Grouchy, negative, winy co-worker, How do you deal with it?

@succed (879)
United States
March 23, 2009 10:50pm CST
I have encounter so many of them. No matter what kind of environment or what kind of company that you are work with, no matter how great the company you work for there is always few workers that is so miserable. I dont know what it is. I would like to go to work peacefully and smoothly throughout my 10 hours graveyard shift. This lady that I work with, every time she come in she storm from that door banging and dropping her stuff hard on the floor and kicking chair. Like people look at her and asked 'Where did it come from?' the moment she start logging in she would start to say F** this and F** that. Good Lord I have never swear or curse but at least have some respect to your co-worker. She is very loud and obnoxious and very negative to everyone who she works with. I tried to ignore her but I can not concentrate my work as she is so loud that it seems to me she is doing it intentionally for attention purpose. Okay, okay, I understand if you have great problem at home please dont bring it to work. This add too much pressure to other workers. We dont deserve to hear your miserable life. You can choose to be that way that's your life but please enough is enough. How you people deal with this scenario. I can't help thinking about talking to my Boss personally about her negativity. Any suggestion would greatly appreciate.
5 responses
@zhuhuifen46 (3486)
• China
25 Mar 09
It is mainly the company culture that counts. The HR needs to lead for the right direction as to improve the work environment, and employee basic behavior. In a society boasting of freedom, or lacking education in social manners, some people are spoiled. I see workers smoking on line, listening to radio and chatting. That is a rare view in modern plants, or in some parts of the world. The influencing institutions need to upgrade sense of urgency, to develop personality of the nation as a whole, so that your complaint could be eased in due time.
@succed (879)
• United States
25 Mar 09
Thanks, I do not want to bring this up to HR yet as we know when this happen she would get fired right away. But we do not want her to get fired as she has 2 kids a single mom. If the constructive criticism does not work then yes Hr would be the next move if she doesn't straighten her behavior.
@lynnemg (4539)
• United States
25 Mar 09
Have you tried talking to her? If you think that she would listen to you at all, tell her how her negativity effects you and your ability to do your job. If you don't think that she will listen to you at all, then you should talk to your boss. Your boss can talk to her and let her know that her actions are inappropriate at work. You should not have to deal with that sort of negativity at work. The last time I had to deal with someone at work who was constantly complaining about the job, I was working in a nursing home, and I had enough of it one day. I looked at the person and said, "If you are so unhappy with this job, then why not find a different one?" I never heard the complaining again.
@succed (879)
• United States
25 Mar 09
Can you tell me the proper way to tell her so that I wont hurt her feelings. I do not want to be her enemy. I just want her to stop being so grouchy and cursing and yelling for no apparent reason. If anyone read this could you please suggest me the decent and nice and proper way so that I will avoid any complication as it is she already complicate herself.
• Philippines
24 Mar 09
That can't be helped. In working for a company you don't tend to pick up who you'll be working with. In my end, I handle it as smoothly as I can. I have a friend who's always seem to be angry all the time. When she was not my friend yet, we get annoyed at her being so grouchy. She seldom speaks with anyone of us. One day I was in a very good mood when I get the chance to pass by her workstation. As usual I found her cursing again. Maybe it was my mood, I tapped her back and jokingly told her to cool down. Then I stopped by for a moment and curiously ask her what's the matter. I get to listen to what she has to say. When she cools down, I again jokingly tell her lighten up, breath in breath out and count till ten. If it won't work, count till thousand till she feels better. Since then it lessened her bad moods and I tried to bridge her to my co-workers. So far it's paying off. Her bad moods lesser and she's gaining friends. Try it but be ready to be a good listener and you need to get broader patience. Sometimes people like them just wanted attention and to be heard.
@succed (879)
• United States
24 Mar 09
I am the person that likes to be friendly with all. No matter what, but I can not befriend with someone who curses a lot. I have only one life to live and I do not want to mingle with someone who is very negative in everything. God help me!
@kprofgames (3103)
• United States
24 Mar 09
That's a hard one. I did work with a constant complainer, but she was mild compare to your walking "it". The way I shut this gal down is when she starte to whine about something, kids, husband I'd just ask her how she was going to change that. If she complained about it again the next day, I'd just say - you haven't solved that yet? She got the hint. I'm just not interested in her complaining all the time. I hear ya, we all have enough going on in our own lives that we don't want to hear someone going on about their own. Not so much that we're not interested, it's that you know they're just doing it to whine and cry about it and will never change anything. Are you the only one that she effects? I think it would be a hard call because if you are in close quarters and don't have a lot of others working around you, she might guess who said what to your boss and she'll direct all this missery directly at you. It's a hard call, but I can understand why you're sick of it. Who wants to listen to cursing all the time and someone whining about everything.
@succed (879)
• United States
24 Mar 09
You got it right. Everybody knows at work knows what she is and who she is but nobody did anything. Profanity at work is just offended me. She would say a single word followed by F** this, and F** that.. It is so depressing.
@maezee (34508)
• United States
24 Mar 09
Tell your boss that it's seriously affecting your work. Make a formal complaint; you have that right. Your boss deserves to know, and you and your other (nicer) co-workers deserve to be able to work in a better and more professional environment. It's TOTALLY disrespectful to you and the company she's working for to be swearing and disrespectful to other co-workers. Explain to your boss that it's unprofessional and distracting, and ask them to please keep the complaint anonymous. Hopefully the boss will give them a warning or speak with them about it. The funny thing is that I was in this same position, only MY BOSS was the negative one who always made me dread going to work. It was horrible, she'd swear, be nasty, and generally make days harder than they had to be. It really ruined my time there. I really couldn't do anything, considering SHE was my boss, so, I just waited it out patiently. Funny thing is that she got fired (karmic retribution, perhaps?) and now I have the most amazing, wonderful, and positive boss a girl could have. I'm SO thankful and I don't take her niceness for granted at all.
@succed (879)
• United States
24 Mar 09
Sooner or later something has got to be done with it. It is sickening to hear all the profanity and negativity, the yelling, the cursing, the kicking, the attitude. I can't handle it. I just close my eyes and plug my ear and pretending I did not hear anything. I do not want this lady get fired. She is a single mom with 2 kids. but geez