Did you get any household help when you raised your children?

Philippines
February 3, 2009 6:27am CST
Was there somebody who helped take care of your children when they were still small? Taking care of our children isn't an easy task. We are fortunate if we our parents, sisters, relatives, friends or neighbors are there to assist or help us take care of our small children. Professional nannies are sometimes opted to help us oversee our children. When your children were still young, did you personally take care of them? or you got help from somebody else?
2 people like this
23 responses
@Erssyl (617)
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
For a short period of time only.When I was still working in a hospital.But as my first child grew and another two came I opted to leave my work so I can personally attend to their needs.I was a full time mother while they were young and my husband was always out of the country for work.My mother was also there after each delivery to help me regain my strength but not for a long time.
@Ithink (10673)
• United States
3 Feb 09
I personally took care of them, we didn't have outside help and that was with 7 kids. There were times that I could have really used a break as our 2nd to the oldest had colic and would scream and cry all the time! This was in 1985 and I was told he would get better! Now I know yogurt and gas-x works wonders!! I can tell you from experience that being older with a little one is much harder!! Just one tires me out!
• Philippines
6 Feb 09
I know what life you have. . . I can see my mother in you. We are seven children and no househelper. All of us had our own work at home when we were younger. The younger ones were in charged of cleaning the house, the older ones did the cooking, washing the clothes and dishes. Our mother was always there to teach and assist us. It was a good learning experience.
@Ithink (10673)
• United States
6 Feb 09
That isn't our home, I do all of the things that you children did, they may help some but I'm the one that stays up until everything is complete to start another day. I think it is wise to have them help and learn but that is. I probably would actually die of a heart attack if they helped out even willingly. LOL!
• Philippines
3 Mar 09
If you will have a heart attack (God Forbid!), who will take care of your children. But seriously, you still can ask help from them so your work will be lessened and your health wouldn't be at stake.
@carolbee (16241)
• United States
3 Feb 09
I had no help when the kids were little. We had 3 kids under the age of 7 and a big house to clean. My mom was sick and my mother-in-law worked full time. I have no sisters and the neighbors were older. I do have an older brother but he was working and so was his wife. They had kids later in life. Once the kids were in grade school, I could trade with the parents. We had kids sleep over here and vice versa. That was a big help. My husband worked all the time and during certain months, worked 7 days a week. It was difficult at times but I got the job done. Our kids are now adults and have kids of their own. It's more fun being with the grandkids cause I can come home and rest after being with them all day or part of the day. It's quiet here now.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
wow, you're a supermom. . . My parents told me that it's fun and more exciting to take care of their grandchildren than their own children. You think they're right?
@carolbee (16241)
• United States
4 Feb 09
I do agree with your parents. I babysit our grandbaby again yesterday. Was there about 4 hours, played with her, talked to her and really had a good time. Then I left and came home. I didn't have to clean, cook or take care of other kids. It was all playtime when she was awake. We have other grandkids but they live in other states and don't get to see them very often. I forgot to mention above that when our kids were younger, I was in school, worked part time and took care of both my aging parents since they lived in separate nursing homes. Had a big house to clean and 3 kids and pets also. It was fun. I had energy back in those days and was always so busy.
• Philippines
6 Feb 09
Oh, that's too much load on your part. . . . but I'm sure, you are now reaping the rewards of your sacrifices. . Enjoy being with your grandchildren.
@Yori88 (1468)
• Philippines
3 Feb 09
My son just turned 4 months old yesterday and for those months that we are together I am the only one taking care of him. My mother is working and I still have 5 little brothers she needs to attend to and my husband's mother is a teacher. So I can't ask any help from them to stay with me and help me with their grandson. My husband is working at night so he only helps me during daytime with our baby. Anyway I am already used to it so I no longer ask for any help. There is a cellphone I can use in case I have some questions when it comes to problems concerning babies. In fact a lot of my friends are wondering how am I able to do household chores and take care of the baby at the same time. They admire me because I am very wise and good with it. I am not a perfect mom but I am perfect when it comes to love wow!
• United States
3 Feb 09
Just give it some time. It is soooo much eaier when they are little. Right now, they pretty much stay where ever you put them.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
yeah, your son is so young and it is easier to take care of him now. Once he starts walking, then you will also start your headache but it's more fun now to play with him. Taking care of a child and doing all the household work is a tough job but it's time management and sytematic work activities with help you ease the burden. Stay happy. god bless.
@Tinna_He (300)
• China
4 Feb 09
i am taking care of my daughter with my mother-in-low.From my pregnancy,my mother-in-low resignate her job and took care of me.i appreciate her very much.i know she love my daughter very much.when my daughter cried ,she will come to hug her soonest.
@Tinna_He (300)
• China
4 Feb 09
i have to say i have a good mother-in-low.But we are also having some unhappy time because of the large distance of age.she has her idea to take care of my baby.she will feed my baby some food which my baby is too young to eat.every time she will say it is not good for my baby when i bought the new clothes for my baby.she didn't like the style of the clothes which i bought for my baby and said it is ugly.That time i will be unhappy.
• United States
3 Feb 09
hi dorisday1971. We lived with my parents when I had my son and daughter. My mom helped take care of my sin until he was two and half, and I worked. Then I had my daugter and my mom helped care for her too. I didn't work after having my daughter, bc we moved out of my parents house. So now I take care of them alone. Well not alone, my hubby is a big help. He's a great dad. But your right, it is good to have help taking care of little ones. Plus the childern get the benefit of having extended family, and that teaches them more love and respect. Kids need not only mom and dad, but grandma and grandpa and aunts and uncles and cousins to have a wonderfully productive and fulfilling live. Its not vital...thast not i'm saying, but its good, and important.
• United States
3 Feb 09
I spelled son wrong, I said sin...its not sin, its son. Sorry.
• United States
3 Feb 09
My son is 2 1/2 and one big ball of energy. I take care of him for the most part. It is sometimes difficult because I also work hard to make enough money online to make ends meet. It isn't easy, but someone has to do it! LOL. I am very blessed with supportive in-laws though. I am five months pregnant and they have been there on days that it was just too hard for me to take care of him and myself (especially in the early days). They also take him almost every Tuesday afternoon which makes for a half of day where I can get a lot of work done and work on making some money for the family.
• Philippines
3 Mar 09
You are very lucky to have parents in law who can take care of your child when you are busy. My mother in law just live a block away from our house and is willing to take care of my daughter. but my daughter doesn't want to go there without me.
@mayhem23 (185)
• Canada
3 Feb 09
When I was growing up, my mom raised me by herself for the most part. When she was at work, I never went to babysitters. Except, we had maids in the country I used to live in, so they would take care of me.
• Philippines
6 Feb 09
You should be thankful to and proud of your mother. It's different when parents personally take care of the kids.
@TessWhite (3147)
• United States
3 Feb 09
I was a working mom thru out my son's childhood. So I had a baby sitter who looked after him as a baby and also before and after school when he was older. I didn't have any neighbors I knew well enough to baby sit, nor did my family live near us.
• Philippines
6 Feb 09
the disadvantage of living far from our family and relatives is that there is no one to assist us in taking care of our children when we are away from home. . I am glad you were able to get a good babysitter.
@aseretdd (13709)
• Philippines
3 Feb 09
My daugther is only two years old... and i cannot afford to hire anybody to help me raise her... even if my husband is working abroad... so i am like a one woman show when we are in the apartment... But i am fortunate enough to have very kind in-laws... they take care of her when i go to work... and i just fetch her in the afternoon... if that was not the case... then i wouldn't be able to work... so we will be in a more difficult financial situation... so i am lucky to have such great in-laws...
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
You are really very lucky to have in laws who can be depended on to take care of your child. my daughter just turned three and I was the one who took care of her from birth. I have stopped working just to take care of my daughter and the effort is worth it.
@TLChimes (4842)
• United States
3 Feb 09
I can't even get a babysitter for a couple of hours without a heck of a fight or taking out a small loan. Of course with special needs kids it's hard but still. Both my husband and I have parents living very close but they don't watch the kids either. Our kids (blended family) range from 22 to 18 months. The older kids help but all are living their own lives so it takes a lot to get them home and then back to their home and... it's almost not worth it. Hubby and I parent partner style. We each have our roles and we do the best we can to keep things even but we really don't get help.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
it's a good thing that you can get help from your hubby. In a way, you are still lucky to have your husband who supports and helps you in child rearing.
• United States
3 Feb 09
There were times when I *really* needed the help, but I didn't get any. I raised my children on my own and, trust me, it was EXHAUSTING. I had to be in bed rest for two weeks following the birth of my second child, so that was a real challenge because my children's father didn't even want to help me. I was burned out and frustrated, but I made it through.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
yeah, it is sometimes exhausting but it can also be fun. I'm glad you made it through despite the hardships and difficulties. god bless.
@SViswan (12072)
• India
27 Feb 10
I have household help but not to take care of the kids. I prefer taking care of the kids myself. I wouldn't mind a little dirt here and there...but I can't trust anyone else with my kids. My older son is 9...but my younger one is 3...and I take care of him myself. My household help does the cleaning and I don't have the family or the extended family in the same city. Cooking and taking care of the kids are things that I would not entrust to outside help.
• South Africa
6 Feb 09
I have a 5 month old daughter. I have help in the house 2 days each week. I live next door t my mother-in-law so she takes Tayla when I work. It is a great set-up. I love working from home so I get to stay with my girl.
• United States
6 Feb 09
My son is still small. I stay at home with him most of the time. I do clean a few houses though each month. My family and my husband's family are good at helping with him though when I clean. They don't mind watching him if they don't have anything to do and they watch him for free. If they can't watch him when I need somebody then I get the girl at the end of my street to watch him because she keeps kids in her home. She is a really sweet lady and the kids love her.
@bellis716 (4806)
• United States
5 Feb 09
When our children were small, we were 500 miles from our nearest relative. My husband was active duty military (low grade NCO). His take home pay was so small that he always had another job, too. The only time he didn't have a second job was when he was on an overseas tour. Then, I tried my best to hold down his second job as trailer park manager so that it would be there for him when he came home. The only time I hired a babysitter was when my husband came home from overseas and I had to go pick him up from the airport in the middle of the night. The rest of the time, I took both children with me everywhere I went. I got some dirty looks when I put a harness on the youngest after she started walking, but she didn't get to run off the second time while I was shopping, either. Our youngest was 5 years old before I finally found an agreeable neighbor with whom I could exchange babysitting duties. Now that I think back on the situation, I possibly could have found some kind of help sooner, but I just didn't know any better. I grew up on a farm. My mother, with sometimes my help as oldest child, always managed to take care of us kids and work in the fields, too,without any outside help, including any help from our father.
@suzzy3 (8362)
4 Feb 09
No it never occured to me to get help in when my children were small.I worked on a farm and took them with me,when it was strawberry picking the farmer started a creche so my two went there wnen I was strawberry picking, but all the other fruit currants apples and pears they just played around with the other kids.While I worked then I would go home and do all the house work and washing ect,get tea ,bath the kids then put them to bed but they were so tired after a day outside there was not problem getting them to sleep.Everybody did the same thing and I suppose we all helped each other out as we lived in a closed community in the country and it was wonderful for the little ones,but I never had anyone bath or play with them except me and my husband.Nannies were something rich people had but to be honest I would never trust anyone to bring my kids up like I could,they were mine it was hard enough parting with them to go to school.We did not have pre schools when mine were little and we thought nothing of looking after themself it was normal for us.
@4ofmyown (1119)
• United States
4 Feb 09
The only help I got was from my family, so I was very fortunate because I had my children very close together and needed all the help I could get. Even, if it had been an option I don't think I would have gotten someone to help with my kids but the housework and cooking....I would have hired someone in a second.
• Philippines
4 Feb 09
i personally take care of them during first 3 months.. then i have to go to work.. so i got a nanny for each of them.. but after work.. i usually give time for them.. hehehe :)
@laglen (19782)
• United States
4 Feb 09
When my daughter was small, my mom would help when she could. But she worked full time as well. Professional help has never bee an option.