My daughter keeps saying that she feels sick. Not sure if she really does..

@liquorice (3887)
March 28, 2009 8:28am CST
My three-year old was sick the other night, as in throwing up. It just happened once, and she seems fine now, and is eating quite normally again. However, every so often she starts crying and says that she's going to be sick again. We always rush her to the nearest toilet, and sometimes go home from wherever we are if we're close by - but then she says "I'm not going to be sick". Now, we don't know whether she's really still feeling sick, whether she's just pretending or whether she's developped a fear of being sick that's causing her to do this. I hate doubting her like this, but we're finding it hard to tell what's going on. We tell her that it's always good to tell the truth and she seems to understand this. Today we tried to go shopping, but before we got there she said she was feeling sick, so we turned the car round and went home. When we got home she said I'm not going to, I'm fine. So we tried again. Then the same thing happened so we went home again. At this point she went crazy, saying that she's not going to be sick and she wanted to go shopping! Is she playing us? Am I being harsh? What would you do?
4 people like this
21 responses
@Shar19 (8231)
• United States
30 Mar 09
This could be a few things. Maybe she really is sick with the stomach virus that has been going around. She could be just nauseous and is afraid she's going to throw up if she isn't home by the toilet. My daugther was sick with this the other night and then the next two days she was just nauseous but didn't want to go anywhere. It's also very possible that it's all in her head now that she might "get sick" if she is away from home. Sometimes the whole fear of being sick stays in a child's head because they were traumatized when they threw up. Then they are afraid to leave the house. I'd wait a couple days and if she's still nauseous, take her to the doctors. If she's eating fine then you know she doesn't still have the stomach bug. Then it's all emotional.
18 May 09
Hi! I have found reading all these posts brilliant. I have a 6yr old daughter who eats well & is very active anyway i pick her up from school and she is all smiles and happy as SOON as we get into the car for our 2mile journey home, all i hear is "I feel sick" over and over...... I really dont know what her problem is?!!! She also has trouble "pooing" at times too so wheather or not its all connected i dont know, BUT it seems to be just in the car :( Anna xxxx
18 May 09
Hi! I have found reading all these posts brilliant. I have a 6yr old daughter who eats well & is very active anyway i pick her up from school and she is all smiles and happy as SOON as we get into the car for our 2mile journey home, all i hear is "I feel sick" over and over...... I really dont know what her problem is?!!! She also has trouble "pooing" at times too so wheather or not its all connected i dont know, BUT it seems to be just in the car :( Anna xxxx
• United States
29 Mar 09
im wondering if its a food allergy or a digestion problem.. i have a digestion problem that i dont get all the nutrients in my food so if i dont take pills i pretty much am always hungry BUT when i would eat i couldnt eat much with out feeling sick.. i wouldnt throw up but i would feel like i was going to.. then 30 minutes later i would be starving again.. i think i was like 20 before they figured it out.. and honestly it was a nutrionalist that did figure it out. i went to a top gastro since and they cant find anything wrong with me but when they saw me gaining weight and being healthy after taking those pills i had told them i needed (i had moved from the other doc and ran out and dropped 40lbs in a year) they just decided to trust me on it.. i wonder if its something like that or maybe she has a weird virus or something.. i mean some viruses just pop up with nasuea every once in awhile for days straight but nothing comes of it
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Hmm, that's interesting. Of course it's impossible for me to tell, but it could be soemthing like this. I'm getting the feeling though that she is just very scared of throwing up again, and maybe getting a feeling in her throat that she associates with feeling nauseous. I'm glad you figured out what was wrong with you, so great that it made such a difference. What pills did you take? I'll see how she goes, try to reassure her and see if it wears off. If not I'll go back to the doctors.
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@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
28 Mar 09
Hi liquorice! Difficult one this one As you say she could well be frightened of being sick again and thinking about it, the sensation that she is going to be occurs and then passes. It could also be that she has realised the 'power' she has by saying this. Everything stops if she say she is going to be sick. Is it necessary to turn round and go home? How about taking some sort of disposable bag that she could use if it really happens without giving up and returning home?. Maybe, if she is just playing, once she realises that it does not alter things, then if that is the case she will stop. Please keep us informed and I hope it passes.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Mar 09
I agree with Diana
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@liquorice (3887)
28 Mar 09
Yes, you're probably right. We went home in the end as she was also tired and grumpy because she was in need of a nap, and that probably wasn't helping things! My husband went out to do the shopping while we stayed home. I'll see if it resolves itself in the next day or so and take a bag if we go out. Thanks for your views.
@sunnflr (2767)
• United States
28 Mar 09
Might be a good idea to have a check up with her doctor. It could be motion sickness, anxiety, or something like that. Or, like you said, she is afraid of getting sick again so the least weird feeling makes her say she's sick. It really is hard to tell when children are that young. I'd go to the doc though, in case something is wrong making her feel sick.
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks sunnflr. I took her to the doctor's, and, (as is the rule when taking a kid to the doctor's), she was in high spirits; in a really great and healthy mood! The doc probably thought I was crazy even thinking she could be sick, lol But I explained the situation and he examined her. He made her laugh and she had a great time, and he said to me "yes, she's fine". I asked him if he could reassure her that she was fine and he did. I was hoping that this would be the end of it, but shortly after we got home she said "I feel sick". I think this will be an ongoing thing that will hopefully wear off some time.
@sunnflr (2767)
• United States
7 Apr 09
At least you know she's healthy! That has to ease your mind some. Hopefully she'll outgrow the "feeling sick" sometime soon. She'll probably just forget about it and move on to something else. Good luck!
• Australia
29 Mar 09
Everything you are describing sounds alot like anxiety. With anxiety you usely get sick or anxious and feel like vomiting, pale, dizzy, and your body just does not seem well. Most of the time it's when you are going somewhere, or sometimes it just happens for no reason. Does she have any relative with anxiety? I know about this because when I was a younger girl I suffered from it aswell. I would say to take her to the doctor and see what she or he thinks. I am only doing a suggestion, however post people like I said with the symptons your describing do suffer from anxiety.
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks a lot for your answer. It's an interesting suggestion, and she definitely does seem very anxious about throwing up again. She seems convinced it's going to happen. The doctor said she seemed fine physically, but if it carries on then maybe I'll take her back and see what they recommend for an anxious child.
28 Mar 09
that's a really hard situation, i dont have experience with children as i am only 16, maybe she is allergic to something she eats often, i have a simmilar problem but it is because i have gall stones. i doubt to your daughter has these as they take alot of junk food to develop. this could be one for the doctors, they would surely be able to tell if she is really ill or if she is pretending. i hope this has helped and good luck!
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@liquorice (3887)
28 Mar 09
Hi woolford, thanks for your answer. I'm sorry that you've got gallstones, that must be really painful. She hasn't had any allergies to anything before, but I know they can start at any time. I'll see how we go over the next few days, and if she still seems ill I'll book a doctor's apt. Thanks!
28 Mar 09
oh, i forget to say i hope she gets better soon
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@Jshean20 (14349)
• Canada
29 Mar 09
This is a tough one, sometimes it's so hard to read a situation when it comes to children. It would make sense that she's still feeling a little on the rotten side, especially if it's only been a few days. I know after throwing up (atleast with myself), it takes a few days to start feeling 100% and I remember how much a stomache can ache even days after from being sick, I guess from your stomache muscles having to work so hard when throwing up, it's not pretty. I guess your best bet would be to ask direct questions when she says she feels like she's being sick, see if she mentions being dizzy or having a sore stomache, etc. Certinaly you're not being harsh, lets face it, sometimes kids like to test our minds just to see what kind of reaction they get in return. I hope I've helped in some way, hope she feels better soon either way :).
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks a lot for your answer. It was helpful, and reassuring. She is still complaining about this, even after having the doctor assure her that nothing's wrong. When I ask her where she feels sick she just says in her throat. She's not dizzy (and most of the time is in a great mood!), she's eating normally and doesn't have a stomach ache. I don't think it's a reaction thing (although I may well be wrong), and it seems like she's genuinely scared of being sick again.
@nsujin (91)
• India
29 Mar 09
Consult a doctor
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
She's still saying this even after seeing a doctor, and him giving her the all-clear. So it's still confusing..
@ShepherdSpy (8544)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
28 Mar 09
My Opinion on this is,If this is getting to be a habitual thing with Her,You should take Her to the Doctors for a checkup.Being sick just the once could be put down to simply having an upset tummy..but More than once or regularly could mean something's wrong.. Had she eaten anything beforehand that might have disagreed with Her? Does She have a raised Temperature? any indication of pains? Keep an eye on her,and just in case have something usable as a barf bag with You, but I don't think abandoning your plans when out each time is necessary..
@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
No, I don't think we'll continue to abandon our plans as we have to eat, etc.. She was only sick once. Since then (more or less) she's complained of feeling sick on and off, but she hasn't actually thrown up again. She seems well in every other way, has no temperature, is eating normally and doesn't seem to be in any pain. It's a mystery! I'll keep an eye on her and take her to the doctor's if necessary. Thanks for your answer.
@cupkitties (7421)
• United States
28 Mar 09
Sounds like someone sees the effect of her "being sick" and is using it to her advantage. Everything was dropped for her and all of a sudden the whole world revolves around her. How much gas is that costing you to have to get started off to some place and then turn back around? Don't turn around next time. Just keep going. I bet she sticks her finger in her throat to cause herself to vomit so I would be prepared and if she does it then discipline her. I had an almost similar experience with my older child when she was three and it didn't last very long when she learned it no longer got her what she was looking for.
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks for your answer cupkitties. We no longer stop and turn round, and we're trying to not react so much when she says it. It's been going on for a while regardless, and it seems like it's a genuine fear of vomiting rather than just an attention thing. I sure hope she doesn't start putting her finger in her throat. How did your child even think to do this when she was three? Must've been disturbing...
@krajibg (11923)
• Guwahati, India
28 Mar 09
You have nicely elaborated the issue. Noe it is difficult to judge from here but the descriptions says lot about your child. She is not sick or whatever but likes to attract attention and in many child I have this tendency. She is perfectly ok but it seems there is lacking something in you parenting her. Take care of that she would be aright.
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@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
Thanks for your answer. Yes, she may be doing it for attention, or maybe through some fear of being sick again. I'll watch her carefully and see a doctor if it continues.
• China
29 Mar 09
I think you should go to see the experts on child.
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@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks for your answer. Went to see the doctor and he found nothing to indicate she was ill.
@ying470 (60)
• China
29 Mar 09
What d funny question,do not just take her to see doctor yet
1 person likes this
@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Thanks for your answer. She's still complaining of this even after seeing a doctor, so we're still confused!
@parvezs (105)
• India
28 Mar 09
Try to ask her what's actually happening to her. Try to know and find out through her actions and behaviours. Take her to a good doctor and make her sure that now she wont feel sick. May be the thing has entered her mind so strongly so she is doing so. Three year old child can be moulded easily so make her mind strong first and try to avoid once taking her back home or anywhere when she says the same when you are out and check what happens.
@liquorice (3887)
7 Apr 09
Yes, I'm still not sure what's going on with her. The doctor wasn't sure either. He said it could either be an attention thing or maybe some mucus in her throat; that you can never tell with children, and if she keeps getting upset about it I should give her a hug. I was hoping his reassurance would stop her saying this, but it hasn't. I think it's a genuine fear of throwing up rather than an attention thing, but I'm hoping she forgets about it. Thanks for your answer.
• Philippines
28 Mar 09
maybe she was just trying to get your attention, Do you spend most of the time with her? maybe you can talk to a child psychologist to explain to you what is really happening to her. Is this normal or not?
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@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
Well, she has my attention a lot of the time! I am a stay-at-home mum, so I do spend most of my time with her. I might try taking her to the doctors if this carries on and see if they can rule out physical things. Thanks for your answer.
@miamilady (4910)
• United States
28 Mar 09
How long has this been going on? If it last more than a day or two I'd take her to the doctor. If you need to go out and she isn't showing any other signs of illness, maybe you can just go about your business and bring something along like a baggie or a cup, just in case she can't make it to the bathroom in time. That might sound gross, sometimes, when you have children, you have things that you need to get done (like grocery shopping) and you just need to be practical. I don't think she's pretending, but it could be something psychological, but I wouldn't jump to conclusions on that either. First you have to rule out physical problems THEN you start looking and psychological reasons.
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@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
Hi miamilady, it's been going on for about two days now. From a couple of days after she really did throw up. What you said isn't gross, I think you're right about trying to carry on as normal. I will take bags with us. I'm thinking that it may be psychological as sometimes she tells me "I'm going to be sick" and then seconds later she's forgotten about it and is singing . It's a difficult one as I obviously don't want to doubt her and then find out there is something wrong. I'll see how she is tomorrow and maybe take her to the doctors if it continues. Thanks for your answer.
• Philippines
28 Mar 09
Better bring her to a doctor so you will know whether she's telling the truth or not. A three year old may not be able to distinguish what's wrong with her body. maybe she is really not feeling well but pretends to be well. Bring her to a doctor to make sure she is fine.
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@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
Yes, I'm thinking of taking her to a doctor if she keeps saying it as there's no real way of telling. Although I'm dubious as to whether a doctor would be able to tell either! Maybe they could give her a bit of a checkup though.
• United States
28 Mar 09
I am sorry she was sick and I am sorry you are dealing with this right now As a mom of 5 I can only offer my opinions so here they are 1) She may still have a little of the bug or some gas bubbles and she occassionally gets the fleeting feeling of nausea but it passes quickly 2) She was emotionally upset by being sick and is now afraid of getting sick again so she stresses out about which causes a false feeling of nausea 3) She realised that she got alot of attention when she was sick and wants to continue to get that attention even though she isnt really sick. No parent wants to believe the third option but it happens I would not cater to her if she hadnt thrown up in awhile if a parent doesnt stress over it and give extra attention she will relax and it will stop Good luck!
1 person likes this
@liquorice (3887)
28 Mar 09
Thanks. And as you're a mum of 5, I certainly respect your opinions! Yes, it could be any one of those things. And looking at her it's really hard to tell which. She doesn't seem totally herself, but I'm not sure if that's because she was so disturbed by being sick or if she's still really feeling ill. We'll try not to pander too much to it, although we're also trying not to be totally unsympathetic as she seems genuinely disturbed by something. Hard to get the balance right! Hopefully it will blow over soon as something else occupies her mind.
• Australia
30 Mar 09
haaaaaaaa. It is really fun and crazy. My little child is same. We can not do anything. The first time was happened, I was really angry. After that, i find he is just a little boy. It is ok. Next time, you will know about your child. After few times, i can find when he is seroius and when he is nasty
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• Philippines
28 Mar 09
The child is doing such maybe because she love to be with you. Her mind has been programed that when she is not feeling well, you can be on her side. Some kind of having to the take your attention coz maybe somewhat your busy with work or many things. Children really will find the time to be taken cared of specially the mother, wherein no one can have the same love and attention as a mother can have.
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@liquorice (3887)
29 Mar 09
Yes, maybe it's an attention-seeking thing. It's really hard to tell. I don't work, so I am with her a lot of the time. It's nice what you said about mothers, and it makes sense that it could be something like this.