Why do some people, want to know your buisness, but they won't tell theirs?

@cream97 (29169)
United States
February 14, 2009 12:23pm CST
This frustates me about some people. They always want to know what is going on with your business, but they don't bother to tell you their business. Not that you want to know it. But, if you want to get all up in my business then spill yours.. What do you do to people that are like this? I usually stop telling them my business when I know that this is all that they want to know anyway.. This does not relate to myLot, but this reflects on life outside of myLot... Please share your opinions on this matter. Thanks!
5 people like this
25 responses
• United States
14 Feb 09
They are just built that way. I know a family here in my area who are super nosy. I don't talk to them about shi*. They also know what I would tell if they tell a single lie on me.
3 people like this
@cryw0lf (1302)
• United Kingdom
14 Feb 09
I only do this half the time on mylot, the whole reason of being, is the fact that when i ask for someones opinion, or advice on something, i will brief it, otherwise it hurts too much just to talk about it. Someone commented once, about the fact i hadnt spoken about my worst argument, but i'd asked others about it. This is because it hurt me too much to talk about it. If the person comes to my thread, then they're expected to answer the questions, why? Because why come otherwise? To be honest, it does frustrate me, but i understand that people sometimes hurt too much to 'spill the beans' on subjects.
2 people like this
@liquorice (3901)
14 Feb 09
I know exactly what you mean cream. I've come across lots of people who do this. One was a very good friend at primary school (elementary school). We had a very one-sided relationship for years even though we were so young, and our friendship didn't continue into adulthood. I've had a few other friends like this too, (including one who not only wanted to know my business, but gave me all her highly critical opinions about it). These friendships have ended too, which in some cases, was a sad thing. Luckily I've got some really good friends now, and we're all quite open with oneanother, so I consider myself very lucky. I think that the people who don't like telling their friends their business, or don't really like letting you into their lives may have some kind of problem or insecurity. But others may not be true friends. It's difficult to tell. But I find that these uneven friendships don't survive very often.
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13964)
• United States
14 Feb 09
It could be due to a number of reasons. One could be that they're embarassed of their situation and want to escape for a little while by hearing someone else's situation. Or it could be a simple thing as being a very nosey "friend" who loves to gossip to others about someone else's situation. When I ran into someone like that, I learn to shut my mouth up in a hurry and only tell what I want them to know and that's it. Nothing more and nothing less.
2 people like this
@TLChimes (4842)
• United States
14 Feb 09
There is a discussion on here that the poster says, you are a better listener if you don't ever relate anything personal. Maybe the other people are trying to be good listeners. I am of the mind that it should be a balanced give and take. I share, you share, and together it all worked out. I don't always want to tell you my life, I don't always want to hear about yours. If we are friends it should just flow. I guess it's all depends on your personal thoughts on it. I seek balance in all I do. And in friendship there should be no checks and balances but a shared give and take.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Feb 09
I'm in an interracial relationship and to top it all off we have a huge age gap so people seem to find us as an object of curiosity and a favourite among the society of tongue waggers. What I do is I just tell them straight to their faces that my life is absolutely none of their business and they should mind their own. I don't care if they find me rude, they are the ones invading my privacy after all.
@camomom (7536)
• United States
28 Feb 09
I hate people like that!!! I just don't tell them my business.
@spalladino (17925)
• United States
26 Feb 09
I had a coworker like this a couple of years ago. I had considered us to be friends until I realized that she knew all about me and my life...my business...but I knew next to nothihg about her. I was moving to Florida so I didn't bother to cut her off but, if I had stayed at the college, I believe that I would have stopped sharing my life in such a one sided way.
@faith210 (11233)
• Philippines
18 Feb 09
Hi cream97! I guess, some people wants to know more of other people's business maybe to compare themselves or maybe, they want some juicy gossips. I have encountered people like that and when people get nosey, I try to just smile at them and won't be telling anything that I am not comfortable discussing. It is really annoying. Take care and have a great day! lovelots..faith
@suzzy3 (8362)
17 Feb 09
I know exactly what you mean some people used to get everything out of me.That does not happen anymore.I am really guarded.When I used to ask about their life they used to close down and look at me like I was mad and they would shoot off,not to be seen for months.I give them the version of everythings wonderful the kids are perfect,Even if I have fallen out with my husband.the washing machines on the blink and my kids are driving me round the bend.I still tell them everythings wonderful in my life.
• India
17 Feb 09
After completing my master degree, I have no job for 1yr because IT down, for others it is a big issue I just felt they are testing my patience. There are people who always circulates news from one person to other. They talks about other persons news such as mr.xxx has got job after 5 years. It is very hard to bear such type of nuisance,frustration. I thought it is always good to prove ourselves when our time comes, I kept myself calm...........
• Philippines
16 Feb 09
Take it positively. . . maybe they are just curious at how lovely and beautiful you are that it makes them think how on earth do you do for a living to sustain your beautiful face. . . hehehe. . they are just being envious perhaps. You also have the right to remain silent if you wish not to divulge your business.
@bombshell (11266)
• Germany
16 Feb 09
yeah some people like that.i even encountered some friends asking something about me, then when i aksed about her she did not answer.maybe this word curiousity
@Bebs08 (10690)
• United States
16 Feb 09
Well, if people asked me about my business, I will also asked them about theirs after i will share mine. And if they will not tell me even if i ask them, the next time they will ask I will never tell them. Just like that. Maybe these people just want to check if you are doing ok or not. They maybe want to compare whether they are the only ones not doing good, or either doing good.. or what?
• Philippines
16 Feb 09
I'm not the type who bother to ask for other people's business..more also not to easily tell my business specially when they aren't asking--you wont know if their interested or not..now a days, i learned my lesson already..i hardly tell things since you don't know whom you can trust this days...i choose people to tell my business..those whom i know they wont tell others---some people are just to nosy with things only because they cant wait to tell it to others...
@raydene (9875)
• United States
15 Feb 09
Hi Hon I guess I don't think about it much. What I have realized is that people love to talk about themself so I usually ask them question to encourage that. It's not to pry. oxoxoxoxox
• India
15 Feb 09
yes there are some persons in the life of every one which only want to know about your business and not interested to tell their own. i think its one side of coin we don't know what the exactly going on their mind and they don't want to share their view may be they would think that if they will share then that person may go ahead to u. may be other reason
@kellyjeanne (1576)
• United States
15 Feb 09
I just take people like that as nosey busy bodies who just like to gossip about other people and I do my best to stay away from people like that. They are bad news. Purrs, Catwoman=^..^= & Mija
• India
15 Feb 09
Hi There, You are right, I have experienced many times in my daily life, and I too was getting frustated for these sort of peoples, but, now I have found one thing that never pay more attention to them and first learn by little conversation with them what is the cause of discussion, if you find its worth talking and if the opponent is good, he/she will stop asking few basic things, and will show some of opinion to other things, if not, then stop wasting your time, time is very precious, you can earn even in short time, so do follow this, and you will appreciate me. thanks.shaukat.
@moondancer (7434)
• United States
15 Feb 09
hi cream. I feel the same as you. I do feel that it's up to the induvidual if they want to tell anything about themself. But they shouldn't ask from others what they are not willing to reveil about themself.