Do you feel self conscious when being commented on your appearance?

@mermaidivy (15412)
United States
April 3, 2009 10:45am CST
especially by your loved ones? I don't really care if somebody that I don't know comment on how I look or whatever, nobody ever commented negative on me though. The only person that I will care if he says is my loved ones, sometimes he comments negative things on me, I feel upset but he says he is just teasing me but I didn't think he was, otherwise, how come he says it over and over again while I have told me I don't think it is not teasing. What do you think? Are you very self conscious person?
4 people like this
9 responses
@laedyan (190)
• Philippines
4 Apr 09
Hello there. I am very conscious in terms of appearance and i really care when somebody commented on the way i look or dressed. In my younger years, i don't care what people say since i'm still a child and i don't really have in mind the term consciousness and everything. But now, i like to know if my appearance for the day is good or not by asking my friends. They tease me sometimes saying that my dress is the worst or i'm like a person who lives in a far away place. But at least, my past boyfriends never commented on the way i dress. They just look at me and smiled everytime we met. I don't have a boyfriend now though so i don't have anyone who can say how i look except for my friends around me everyday.
2 people like this
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Thanks for sharing! :-)
@SKYRYNE (100)
• Philippines
3 Apr 09
Hi dear, Im very interested with your topic. same with my BF, he's always commenting on my look. the way i dress, may hair etc. he wants verythings perfect on his eyes. Im not good fearing enough girl, im just a simple lady and he's trying to change the way i am. I felt insecure and concious for my self. One day, i decided to break him up coz he dont love me the way i am. That time i talked to him for split up but he never agree. i explain my side regarding the way i am. But, he really understand and asking for apologized.He never intend to hurt me that way. He explain to me why he do that. The reason why,he wants me to became a net lady and beautyfull in his eyes always coz i came to his life as an angel he want to love me million times and he care more about me,, thats why he do that. That time i understand then i try to change the way i dress and put some make up. For now, we been for 7 years in good loving relation. The reason he do that because he care about you and he loves you. He doesn't want to hurt you. So forgive him. ok? dont misinterpret it..anyway, happy mylotting!
2 people like this
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
3 Apr 09
Thanks for your response! :-) I'm not mad at him, I just get upset everytime when I hear that. I feel comfortable the way I am and "something" that just won't change forever, you get what I meant? So I just hope he was really teasing me...
@ANTIQUELADY (36488)
• United States
3 Apr 09
no, i'm not. u need to build up your self esteem. shock them all. learn to stand up to all of them. make yourself proud!!
1 person likes this
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Lots of people give me compliment but just not so much of him...
@ajithlal (14569)
• India
12 Apr 09
I also think good self esteem is needed to be proud of oneself.
@rosdimy (3936)
• Malaysia
4 Apr 09
No, because usually it is the way I am. My present spouse did try to change the way I look but I resisted. She was actually trying to make me look more like her ex. That to me was unacceptable. Furthermore in any relationship there should be a general acceptance of the physical appearance of the person we claim to love. If we try to bow down to every comment then it means we are discarding our real identity. all the best, rosdimy
1 person likes this
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
She was too much if she was trying to change you to be the way her ex looked I think... Thanks for sharing! :-)
• United States
8 Apr 09
Oh I can totally feel where you are coming from. My boyfriend nitpicks on everything that is wrong with my appearance and it is very disheartening and frustrating, its only natural to get insecure. My bofriend uses the teasing excuse as well, but he still continues it even after I tell him it bothers me. One thing that I did start to realize is when i recently gained 5 pounds, this was a needed 5 pounds because i was only 80 pounds before at 4'11"....but anyways he started calling me tubby! but i quickly realized that he was doing it because it made him feel more secure about his flaws because he is about 15 pounds overweight. Yes it is messed up that he does it but I try real hard to no let it get me down too much
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
8 Apr 09
It sounds like me and him. I told him I don't think that was tease but he still does that... Thanks for the response!
1 person likes this
@bird123 (10526)
• United States
5 Apr 09
I only have to look at myself a couple times a day.For those who do not like my appearance, ISN'T THAT THERE PROBLEM?????If he is just teasing, I have found in my long experience that those who dish it out can rarely take it.Make a few comments of your own. See what happens. Remember communication is crucial in any relationship. Demand honesty.
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Thanks for sharing! :-)
1 person likes this
@gr8life (6253)
• Malaysia
4 Apr 09
Hello mermaidivy, I don't bother what people want to comment about me but I will take note of it. Like you, the one that can hurt me is my husband. If he says something bad about me, I will definitely feel different. I won't take it easily and will try my best to over come that problem.
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Thanks for sharing! :-)
• Philippines
4 Apr 09
commenting on the way I look makes me more self-conscious but i also see it as a good criticism for me to step up and change something on the way i look ..
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Depends on who commenting on me I guess... Thanks for sharing! :-)
@ajithlal (14569)
• India
4 Apr 09
I had chicken pox when I was young and my face was covered with lots of scars at that time and I had lots of pimples in my face at that time. I look like a beast at that time and most kids doesn't like to sit near me and some kids used to tease me. I think that taught me a lot and I never used to tease others or commented others after I grow up and when all the scars and pimples vanished. I think it is very bad to pass negative comments on a person's physical appearance.
@mermaidivy (15412)
• United States
6 Apr 09
Yes, that would be very bad to comment on somebody's appearance like that. very disrespectful. Thanks for sharing! :-)