If a husband hears his wife coughing a lot, what should he do?

@cream97 (29166)
United States
March 1, 2009 1:23pm CST
If his wife is coughing and laying in the bed, what should he do? He is sitting right next to his wife. He is on the laptop playing a game or just browsing the Internet. Should he ask what is the matter? Do anything helpful for her? Would it be mean of him to just sit there and let her stay coughing.. If the husband just sits there and never does anything, then what is that telling you? What do you think about this husband? To be honest, the wife has a cold and that is why she is coughing so much. But shouldn't the husband ask what is wrong or show some kind of concern for his wife. What if he just sits there and never says or does anything?
8 people like this
37 responses
@jyesha (105)
• Philippines
2 Mar 09
a husband must show his concern to his wife, he must ask his wife what is wrong or better give her some to drink and give her medicine or call a doctor and ask for help
2 people like this
1 Mar 09
Hi cream97, Well I think he should get her some water or something to drink and go make sure she is warm and comfy, not just ignore her, that is a useless husband and don't seem to care one little bit, and maybe he dosen't love her at all. Hugs. Tamara
• United States
2 Mar 09
I've been married for 7 years and have learned that some people are just not the nurturing type. If I am sick and I ask for something my husband will get it at the drop of a hat but when it comes to him figuring out on his own or asking what to get forget it. Obviously if the wife is sick it would seem that the husband knows why she is coughing and unless she has a very serious condition (in which she may want to be in the hospital anyways) then I see nothing wrong with him sitting there. Yes her should ask "Are you ok" but if she is sick I'm sure its been going on for a while and he has gotten used to it. Come on people, a cough and cold isn't cancer. If she wants something bad enough and doesn't feel she can get it herself she should ask for it, typical men don't have that mothering intuition to take care of others, that's just the way it is.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
2 Mar 09
I ahd written somehting similar to waht you had written[I read the responses now] and though we are women we seem to see this kind of men in our lives Thatis why we are so used to this and very practical about it.. I also sent you a friend request.Incidentally, I have been married for 30 years. You have become very wise within 7 years.
1 person likes this
@Tianna2 (1274)
• United States
1 Mar 09
I would think that if he cares then he should at least ask if theres something wrong and ask if there's anything he can do. Is this guy so into what he's doing that he doesnt even notice that the woman he loves is in distress? I hope everything turns out okay. Hugs, Tianna
1 person likes this
@cream97 (29166)
• United States
1 Mar 09
Has to be very into the laptop.. Not too long ago he was talking to me.. Then I am coughing about 12 times, and he would never ask me what was wrong.. He is not so concerned..
@faith210 (11233)
• Philippines
3 Mar 09
Hi cream dear! I do think that men have different ways in showing their concern to their wife but that husband you are telling us about could at least have asked if his wife is alright or what is wrong and what he can do to give her some relief. That man struck me as an insensitive and uncaring man. When I am coughing, my husband will always get me a glass of water, sit at my side and caress my back. He always ask me what is wrong and if I want some medicine. He wouldn't leave my side until I tell him that I am alright. Take care and have a great day! lovelots..faith
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Mar 09
i think he should ask what was wrong with his wfe. offer to do something to make her feel better, i would have done that, i would have said screw my laptop, and would have helped.
1 person likes this
• China
2 Mar 09
Maybe the husband you mentioned is too careless to find that the wife doesn't feel good. Fortunately, my husband is not like that.Eventhough I just dont look well he will ask me whether there is something wrong. We know that catching cold is not a serious disease,but the sicker also need others concern especially need the concern of husband which can make sicker feel a little better.
1 person likes this
@rocketj1 (6960)
• United States
2 Mar 09
Men have different brains than women do. They tend to be very focused on the task at hand. They are very task oriented individuals. Women are multitaskers. We can do several things at the same time. We are feeling oriented individuals. Cut him some slack. You would want him to do the same for you.
1 person likes this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
2 Mar 09
Cream , if the wife has a cold the husband cannot sneeze.She is old enough and she can walk up to the cupboard and take her cough syrup. If she is unable to walk or is giddy then it is a different matter.If it is a child it is different.We women would tend to sympathise loudly ,if the boot was on the other foot, but still we too cannot share another person's physical pain.She ought to get herself some quick remedy for her cough.
1 person likes this
@hdjohnson (2981)
• United States
2 Mar 09
1. Bring her some water. 2. Ask her how she is feeling. 3. See if there is any medicine that she needs from the local pharmacy. 4. Tell her to lay down, and rest. 5. Take care of the kids, household work, and breakfast, lunch or dinner. (even if it's take out) 6. Nurture his wife back to health as much as possible. 7. Give her a back rub, start a bath for her. 8. Set some aromatherapy candles in the bathroom. 9. Make the wife some ginseng tea or other herbal tea. 10. Pause his game until, his wife and kids are napping or sleeping and continue to play at that time.
1 person likes this
@sudalunts (5526)
• United States
2 Mar 09
One would think that your husband would ask if your are feeling well or not and do something for you, rather than focusing on the internet. If I am coughing, sneezing etc. my hushand will ask me if I am catching a cold and is there anything he can do for me. Actually, that is the only time he really wants to help me out and make sure that I am comfortable. Your husband should have pried himself away from the computer and helped you out, with water, juice, tea cough medicine etc. He was really acting selfish.
1 person likes this
@checapricorn (16066)
• United States
2 Mar 09
[i]Hi cream, Normally a husband will ask if the wife needs water, massage or medicine. That is how I saw my Dad to my Mom even until this time and my hubby is like that too. Then, if this husband will ignore maybe he is not really that caring![/i]
1 person likes this
@Yori88 (1468)
• Philippines
2 Mar 09
A husband should always have as a priority his wife. That is one of the reason why I am always as ever proud with my husband. If that is the case that I am coughing even without colds or any sickness, he will always asked me what's wrong. He will ask how I am feeling and he will immediately get water without asking if I want it. He will just get water for me because he knows I am a person who always drinks water. What more if I am coughing? My husband is very caring and even in the wee hours in morning if he hears me coughing he will wake up and get water to help me relieve the itchiness of my throat. If there are husbands who does not care with their wives in that kind of situation then that is a sign that they are not gentleman and they don't even care for their wives. A simple ask of "are you okay?" is enough for the wife to feel better. But if the husband continues to play with his laptop then that is so bad and so sad for the wife. I have always been a believer of the saying that if you want to be cared for you must also learn how to care for others especially to your partner who will be the one with you for the rest of your life. So guys especially husbands please be very sensitive enough to your wife's needs.
@iamsolucky (1243)
• Philippines
2 Mar 09
If my future husband will just sit and feel relax even i am coughing a lot then i will think that he dont really care. But i dont see thats coming, because my boyfriend is always asking me if i feel ok or not. he dont like me get sick, he always advise me to stay safe and take care. He is one true caring person. He doesnt mind if i blow my nose, i know he wont just sit in front of computer and ignore me. I love my boyfriend, YOhoooo! Happy mylotting!
• China
2 Mar 09
I think the man is not a thoughtful and responsible person.If I were that man,I should ask my wife what happen with her,and take some pill with her,even so wait her to recover.Because I concern that taking care the lover is my responsibility.
@victorywp (3526)
• Malaysia
2 Mar 09
can i ask you something? is he your husband? at least he did not say "what's wrong with you, dear? can you please stop coughing?" LOL! just kidding... i don't think a husband should just sits there without saying a word or does nothing when his wife is coughing. the basic things that a husband should do are:- 1) ask her how she feels 2) get her some warm drinks 3) ask whether there's anything he can do for her
• Philippines
2 Mar 09
Is that a husband or a rock? I don't know if someone like what you said is just comfortably seated facing the laptop while the wife is coughing. Not unless the person already administered a cough medicine to wife and now relaxing. For sure the normal way should be couples caring for each others well being. If i am sick, my husband would attend to me. Buy me a cough medicine, massage my back with vaporub or some balm to keep me ease and will cook soup for me to keep me well. And will surely would keep watch over me while i am sleeping. I am sure that this should be the right scenario if a husband really cares for his wife and vice versa. Sad to hear if that was a husband who is neglecting a sick wife. It must be a rock or was it pretending to be a person but in reality it is really a rock.
• Philippines
2 Mar 09
You should ask her if she wants to go to a doctor and while she is coughing spank her back so that the phlem will go out.Show to her that you are concern and you want her to get well.
1 person likes this
@ank_47 (1963)
• India
2 Mar 09
he can advice her, if she covered her mouth or not. if not covered,he can tell her to cover.he can give advice to her to take any medicine for cough. he should not be rude to her or sit idle without telling anything to her ,as because cough can go within one two days. he should not sit ilde ,without telling her anything .with these small things only he can show concern to her . we can know the love with each other with these small concerns only .
• United States
2 Mar 09
i cough all the time with my asthma but my hubby will still ask me if i am having a coughing fit if i am okay or not.. if i wasnt one to cough a lot it would bug me if he didnt seem conserned i think
1 person likes this