Sinner's Signs
By sconibear
@sconibear (8016)
United States
April 20, 2009 9:07am CST
i was watching Bill Engval doing his stand up comedy and was having a good laugh at him doing his "here's your sign" routine.
if you don't know about Bill Engval, he's a comedian here in the U.S. who is probably best known for giving out "STUPID" signs.........he'll describe somebody doing something completely moronic and end it by saying "here's your sign"
so i got to thinking about a "sinner's sign" so all "good christians" can know all the wicked people in the world and avoid them like the plaque and point their fingers at them and judge them.
"Man, we're going to make a killing with our christian book store"
THOU SHALL NOT KILL!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
"i really stole her heart"
THOU SHALL NOT STEAL!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
"that Tammy Faye Baker is sooooooooo hot with all that mascara on"
THOU SHALL NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S WIFE!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
"hey Fred.......nice self cleaning solar powered lawn mower.....i want one of those.
THOU SHALL NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S GOODS!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
"i got tickets for Superbowl Sunday right on the 50 yard line........i won't miss that for the world!!!"
REMEMBER TO KEEP HOLY THE SABBATH!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
(overheard from an hourly motel room "YES!!! OH GOD!!! OOOOOOOOOOH GOD YES YES!!!!!"
THOU SHALL NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN VAIN!!! HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
so to all you people that take the bible literally and believe it word for word,
better watch what you say...........watch what you think too, remember god's a hypnotist/mindreader and knows what you're thinking at ALL TIMES.............heck you might want to just stay in bed........better safe than sorry.
and yes, god knows what you're thinking of me right now............HERE'S YOUR SINNER SIGN!!!
5 people like this
12 responses
@sconibear (8016)
• United States
20 Apr 09
that's great........i've got quite the sign collection going on already. 
1 person likes this
@dawnald (85130)
• Shingle Springs, California
22 Apr 09
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
HERE IS YOUR HYPOCRITE SIGN. lol
@sconibear (8016)
• United States
22 Apr 09
thanks..............here's your stone. 
1 person likes this
@uath13 (8192)
• United States
20 Apr 09
Wait, isn't sloth a sin? Staying in bed...here's your sinner sign.
@sconibear (8016)
• United States
20 Apr 09
*puts sinner sign for sloth next to sinner signs for gluttony and lust*
@mummymo (23706)
•
26 Apr 09
PMPL You know what sconi you really made me laugh with this! It is so spot on for many so called Christians which is also really sad, as a Christian myself! I believe that we are all sinners and anyone who says they never have in thought , word or deed I would not believe! Some of us Christians actually think that it is more about trying to follow the example of Christ and spreading love, respect and tolerance around rather than follow exactly the word in a bible that has been translated by mankind so many times over that no one knows how many changes have occured! xxxx
@Little_Stormy (6883)
• United States
20 Apr 09
I think signs are important.. I wouldn't have ran my car over a cliff if I had read the detour sign instead of the sign that said I can now get two pizza's for the price of one at pizza shack!
*gives bear a sign that says "feed me! I'm always hungry!"*
@sconibear (8016)
• United States
20 Apr 09
*proudly nails new sign over the "DO NOT FEED THE BEAR!!!" sign.
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
20 Apr 09
Hey sconi! I love Bill Engval! He is sooooo funny! Haven't
seen him in quite a while! Used to see him with Foxworthy!
They was another guy too! Forget his name! The three of them
were a riot! I would laugh my azz off! Those red necks! I
guess you like that type of humor too! The first time I saw
the I didn't understand what the hell they were saying after
every joke! I couldn't figure out that "Here's your sign"
thing! But, it was sure funny! I hope they show some more
of those guys together! Thanks for more funnies! I wish
you and missy lived closer! We could have such a great time
hangin' out! And myklj too! That would be the ultimate party!
@sconibear (8016)
• United States
20 Apr 09
there was 4 of them.........Jeff Foxworthy, Bill Engval, Ron White, and Larry The Cable Guy.
@mtdewgurl74 (18151)
• United States
21 Apr 09
Becky accepts sign and hangs head..blushes..Sorry,I didn't know I was getting that loud..but if I stay in bed I might end up with a few more here's your sinner signs..lol
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
23 Apr 09
*falls over in a fit of giggles* omg that is too freakin funny!! I'm gonna need to rent a storage space for the collection of sinner signs that I got goin on LOL
@moonlitmagikchild (22181)
• United States
22 Apr 09
well if they stayed in bed wouldnt that be sloth which is against the bible too! lol
so you cant do anything with out sinning but you cant do nothing with out it being sinning.. lovely eh?
@neerajpandey_13 (1765)
• India
21 Apr 09
The thing which you are saying is very easy in saying but is you know how difficult it is to follow all these things. Overall we want to survive in this world.
