Who rules in yours - the toddlers or the parents?

@iskayz (5422)
Philippines
April 9, 2009 7:40am CST
Hi everyone! One day I was watching the TV and heard of a good tip about disciplining toddlers. Experts say that it’s the kids that need to adjust in the house with the adults and not the adults adjusting to the kids. They say we don’t really have to baby proof our house, hiding all breakable things and giving freedom for the kids to run and play inside the house, especially in the living room. We should only hide sharp objects that could hurt them. It is much better if we let things the way we want our stuffs as it is or how we want our living room to look like. Let the kids get used to how things are placed inside the house and the adults should only guide them how to move without breaking things. Let them develop proper motor movements. It is also suggested that we don’t have to tell them not to touch this and that. Experts suggests to let the kids be, how they are inside the house and only remind them not to touch things they’re not suppose to if and only they try to touch it. They will learn to behave that way without often telling them to be behaved. As I watched the program I remember how I took care of my twin youngest brothers. We never really baby proof our house except for sharp objects that could hurt them. We also covered electrical outlets with plastic coverings that are available at stores. But other than that, we never hid most of the stuffs in the house. I remember our neighbor saluting us cause we have twins and the house still looks fine. What about in your house? Do you or did you baby proofed your house? Can kids be trained using what the experts say or there are kids that are really just stubborn and hard to control. How do you train your kids to behave well? Please do share!
2 people like this
7 responses
@riyasam (16578)
• India
9 Apr 09
that was very good advice.i have not baby proofed my home,just tried myself to be cautious so that the kids dont get hurt by any objects that can hurt them.the breakable objects we try to keep it out of their way till they understand that they are not supposed to play with it.
2 people like this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
I think kids around 2 years old can somehow understand well what things not to touch. Happy posting!
1 person likes this
@Raven7317 (693)
• United States
10 Apr 09
We must have listened to the same expert because we always held that "the baby will fit into our lives, not the other way around." Everyone thought we were being selfish, unrealistic, mean... everyone thought we didn't know what we were talking about! We got the "Oh, you'll see!" Now, our son is 3 1/2 and we've stuck to this point. Our son is very well behaved and happy. We have friends that have young children and they completely lost their lives when they had kids! They LIVE based on the kid's meals and nap schedules! They can't bring their kids into other people's homes because they didn't teach the kids how to behave. They won't bring their kids into certain areas of stores (toy dept) because they don't know how to say "NO." They won't go more than a 30 minutes drive away from home because the kids need to sleep/eat at certain times... It's annoying to be friends with them at this point! I'm not saying that we give NO consideration to our son and his needs, but we don't panic if we have to change things around either. We did babyproof our house because one of our biggest things was we wanted to be able to leave our son in a room for a while, alone, so that he would learn to entertain himself and gain independence. So his rooms are completely baby safe and I have no fears of him getting into anything because there isn't anything in there that can hurt him. As far as the rest of the house, we put plug guards and cabinet locks. We didn't remove breakables from where he could reach, we just taught him how to handle or not to handle at all. We have had to adjust some things now because some of what we did when he was little is backfiring now that he's older, but for the most part, he's a very well behaved little guy and HE fit into OUR lives just perfectly!
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Wow.. Now that is an example of a good parenting to me!! You know sometimes its the parents' problem that's why kids are being stubborn and hard to manage. I think parents especially mothers should be unbending most of the times to avoid spoiling their kids. They should train them starting from childhood so they will grow up a responsible adult. Kids become what they have been told when they were still young. I also like what you said, "the baby will fit into our lives, not the other way around". It can be a good motivation for those starting moms and dads. Happy posting!
@smartjack (521)
• India
10 Apr 09
babies are very delicate and cannot adjust as per its surroundings.it wont bother about the things that are there at your place, no matter if there are delicate or sharp objects around
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Hi! You know for me babies are much easier to handle than kids learning to walk and run by themselves. Babies just stays behaved I think hehe. I also agree with you that babies are delicate and has no sense about their surroundings but babies usually stay in their cribs until they learn to walk and learn to be naughty hehe. Happy posting!
• China
10 Apr 09
Yes, I think the article introduces the right discussions, I agree whit it, but I think when we using those things to teach our kids, we must know something else. when the kids are under 2 years old, even 3 years, their understanding is very low, though we remind them much time ,they would not remember, so i think the method suits for bigger kids, not for smaller kids, we should use other methods such as hiding more things to proof them.
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Hi! Yeah, the tips might not be applicable for younger kids but I think for 2 years, yes it can be. Just put a little hard work in training the them. Starting at the age of 2 kids can already understand especially if we don't baby-talk them and treat them as kids. It could be hard but I believe it's possible. Ciao!
@CJscott (4184)
• Canada
9 Apr 09
I just let the little munchkin run rampant. If he gets hurt, he will know what not to do next time. Don't get me wrong here though, hurt is one thing, injured is quite another. But nothing we have lying around is likely to injure the little brat. Brat he is indeed. I don't give into his whims, but for the life of me I can't seem to get his mother to understand why it isn't a good idea, and for her part she will argue tooth and nail that she doesn't give in. I actually find it quite amusing. He pretty much leaves everything that isn't "his" alone, except when he wants to play, then everything you are touching is a toy, including the keyboard, and what with all the one button apps, and the sliding tray, it can get rather fun at times.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Hehehe I can imagine your little brat running around your house and still looking cute and funny. When I took care of my youngest brothers I also let them be. Whatever they like to do I let them but if they get hurt that's the time I tell them to stop. Ciao!
• United States
9 Apr 09
I didn't really baby-proof my house that much. I did put a lock on the fridge because my son kept trying to eat the chocolate syrup, and I put locks on the cabinets so he couldn't get to the animal food or the cleaning supplies, and I put plastic covers on the outlets (one time he managed to shock himself but I never did figure out how) but other than that I didn't do much. I expect him by now (he's two and a half) to know what he is and isn't allowed to touch, and as he was growing I'd tell him if he'd grab something that wasn't his. That's how I would train him-I'd say, "That's not yours. You have a whole toy box to play with. Don't play with Mommy's things or I'll take your trucks." Maybe not the nicest way to be, but he gets irate when the cats or anyone touches his trucks. So I'd let him know he has to be respectful of other people's stuff like we are with his stuff.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
10 Apr 09
Hey I think that's a good way of training your child how to respect others' stuffs. I don't think you're scaring him at all too. It's just the easiest how to make him understand not to take someone else's things. I have a nephew and his about the same age as your son. He's starting to be a bit stubborn. He likes to play on things that's not his. His a bit hard to manage cause his nanny takes care of him and I think she spoiled him a little bit. Happy posting!
• United States
9 Apr 09
I don't bend over backwards every time my daughter starts crying. She's not quite 1 yet but all children need to learn to self soothe or they are going to be in for a rude awakening when they get older. If she cries because she doesn't want to go to sleep, we'll let her cry. She'll eventually give up and go to bed. We're not going to give in to her every time she wants something. I don't need to be raising a diva pricess who expects to be carried everywhere and handed everything she ever wants. As for baby proofing, we do some of it. I don't go around and nail all my cabines shut and strap pillows all over her body to prevent a bruise or a scrape. The townhome we're in already had those plastic tabs on the cabinet doors that keep kids from getting in them, but if they weren't there, we'd likely buy one or two sets and keep the cabinets under the sinks locked as that's where we keep our cleaning products. We do have a baby gate at the top of the stairs we use. Our DD likes to toddle around while we're upstairs in our room or right before she goes to bed and we don't want her falling down 15 steps. But we haven't gone around and started hiding stuff she could break. She knows by now enough what she's supposed to touch and what she's not and she does respond to her name and us telling her no if she touches something she's not supposed to.
1 person likes this
@iskayz (5422)
• Philippines
9 Apr 09
Well I salute you for not spoiling your child. I think it is a good start not to give in whenever she cries. Letting her soothe herself can make your child independent even at a young age. I remember we did put baby gate in our house. Those gadgets are just remarkable. We live on the third floor beside the stairs and so we had to put a baby gate on our front door. It may not look very nice but visitors understand that we have toddlers. Happy posting!
1 person likes this