Have you been lucky enough to marry your love?

marrying the person you love is the best thing to  - Marrying the person you love is the best thing to happen.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
India
April 29, 2009 5:12am CST
We all fall in love but not all are lucky enough to get to live with that person life long. Sometimes we love one person but have to marry another, sometimes we marry the person our family choose for us, sometimes you marry and then fall in love and sometimes the person we love doesn't share the same feeling! Did you get to marry the person you had loved? Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it.
16 people like this
49 responses
@srganesh (6348)
• India
29 Apr 09
No!I am unlucky to get my lover to be my wife.Those who get married like that are enviable people for me.But it is unfortunate for love married couples to get their relation broken,in many cases.In that case,I even think,it will be better to love and get lost.LOL!Cheers!
2 people like this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
Thanks for the funny take! LOL Seriously, I think, breaking up of any relationship is most sad but that happens. Even when you marry the person your family choose for it may happen. It may also happen when you marry your love. Its unfortunate. Let's not talk that here. If I am not wrong you did marry the person you love. Great!
3 people like this
@srganesh (6348)
• India
29 Apr 09
I am sorry to say,you misunderstand.My love failed and I have married another girl which is an arranged marriage.
• China
29 Apr 09
I love him,but i know maybe he will not love me,but i still wait for him. i could not forget him . i hope one day he understand.
@apsara60 (6612)
• Israel
30 Apr 09
Dear Mimpi, How are you. I liked you new avatar. Does that mean now you are giving green signal..., just joking dear. Well, in my case, I was not allowed to love anybody before marriage.....mine was an arranged marriage. My family chose a boy for me and got me married, and told me that now I was allowed to love and love only this person.....and that is what I did, as I was such dump headed stupid immatured object living unnecessarily on this earth...... Well, I am happy with my husband today, no complains. We do love each other a lot, there is no doubt about it. As you know there are so many cases where though people marry their loved one's yet their marriage fails.......so there is nothing sure about love.....anything can happen. Two lover can fail, two strangers can be lovers forever and ever.........
2 people like this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
There is no hard and fast rule to make it work. Its also seen two people loving each other, getting married for life and happily so. And also there are cases of being single together. You never know! I am glad that you two are greatly in love for each other. Things get smoother and lovelier when you know someone is there waiting for you. I wish you luck! And coming to my avatar, it was for he Earth day but now still there on demand. will change it original though.
1 person likes this
@mayka123 (11068)
• India
29 Apr 09
Mine was a love marriage.....sad it lasted only 12 years.....It is nice to be able to marry the person you love......but it does not happen always....
2 people like this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
I a sorry dear. You had told me and I really salute you for your strength to fight the odds one after the other. Blessed be.
2 people like this
@alokn99 (5717)
• India
29 Apr 09
I have always believed that i would only marry the person i love. It's that or remain the way i am. I have not allowed my family to choose someone for me, for i always had the opinion that this a choice and decision that i would make and be responsible for. I have a few friends who have been lucky enough to marry thier love and it feels nice listening to thier story and how they went about getting married.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
29 Apr 09
And now, have you or have you not Alok?
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
Even I feel that way. I can only marry the person I am in love or else not marry at all. How can I just marry jut because we have to! And who decides for that? I have friends who have married each other and their journey has been fantastic and little weird also. When we look back and transfigure those stories it seems like great fun.
3 people like this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
29 Apr 09
This comment is for you mimpi--that poor man who asked for your hand-you heartlessly turned him downmay be love would have blossomed.Now, what is wrong with us all?
1 person likes this
@Annmac (950)
30 Apr 09
I fell in love several times but 'time' showed I didn't 'love' them or they didn't 'love' me. That's why relationships break up! Unless it's an arranged or forced marriage I don't see why you'd marry a man you didn't think you loved! I was 'lucky' in that I waited to be sure I could live with the man I loved. We both knew that we'd have to make compromises and adjustments as time went by, but on all the important things we were compatible. We both felt that for better or worse marriage was for life. We knew each other for several years before we got together as a couple and already had a lot in common. Perhaps that helped the luck a bit. I was married for over 38 years to my best friend so I suppose you'd consider it 'lucky' but that luck needed a bit of work or help now and again. He got to live with his love life long, sadly I'm not that lucky.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
That's so well said and I agree ttally. It's a two way process and we need to nourish it from time to time. It doesn't work when one sided. Its indeed a delicate thing.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
21 May 09
So true!
@bamrahkirti (1819)
• India
29 Apr 09
I fell in love with a person when i was 21,but thing just went beyond my control and i could not get the person as my life partner because firstly his parents were adamant about the marriage but when they approached us ,my parents out of ego and hurt rejected the proposal. I got married when i was 29 years of age and pretty much mature,calm and composed.It is an arranged marriage and we hardly had a few days to know each other.But i have been very lucky in this regard.My husband is very sensitive,calm and relaxed person and i just love his attitude for life.He is the simplest at his heart and i love him.Each day is a new experience for us. We are with the grace of God going great and hope that our relationship will become stronger day by day. Yes i can say i love him[i][/i][u][/u]
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
Hi Bamra! Hope the little angel is doing fine now and you are good too. I a so glad to read through this and I must thanks you for being so candid and transparent. I am glad that you have married someone who is a great human and you love him very much. May you all have a blessed life. Hugs.
3 people like this
• India
29 Apr 09
Thanks Mimpi. My darling is doing fine and again back to his mischievous deeds.Its is purely a bliss to watch a child performing all those naughty and cute things. I just poured out my heat and i am feeling very relaxed that i have shared the incident of my life with a good friend. Thanks for your friendship.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
That's so sweet of him. Its a bliss indeed to watch the kids play, laugh, grow. And thanks so much dear for your friendship as well. Take care in this heat.
2 people like this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
29 Apr 09
I did not get this 'measles' mimpi because I was vaccinated against it by my upbringing.The answer would get very long and repetitive but if you feel inclined and have the time pop in and read Deepak's discussion on flirting http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1456445.aspx--this would give you an idea about my upbringing.Secondly, you can also know more about me and my family if you read the following discussion by elsoft.[if i have not written to you already].There are very few details left to fill in now.Shall write more in a personal mail and send you a photograph.There is one on my blog that is decent but slightlty unclear.Had started drafting a mail, but for the past two days , I have been otherwise occupied . http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/1966260.aspx How are things with you?
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
I think there is nothing wrong in falling in love and that has little to do with our culture and upbringing. Being in love is the most beautiful thing to happen and as long as we are not into immoral activities (as in making love with a married person, or cheating on our partners), I think nothing bad with it. Will check the discussions Kala and awaiting your mail and would like to know what keeps you busy these days. Went through some of your articles in AC. They reflect a talented, simple, thoughtful and a beautiful mind of a most amazing lady. Thanks for your participation in mimpidreams.
2 people like this
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
29 Apr 09
Thanks for those encouraging words.As I had written you are one cheerleader like my son.Coming to the discussion, it does have a lot to do with upbringing mimpi.When we are very devoted to parents, and we have had a conservative upbringing, there is always a conscious desire not to displease our parents.And if we know that they would choose our partner for us and that it would be frowned upon by society if we are to do it by ourselves, it is a mater of family prestige etc..,[they instil this in us from young --that is why I referred to Deepak's discussion for you]then this definitely plays a part, more prevalent in our times.THere may be nothing wrong [moreso in these days and age where it is safer at times for the higly informed ,sensible youngsters to make their choice--that is what our Alok wants to do].People with conditioned upbringing would fight against this feeling and would not allow themselves [this is for modern people/for us it was considered blasphemy--ask your mom -I am sure it is an arranged marriage]
@onlydia (2808)
• United States
29 Apr 09
Well, I thought I was in love but wasn't. As once we moved in with each other he wasn't the same man. He didn't beat me but the things he said sometimes were unreal. He was never there for me when I needed him. In the hospital wasn't there. went out and got drunk I was trying not to die. So the man I did love ran off with a younger woman. You have a good day. Your friend onlydia
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
That's sad! My heart goes out to you dear. Hope you have found your soul mate now. Blessed be.
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17690)
• United States
29 Apr 09
Hi mimpi! I love your comparison to having the measles! I never did marry the love of my life. He was unfortunately for me, already married. We shouldn't have been together at all to begin with. He was having problems in his marriage, but he told me that he would never leave his wife because where he came from in Ireland and with his family background that would never happen. We did fall in love, but that was all. We were seeing each other for ten years! It took me a very long time to get over him! I actually saw him for the first time last year! I ran into him and we talked! It was nice, but the feelings for me, thankfully were buried! We are still friends, but that is all!
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
Sometimes love is above logic and unrequited love has its own charm. The hurts, pains are numbing but we move on. we have to in life. We can never forget though.
• China
29 Apr 09
I haven't married anybody,but I love sb. I want to marry him later
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
29 Apr 09
May your dream come true!
1 person likes this
@Roseo8 (2947)
• India
30 Apr 09
Hi Mimpi I was brought up in a conservative family,and married the person my parents chose.......Now ,after looking at the way people are falling in and out of love,and with marriages failing at the drop of a hat,I am sure glad,I let my parents chose my life partner for me..For as a teenager,I was starry eyed and very romantic and full of Mills and Boon romances,and my marriage to a strange guy put an abrupt end to my dreams and I landed with both my feet steadily on the ground.Looking back I am sure if given choice I would have fallen head over heals in love with the first person who made a pass at me,and would have regretted it for ever....I feel my parents have made a wise choice in selecting my life partner.......Infact he is just the opposite of me........Very unromantic and down to earth,and we make a sane stable pair...........
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
I am very happy for you Mithra. Marriage, I feel, is unpredictable and we never know what's going to work and when! There are innumerable cases where love marriages have worked like anything. I feel, its always better to know the person whom you are going to live your life forever with.
2 people like this
@Roseo8 (2947)
• India
19 May 09
well it works very well the other way too Mimpi.............Infact its equally exiciting to live your whole life with your partner and get to know and adjuct to each other after marriage too....perhaps it may appear old fashioned....but it works more than love marriages too.....
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
I appreciate your thoughts. Only a small correction, its NOT old fashioned. It's more like abiding by our customs and culture. Nothing wrong in it, if it works. We cannot measure in terms of workability factors though. Both have chances equal to being successful. Nothing bad in either and I have great deal of respect for people who marries the person their parents decide for them.
2 people like this
@UK_Shree (3604)
19 May 09
I am not married yet, but will be getting married quite soon. I am happy to say that I will be getting married to somebody that I love so much. And luckily my family are in love with my partner too! I know I am so lucky to be in this situation. I know that not everyone is fated to marry the person they love and I do understand that in some cultures people do marry due to pressures from family. My advice is that although you cannot fall in love with someone the family suggests, it is important to have chemistry as every relationship needs a spark of some sort.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
21 May 09
I really appreciate that Shree. I wish you more love, luck and a beautiful life ahead.
@UK_Shree (3604)
21 May 09
Thanks! x
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
23 May 09
You are welcome.
@riyasam (16574)
• India
29 Apr 09
we really come from very conservative family,they dont beleive in love marraiges but luckily for me ,i fell in love with a boy whose parents where family friends of mine.so there was a proper proposal and engagement,nobody even realised that we were in love.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
29 Apr 09
It has worked out well for you riyasam and that is great! all the best!
1 person likes this
@riyasam (16574)
• India
30 Apr 09
thankyou and all the best to you too.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
18 May 09
That's good to know. That's why they say that marriages are made in heaven. Blessed be.
@balasri (26553)
• India
19 May 09
And you know pretty well about he person I married Mimpi.It was love then now and forever.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
I know. I do. Yes I do. You two are awesome! And I really believe that knots are are in heaven and in your case God has made extra effort. Al my luck and prayers for you.
@balasri (26553)
• India
19 May 09
I love you for that Mimpi.
@csrobins (1125)
• United States
30 Apr 09
I’m not married, but I will not marry unless it is for love. I don’t get to marry unless it is for love actually. In eth US many people don’t get married because it is not top priority. No one chooses anyone for us and many times no one comes along so you could potentially stay single for the rest of your life…so I guess some people get luck-or unlucky enough to not get the measles haha
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
19 May 09
But I feel everyone falls in love even if its for a short period of time...
@csrobins (1125)
• United States
22 May 09
I hope that is true
@dpk262006 (56599)
• Delhi, India
30 Apr 09
Hi! Mimpi! Your question is very tricky one.......LOL! If one says that he/she was not lucky enough to marry her/his love, it means that there was someone with whom he/she could not marry and he/was in love with that person. Ours was an arranged marriage and I did not know my better half earlier (incidentally we studied in the same college, she was junior to me). You may say that it is a case where you marry first and then fall in love with your partner. Interestingly, many dear friends here on mylot have asked this question to me, whether mine was a love marriage? (I cannot think about the likely reasons for asking this question....LOL!).
@dpk262006 (56599)
• Delhi, India
19 May 09
Yes, you can say so that our parents would have felt relieved when we got married. I also support the fact that arranged marriages do work, provided at least one of the partners is ready to 'adjust' and if both the partners can adjust, then it is all the more good. Many Thanks for your wishes.
@haiershen (1084)
• China
17 Jun 09
i always belived that i would be married with somebody whom is i fall in love with.i don't image that if both them don't love each other, how to live for ever?so,i still waiting and finding my love, hope he would be appeared within this year.good luck and have a nice day!
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
23 Jun 09
I appreciate and wish you luck!
@larish (2195)
• Philippines
23 May 09
Yes, I am married to the one I love and to the one I cannot live my life without. I am happy that I marry the right person at the right time.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
25 May 09
So good to know this Larish. I wish you both a very happy married life forever.
@krajibg (11936)
• Guwahati, India
19 May 09
Hi, Mimpi. When I was in college I was in love with a girl and our love lasted for seven years but that did not materialize into marriage and I have settled with somebody else. But now with a son of high IQ I am happy a lot.
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
21 May 09
I did saw your wife's picture (j the second page of this discussion). You two look great together. I am glad that you have an adorable son. Have a wonderful life, Rajib.
@anonymili (3138)
19 May 09
I met my first hubby when I was 18, married him when I was 25 and we divorced a few years later. The wonderful sweetheart that I'm married now I've been with for 7 years and happily married for 5. I can't imagine living my life without him so I would say I'm very lucky to be married to someone I love so much and who loves me so much. I have to pinch myself sometimes to see if I really am lucky enough to have someone who worships me so much and whom I can't imagine not having in my life! x
@mimpi1911 (25479)
• India
21 May 09
I am so happy for you dear. you are such a sweet person. how can not anyone love you and care for you!