter is active sexually or if they have a boy friend. If you push your daughter on pill, it is like you instantly gave them the right to be active sexually. I think ask first should be done by parents.
• Philippines
28 Jan 09
yes parents should involve their children in family decision making and treat them as grown ups. maybe it's not washing their hands to play safe but to protect their children in case they can't really control their urge. children nowadays are very much different from before, they are more aggressive now, and can do anything they want, sometimes even if parents give them advices they still tend not to heed but do their own will.
@vanities (11351)
• Davao, Philippines
28 Jan 09
hi mercury..i guess some parents knows that their teens are really not to be trusted in the first place..or maybe its one of their solutions to prevent unwanted pregnancies of their girls..in my case i do orient my children about pre-marital indulgence..and let them aware of it..and yes i agree with you on that communications plays a great role in rearing children not only on this issue but includes other things as well..
@Paula1966 (1102)
• United States
28 Jan 09
Communication with your kids is always important. I don't think putting an adolescent girl on birth control means you aren't communicating with them - I think it is just covering all the bases. It also doesn't mean you are not teaching them right and wrong. It is just being careful.
@weasel81 (2502)
• Australia
28 Jan 09
with life the way it is now, in a way it would be a good thing. just to play it safe, like peer pressure among other things. girls are getting younger and doing it, hence more pregancies. not something parents want and it can make things bad between parents. i didn't go on the pill till i was 17 nearly for medical reasons, i was on skin medication. when i did use birth control again i had an implant in my arm, it made me put weight on, and it slowly crept up over nearly 6 yrs. not one anything at the moment, but now have to have an operation in a few weeks cause of problems with my period
@spalladino (17927)
• United States
28 Jan 09
I've always worked very hard to have good communication with my girls as they were growing up so they felt comfortable talking to me about their relationships when they were teens. I encouraged all of them to wait until they were older to become sexually active but also let them know that if they decided not to, that they could come to me and I would make sure they were protected. My youngest is a different story, however, because I put her on birth control pills when she was 17 for strictly medical reasons. Like one of her sisters, she has extremely painful periods and was missing one to two days of school every month because of them. Her older sister found relief when she went on the Pill so we tried that with my youngest and it helped her, too.
@irishidid (8277)
• United States
28 Jan 09
My daughter was put on birth control for endometriosis. For her it was a medical necessity. It was never an issue of trust as we always had an honest and open relationship. We still do.
@barehugs (8992)
• Canada
28 Jan 09
I see what you mean, and agree with you somewhat. However due to the recent increase in teenage pregnancies I'm wondering how many daughters you have raised?.Would you agree that a teenage girl on the pill is preferable to the same girl with a baby? I've been a farmer for 60 years, caring for, breeding, and raising many different animals and birds. I've noticed over the years that young females are most fertile when they first reach puberty. This observation applies the young human females also. There comes a moment in every young females life when its virtually impossible to for her to say, "No." Those cognizant Parents who recognize this Truth will, rather than lock her in her room at night, put their young daughter on the Pill, no matter how well meaning they understand her to be.
• United States
28 Jan 09
There are a lot of different reasons to be put on birth control. The main one is usually preventing pregnancy. In high school I was not sexually active and my dr. still wanted to put me on the pill because I had an irregular cycle and bad cramping. There are so many different things that the pill can help with. It's not always a sign of bad parenting to put your kid on birth control and it's wrong of you to see it that way.
@katran (590)
• United States
28 Jan 09
For once, I am going to play the Devil's Advocate here, because it actually is very common for doctors to recommend birth control pills to girls who had a lot of trouble handling their periods (irregularity, excessive mood swings, bad cramps, etc). It seems like a more and more common trend to handle the inconveniences of that time of the month for young women. I know a lot of girls my age (I am almost 20) who have never been sexually active but have been on the pill since junior high. I do agree that parents should talk to their children rather than just medicate them and hope for the best. I think bad parenting can be blamed for most problems with young people, and unfortunately a lot of parents just want their children to stay out of their hair.