Are You Ever Amazed How Large You Are?

@pyewacket (43962)
United States
February 13, 2009 8:29pm CST
Get your minds out of the gutter. This discussion I dedicate to someone here who started a discussion about her clogged up toilet and she mentioned how her daughter makes uh, rather large turds...the size of elephants....so.... Inquiring minds want to know..... When you take a dump...and maybe you inspect to see your contribution to the world, are you ever amazed as to HOW LARGE it is? Like do you gasp and say...OMG..Did I do that? That can't be from me...How can I have all that inside me? Okay who let the elephant in and switch my poops? If you aren't the guilty party....how about your pets? Are you sometimes amazed at the size of their turds?
12 people like this
40 responses
@blue65packer (11835)
• United States
14 Feb 09
You are one sick puppy!
5 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
3 people like this
@sedel1027 (17868)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I have never thought that about myself but my son and my hubby OMG their poops are HUGE. I swear I don't' know how it fits inside of them.
5 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
OMG--really big huh?
4 people like this
@eaforeman6 (8983)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I miss the bear when I see posts like this...! Ok, I am wondering what the bear would say if he were here to answer.lol I am sure he would have something to say lol Oh , Poo poo, thats what I think about him being gone.
4 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I miss him too
4 people like this
@GardenGerty (92268)
• Marion, Kansas
14 Feb 09
He has passed the baton of poo to you.
4 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Awww-thank you Garden Gerty..I'm honored...uh, I think
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (92268)
• Marion, Kansas
14 Feb 09
No, that is not an issue for me. I wonder more about how many times I have to go.
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Why do you go a lot?
4 people like this
@GardenGerty (92268)
• Marion, Kansas
14 Feb 09
Rapid transit.
4 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I had that a few days ago when I first started taking antibiotics...as much as I hate medications antibiotics really are the only thing that gets a bronchitis bug out of me....not too mention the chocolate pudding squirts...LOL
2 people like this
@Opal26 (17694)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Hey pye! I'm lmao again! I do have to hand it to you, you to have the most interesting and weird discussions on all of mylot! And yes, I am sometimes amazed at the size and length of what comes out of me! I'm not that big a woman, but you wouldn't know that by the size of some of my poops! It's no wonder that my hemmoroids are always acting up! My poor butt! Do you think this discussion can get anymore graphic? I had a cat that made the biggest turds ever! He was a big cat and his turds where huge! I love you Cougar, but boy could you poop! You must have taken after Mommy!
4 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
I'm not tall either..only 5' 1"...but with the poops I sometimes make you would think I was 7 feet tall.. Mmmm...well I try to balance myself out..from doing real serious discussions to wacky ones like this one
3 people like this
@Opal26 (17694)
• United States
14 Feb 09
At least you keep me laughing! We are so much alike, even our poop is alike!
4 people like this
@paula27661 (15900)
• Australia
14 Feb 09
Ha!Ha!Ha! You're so funny!I can't stop laughing! Part of me can't believe you started this discussion and the other is quite glad you did and it has me pondering about it now. I will never have the experience again without thinking about you (isn't that terrible?) and how big "it" is. Upon examination I guess it is quite large, it does depend; I have made size comments to my little daughter before; I have looked at her and then looked inside the toilet and have been amazed I must say!
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL--mmmm...so now you're going to think of me whenever you're on the throne... I'm sometimes often amazed at the size of the turds my cats make...sometimes think I have lions instead
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
14 Feb 09
Dawn was right, it must have been a slow today here today if the two of you are talking turds! ROFL Mine are fine, and my dog is a lady and never poops!.........ok, she does, but I don't get too close to them unless I absolutely have to. LOL Nice topic for the night before Valentine's Day pye!ROFL
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Hey! What better time to talk about turds than Valentine's Day eve.
3 people like this
• Regina, Saskatchewan
14 Feb 09
Well if you must! LOL Can they be chocolate turds? ROFL
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
How about chocolate pudding squirts? I was having that condition a few days ago since I was taking antibiotics..LOL
3 people like this
@nanajanet (4437)
• United States
14 Feb 09
You are too funny!! Maybe this will help (warning, it is very, grossly, graphic, in a way, and an old joke)...[b]The Sh-t List [/b] 1. Ghost Sh-t: The kind where you feel Sh-t come out but there is no Sh-t in the toilet. 2. Clean Sh-t: The kind where you Sh-t it out, see it, but there is nothing on the toilet paper. 3. Wet Sh-t: The kind where you wipe your butt at least 90 times and it feels unwiped so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin your pants. 4. Second Wave Sh-t: It happens when you're done Sh-tting and you've pulled your pants up to your knees and you realize you have to Sh-t some more. 5. Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Head Sh-t: The kind where you strain so much to get the Sh-t out you practically have a stroke. 6. Richard Simmons Sh-t: You Sh-t so much you lose 30 pounds. 7. Lincoln Log Sh-t: The kind of Sh-t that is so huge that you are afraid to flush the toilet without breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush. 8. Gassy Sh-t: It's noisy; everyone within earshot is giggling. 9. Drinker Sh-t: The kind of Sh-t you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread marks on the bottom of the toilet. 10. Corn Sh-t: Self-explanatory. 11. Gee I Wish I Could Sh-t Sh-t: It's the kind where you want to Sh-t but all you do is sit on the toilet, cramped, and fart a few times. 12. Spinal Tap Sh-t: That's where it hurts so bad coming out you'd swear it was leaving sideways. 13. Wet Cheeks Sh-t (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out of your rear end so fast, your cheeks get splashed with water. 14. Liquid Sh-t: The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out and splatters all over the toilet bowl. 15. Mexican Food Sh-t: It smells so bad the room must be condemned. 16. Upperclass Sh-t: The kind of Sh-t that doesn't smell. 17. Fisherman's Bobber Sh-t: That's the kind where you are in a public restroom, there are two people waiting on your stall; you Sh-t and flush two times but several golf ball size pieces are still floating above the water line. 18. Ambush Sh-t: This kind never occurs at home but usually at a party or while playing golf. It is the result of trying to fart just a little, but you end up with trouser chili and you walk bow-legged for the rest of the day. 19. Santa Clause Sh-t: A Sh-t that is so big, you have no idea how it made it down the drain after flushing. 20. Stalactite Sh-t: A Sh-t that gets stuck and hangs from your butt for a moment. 21. Deja Vu Sh-t: When you could swear you've taken the exact same Sh-t before. 22. Five Alarm Sh-t: Your butt hole burns so bad you think it's on fire. Usually after eating really spicy chili or other spicy food. 23. False Alarm Sh-t: After a really big fart you think you might have Sh-t yourself, but you didn't. 24. Titanic Sh-t: The tip of the Sh-t is visible above the water line. 25. Rainbow Sh-t: The kind of Sh-t that is at least 7 different colors. 26. Gangster Sh-t: A Sh-t that sounds like an automatic weapon is being fired in the toilet. 27. Gold Medal Sh-t: A Sh-t you work so hard to get out that you just have to tell a friend about it.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
OMG--I usually don't give brs so soon but this is priceless!! I'll have to copy this...heehee..Bravo..sounds like something that comedian George Carlin would have said--sounds like his humor there
2 people like this
@mentalward (14716)
• United States
14 Feb 09
THANK YOU, Janet, for the best laugh I've had in a LONG TIME!!! Isn't it funny how we can speak the truth, just talking about things that happen to all of us, and it's a side-splitting, hurting your face from laughing so hard kind of funny?
3 people like this
@nanajanet (4437)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Truth IS stranger, and funnier, than fiction!! LOL
2 people like this
@moondancer (7434)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL, pye this reminds me of the show "you are what you eat" when Jillian tells them they have to poo for her. She said that people have to have a good healthy poo daily. This means a what we think would be huge is in fact a normal poo. Now that being said. I guess I'm not the mormal person as I just do small amounts. Once in awhile I will have a good one about wvery 2 or 3 months. I guess I need a cleaning out. I forget what they call it.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Well I have to admit I'm regular...doing a whopper everyday..LOL. Are you talking about a colon cleanse??
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Feb 09
yes, but something about that sacres the heck out of me. So I'll stick to eating the fruits when I can find good ones. And the fiber in my foods, lol.
@Loverbear (4929)
• United States
14 Feb 09
When you finish this, remember that you started the discussion . I was on my honeymoon and from the nerves of putting together a wedding, having unexpected company from my father's side of the family and so much more, I ended up constipated. I bought some exlax and only took one square. It had been about 5 days since I had pooped, and on the morning of the sixth day I FINALLY needed to go. We were in a restaurant and I raced for the lady's room. I breathed a sigh of relief because it was empty, and I was sure it had fermented enough that it would kill anyone who breathed deep. I somehow managed to get in the stall, drop my pants, lock the stall door and squat all at once. It took a couple of grunts and it came out. About that time a very well dressed lady came in the bathroom. I was relieved that it didn't smell... I did the ritual stuff that people do when they finish in the stall and turned and looked down. I swear that sucker was six feet long!!! I didn't even think about it when I uttered "Wow, did I do that???" I heard the snort from the next stall but it didn't register. The next words that fell from my mouth was "Man that is AWESOME!!!!!" That did it for the lady in the next stall, she laughed like a hyena! I escaped to the restaurant as fast as I could, and the seat I had faced the restroom. When that lady came out and saw me, she started laughing again. At the beginning of my gastric problems, I could only eat certain things, one of them was carrots and carrot juice. The first time that I drank carrot juice my poop came out bright bright orange! I panicked the first time I saw the poop, I was sure I was dying!! Then it dawned on my poor feeble little mind that it was from the carrots.
3 people like this
@Loverbear (4929)
• United States
14 Feb 09
When you mention pet poop, When I got the mini Dachshunds I was awe struck at the size of their poop in relationship to that of my Rottweilers. It looked like mouse poop in comparison. Then when I had my sister's dog come to live with me it was like elephant poop in comparison to my little dogs turds.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
OMG--you have me falling off my chair here...can't stop laughing!! Great Poop story And yes, I bet it did freak you out to see orange-colored poop
@guybrush (4662)
• Australia
14 Feb 09
Bwaahahahaha - sorry Pye, I can't stop laughing! This has to be the most HILARIOUS discussion I've ever encountered on myLot - you get the prize! To be honest, I can't say my contributions are anything spectacular. I'm just grateful if they float, which means they at least have enough fibre. Apart from that, they don't have carvings like Mt Rushmore on them - or glowing fluorescent bits, or anything else of interest. Just plain, boring ol' jobbies. Hopefully other members might have something more enlightening to share ... (or NOT ...)
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Well I sometimes break out from my "serious" discussions and lighter up..LOL. Mmm...now how do you know that if they float it means you have enough fiber.. Mmm...well gee, if you ever do get poos that look like carvings of Mt Rushmore maybe you could sell it on e-bay..LOL...hey why not..some people auction off potato chips that are shaped in the style of the states of Texas, or Virginia...and people actually bid for them..can you believe that?
2 people like this
@guybrush (4662)
• Australia
15 Feb 09
I can certainly believe that - I've seen them selling toast with Jesus allegedly imprinted on it, and a whole heap of other oddities. I read a book by Joe Hill (Stephen King's son) about a lad who bought a ghost on eBay ... it was horrible. So I dare say turds with carvings of past presidents would go down a treat!
@lilybug (21182)
• United States
14 Feb 09
That reminds me of my now 9 year old when he was about 4 years old. He would come running out of the bathroom yelling, "Mommy, I pooped and it was THIS BIG( as he holds his hands up to show me)." I swear it must have hurt the boy to get that out. Now me on the other hand, I have no gall bladder anymore and I go several times a day, so I rarely get that much built up to have an elephant size one.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Mmm...but I bet if you added all those poops together it would make for a large-sized one, right?
2 people like this
@lilybug (21182)
• United States
14 Feb 09
You are probably right about that one.
1 person likes this
@GemmaR (8527)
14 Feb 09
Well this is a discussion I never thought I'd see on MyLot! It's the tags that made me laugh the most I think ''large turd'' pmsl! I guess I'd better respond to the actual issue.. I sometimes am surprised, yes. But not usually. Haha! If you think about the amount you ACTUALLY eat, and the amount that comes out, you wouldn't be that surprised at all.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL--maybe that explains it....I'm relatively thin but I sure do eat a lot..so I guess somethings got to give right?
@TheCatLady (4695)
• Israel
14 Feb 09
Sometimes I'm amazed at how large my cats poops are. This is when they decide not to bury them and I have to run to scoop the box. LOL Maybe they just want is scooped now. Why I don't know. I have 6 boxes for them. Oops 8 boxes.
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Yes, I sometimes think I have tigers instead of two small kitties with the size of the turds they make...LOL
@raydene (9875)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Hi Sweets I use a colon cleanse monthly and eat loads of fiber so I have a smoothe move. lol I would suggest that the daughter be given more fiber..say a bowl of hot oatmeal each morning fruits, veggies. Have a happy movement Doll xoxoxoxoxo
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL--well I have smooth moves too...just really BIG ones..heehee
• India
14 Feb 09
Can't believe that you actually started this discussion. But glad that you did, at least It gave most of us a much deserved laugh. As far as the topic is concerned I don't care too much about the size. You are too funny to have started this, kudos!
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Oh once in awhile I stray from my serious discussions...and do a REAL serious one like this...heehee
1 person likes this
14 Feb 09
hehe - you gave me a laugh. I love your expression, 'contribution to the world' in this context. Sometimes I gasp. More often I do wonder how on earth it all got into my dog and I expect to see his hind end gradually lifting off the ground as it comes out.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
OMG--your dog sounds as if he really does make large "contributions" to the world.
@anniepa (27121)
• United States
14 Feb 09
MG, Pye, you do come up with the good ones nobody else would ever think of posting...lol! Let's see here, I'm afraid I'm one of those who must be in denial or something because I kind of avoid looking at it after I take a dump. My mother-in-law is one who loves to describe hers, though, color, texture, size and smell. No, I'm NOT kidding, she really does. Saying "Too much information" doesn't help either...lol! I do see my cats' poop because I'm the one who cleans their litter boxes. I have four young females now and my big boy, Squirt, who does leave turds the size of an elephant's! Annie
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL--it sounds like you named your one cat, Squirt well...yes my two kitties tend to make elephant sized turds....heehee
• United States
14 Feb 09
Quite honestly yes. I am surprised about the size of my turds. Sometimes not always. Hey its the human body. What can you expect? The fact that my body can take a lot of physical stuff I do with it amazes me too. So a giant turd doesn't amaze me too much. Though it should but not as much.
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
LOL--I'm certainly surprised at times...but more I'm surprised at the size that my cats make at times
2 people like this
@irishmist (3843)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Well this is kind of a funny discussion. And to answer your question my kitten lucy who is not even a year old big turds, even bigger than chars. I noticed it one day when I was pooper scooping the litter pan. And I couldn't beleive it lol.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43962)
• United States
14 Feb 09
Yup--I'm amazed at the size of my two kitties poops are at times...more like tiger sized than kitty sized.
1 person likes this