bad lover

@rocketsky (1014)
China
April 14, 2009 9:35pm CST
I always listen to everything he said ,follow all orders he made , but he never show respect to me at all ,i know he love me ,but I dont like a love like this . what should i do ?
2 people like this
9 responses
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
15 Apr 09
If you have done all you can to please him and he doesn't seem pleased then maybe you should try and express the things that please you. Men want to know what you like. Sometimes their pleasure rests within yours. Easily guide him as to what pleases you and don't be shy. He is your lover. It's ok and he will enjoy your exploring. He's your husband and these things are acceptable.
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27565)
• United States
15 Apr 09
Of course no one should be made to feel inferior. Nor should anyone be anywhere that they don't want to be. If she's not happy then yes...leave..but us telling her to do so will not make it happen and it doesn't help to make her feel better about herself by telling her to go. That's a choice she'll have to make. I do agree that expressing opinions and needs are the way to go.
@srganesh (6349)
• India
15 Apr 09
So,he likes to dominate you and take you for granted.It is good for you get out of the relation if you feel hurt by his behaviour.Or if you love him still,then you have to lead a life of an unhappy married women.Just liking and hating the same person,living on complaints.That will be very tedious.So,decide whether you really want him or not.Cheers!
• Philippines
15 Apr 09
The questions is "does he really love because if he did, he will give you freedom to choose to follow his orders or not, to listen to him or not". Your like a slave. If i were you, i will talk to him and tell him what i feel about the whole situation. if after that he still do it then thats it. IT'S OVER.
• Canada
15 Apr 09
You need to speak up and tell him. If you don't you will have problems later on. I never spoke up with my ex and I have been traumatized from this to an extent that i think everyone is like that. Then I started saying things with my new man (well not so new anymore) and realized that their is someone who respects me not only in bed but out of bed as well. So please for your sake speak up or it won't stop and he will continue doing this to you.
1 person likes this
@csrobins (1125)
• United States
15 Apr 09
okay girl, you never let yourself have a voice! You never stood up to yourself to show him you demand respect. You have to love yourself before you can love someone else. If you draw boundaries with what you will and will not do to him with your dignity and well being in mind, you will get teh respect and a whole lot more of a lot of stuff. But he still shound't treat you that way, you need to find a better guy, and look out for yourself first.
• United States
15 Apr 09
If this person loves you he would respect you. But one thing is a person has to show the person they will accept nothing less than respect. I would let him know that he should be more respectful. I would talk to him and tell him how you feel. Maybe he doesn't realize that this is how you feel. That the things he is doing make you feel that he doesn't respect you.
@rocketsky (1014)
• China
15 Apr 09
i want him to know this ,but he always be himself and never pay attention to hat ai said to him .i am losing my patience to him
1 person likes this
• United States
15 Apr 09
It sounds like he is walking over you and that is not a good thing in a relationship. If he doesn't listen to you when you are telling him how you feel than he doesn't deserve you. You deserve to be treated with respect.
• Philippines
15 Apr 09
If he thinks that he is forgetting something about respect, then show it to him, let him know that you are also a human being, with emotions and all, and by what he is doing is hurting you so speak up and voice it out to him. It is unfair if you will just allow him to do that to you, don't spoil him like a baby because you just have to follow his very desire, every needs. Try to stand firm on what you believe as a person. When you say you love a person, you also respect him and care for him. If you think you don't see these things to your hubby , and it is just you who do that, then that is not called love but selfishness since he focuses only on his own pleasure, and not yours.
• Philippines
15 Apr 09
Try to talk to him and tell him how you feel. Tell him you dont like the way he is to you. You love him that's why you follow everything he said to you. But still let him know that you need respect and you want to feel respect from him. Tell him how much you love him, ask him if he loves you and if he answer yes ask him to prove it to you by showing you some respect. Make sure you dont argue with him just talk to him in a nice way, in a calm matter. Make sure also that you tell him first how much you love him and how happy you are being with him. If after that he still didnt change i guess you have to find someone else who will respect you as a woman.
• Philippines
15 Apr 09
you know what you need to do, you dont even need to ask anybody else