Comment on this Poem ?????
By shrikantx
@shrikantx (978)
India
November 9, 2006 10:14pm CST
2-All the way 4u
Seems to matter what I do, So I'm saving this 4 U
'cos it seems to be the last piece there is
and you haven't had a chance yet to taste this
fragments of a life you shouldn't miss
Seems to matter what I say, so I'll hold my tongue at bay
and rather use my mouth to kiss your frown away
so your doubts no longer darken your day
so you can hold your head up high come what may
So please, remember that I'm gonna follow through all the way
'cos it seems to matter where I go, I will always let you know
that the place where I am is never far
you know, you're not alone, don't be alarmed
I'll find you no matter where you are
So please, remember that I'm gonna follow through all the way
Oh, my love, if it's all I can do, I'll take the fall 4 U
'cos I will soar when I lay down with you and give my all for U
1 response
@Backpack30 (924)
• United States
10 Nov 06
I really liked this poem, Shrikantx!
I like how the perons who wrote this isn't afraid to say the things that most people are afraid to say-it's like you're reading something that someone you know feels-you can sort of feel the words.
The only advice I would give is this: Spell out every word.
If you want to say "for you", don't type "4u".
If you want to say ""because", then type out "because".
The poem just FLOWS so much better when all of the words are correctly spelled out;)
Thanks for sharing this!
