Is a woman required to know.....???

United States
April 24, 2009 1:17pm CST
What I would like to talk about today is a pretty touchy subject, but I can't help but ask. Should woman be required to identify the father of her children?? So many talk shows lately have had those "who's your baby's daddy?" shows. My question is: should a woman be required--by law--to disclose the birth father of her children?? ....If only for the sake of the children?? Okay....scenerio time: A woman gets pregnant. She hopes that her boyfriend is the father but there is "this one guy". After taking a test, they find that the boyfriend is NOT Daddy. Now,...... Should this woman be required--by law--to identify this other man. Is it ok for a woman to simply leave that spot blank on the birth certificate?? Should the law get involved?? What do you think??
3 people like this
12 responses
@apples99 (6564)
• United States
25 Apr 09
I dont know if a woman should be required by law to identify the father of her child, but I think that the child should know who there father is, and that also docters should know who the childs biological father is, so in case of any serious medical conditions with the child, they can know what the family medical history is so that the docters can better treat the child, but as for making it a legal requirement I'm really not sure if it should be.
• United States
25 Apr 09
You raise an excellent point apples99!! Learning the medical history of biological parents can be helpful when preventing any disease the child may be predesposed to. For example, some types of cancers run through families, as well as other diseases, like diabetes and heart disease.
@maezee (32250)
• United States
24 Apr 09
All it would take for them to find out is one little DNA test, and yes! I think that EVERYONE who is in doubt should have PROOF of who's the biological father! If they have ANY little trace of doubt, that is. The crazy thing is that you could pretty much pick ANYONE to fill in that "father" section on a birth certificate - and no proof is necessary unless someone tries to fight you in court about it. I think a woman SHOULD be required by law. I've been watching day-time talk shows a lot now that my spring semester of school has ended - and it causes SO much pain for everyone involved! For the guy who thinks he's a dad - he's usually REALLY upset to learn that he's actually NOT, and the guy who actually IS the dad most likely doesn't want anything to do with the kid, and the girl is broken up about it..Not to mention the child! (Hopefully at this stage, though, they're at a too early age to remember..But still). I mean, I don't necessarily think that blood tests should be given to EVERY couple having a child, but could we maybe only make promiscuous mommys-to-be do it? . Ok, that might not be fair..
• United States
24 Apr 09
I agree! I think woman are ethically responsible to identify the father of thier children. If only for the sake of the kids!! It is really wild how these issues are handled. You are exactly right when you say that any man can sign that birthcertificate.... Without question or proof. As I said before, I can understand and sympathize with woman who have found themselves in this unfortunate situation. But, if only to be true to her children... I think one day, she has to come clean. I know this girl who has a baby to one of my friends. She is a very sweet girl and an excellent mommy! The thing is, they concieved this baby when they were 15! My friend, the father, was ordered by her parents to stay away.... And let me tell you what... I know these people and they meant what they said. Now the little girl has grown up all her life thinking that this other man is her father. He is a great guy and he has put his entire life into giving those two a comfortable life. He deserves the "Dad" title. But the little girl is turning twelve and my friend--the little girl's father--wants to see her now. It so complicated and I was just wondering what other MyLotters felt about it...
@jkatmaou (195)
• Philippines
25 Apr 09
well, its really up to the woman if she wants to identify the father of her child. she should not be required by law, but she is ethically responsible to at least have a certain answer if her child does ask her one day. not all children want to know what happened or who their fathers are. but for the most part, if they demand the truth, i think its our responsibility to provide it.
@tashanda (58)
• United States
25 Apr 09
I think it should be left up to the woman, but she should know for sure who the father for medical reasons. Also a woman is only required to give hs name when she applies for benefits from the state.Why, because that is how they keep the financial responsibility off of the taxpayers, the father pays back every dime that the state puts out for his child on top of his child support payments. He also pays for the DNA test once it has been proven that he is the father.
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
25 Apr 09
I think it is only fair for the woman to make known the real person who impregnate her and be written as the father of the child in the birth cert. In rare cases, a lot of legal issues are involved if no men is going to own up and this will entail a long case of DNA tests etc. I don't know in other countries but my country is not too strict on the requirements and they have a special birth cert for single mom where the father's identity is left blank and the child eventually carries the mother's surname.
• United States
25 Apr 09
I think I have a combination of different beliefs when it comes to this matter. I think that it is a women's responsibility to know who the father of her child is. For one reason I think health issues should matter. You need to have some idea of where your child comes from. Who knows what they can inheriate in their genes. Not to mention, there are some women out there that only want to accuse or hunt down the "supposely" baby's daddy just for some kind of financial stability. Sure, raising a child is not free, but when you live off welfare for the whole 18 years of your child's life, it becomes everyone's business, especially to the taxpayers pockets. I think that a DNA test should be confirmed first before a name is to be put on a birth certificate, if the paternity is questionable. But then again, there comes the money situation again. But I think it is a woman's responsibility to inform the person or person(s) of whom the biological father could be. And if the child's biological parents are involved with each other or not, it is BOTH parent's obligation to support the child. But by all means, if one parent wants to give up their rights of becoming this child's sole provider, then they have that choice as well. But back to the real subject. The child should have the right to know where they came from in case, later in life, they end up meeting one of their siblings on accident or purpose. There are so many reasons to do or not to identify the child's biological parents. Your right, this can be a pretty touchy subject.
@cobra1368 (704)
• United States
25 Apr 09
IMO, it is none of the law's business who the father of every child in America is. All decisions regarding a child should lie with the mother first, and the father second, if he is in the picture. If the situation is such that she chooses to leave him out and he doesn't know he's got a kid, so be it. What he doesn't know won't hurt him. Should the child seek to find his/her biological father at some point, that is fine too, they should be allowed to do that. But that doesn't mean that the mother should be required by law to disclose that information. In some cases, the woman does not know who the father is. She very well can't list a father if she has several men to choose from.
@meandmy3 (2229)
• United States
25 Apr 09
No the law should not get involved. Just imagine the nightmare in paperwork it would be. It is very sad that there are so many women who have no clue who their babies daddies are, but that is the society we live in and I have a feeling it is going to continue to get worse as time goes by. Do I think some of these shows are stageed and the mom is not being truthful about who the father is, yes they want the free trip to New York or Chicago and they do not care how much of a fool they make of themselves.
@celticeagle (118231)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Apr 09
With the Women's Movement in full swing these days and all I really doubt that that needs to be an issue. Women who get artificially incemenated don't seem to have that probem. If they make it an issue then it is, and they don't need to. A man is just the other part of the needed components. [Did I just say that?] But, it is true. The law may get involved if the man wants a voice but only then I would think.
@411space (55)
• United States
24 Apr 09
it really is up to the woman..personally i would leave it blank.
@jellymonty (2358)
24 Apr 09
Well I dont think the law should be involved but I think every woman has to identify the father of her children. Her Children deserve to know who their daddy is! If she has been two timing her partner then that is her problem but she cannot deny that right to her children or even the father of the children as he too deserves to know that they are his. It's got nothing to do with the law. If at one point she doesnt know the father of her kids then thats when DNA test are there to help identify the dad but I dont see any point of the law being involved. It all depends on the woman herself.. Its just a natural thing to do.. The law is burdened with other laws so This can be handled privately..
• United States
24 Apr 09
I think that the father needs to know that he has a child for one reason only - it is his child as well. A woman shouldn't be able to hide a child from the father just because she doesn't want to be known as the woman sleeping around with someone that isn't her boyfriend/husband. There are consequences to the actions and perhaps the consequence is raising a child with a man that you were never dating etc. But seriously - that guy was involved with making the child so why shouldn't be know? I don't see how anyone could say the dad has no right to a child. Seriously - if you were a male would you want to know if you had a child out there? Think about it from the other perspective. I have no sympathy for women who sleep with multiple men.