Guys: Do you prefer a virgin over a non-virgin when it comes to marriage?

@daliaj (5689)
India
May 11, 2009 4:34am CST
I can't answer this question because I am a girl. I think my friends who are guys will prefer a virgin because that is how it works in India. So, what about you guys? Do you think virginity is important?
2 people like this
14 responses
• Philippines
13 May 09
I am a man. I like marrying a virgin woman. I follow an old styled fashioned or culture. Because if you marry a virgin that means you are the first. I like being the first.
1 person likes this
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
29 Jun 09
I don't see any difference between virgin and non-virgin. The important things for me. She loves me that woman. Love is the important thing in a relationship, not virginity matter. May I ask you, something. If however we presume that you are a guy. Virginity important to you? Yup! There is a good side if we came across for a virgin to be you wife, but did you thinks that more enormous love that will be? If they mind about virginity, let them go. There is nothing to lose...right?
@daliaj (5689)
• India
29 Jun 09
I do believe that love is more important that virginity. But, if I have a chance to choose. I will prefer a virgin for sure due to the above mentioned reasons. Thanks for the response. I am waiting for your reply to the above comment.
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
29 Jun 09
I think belief of the people in your mostly guys, is not a proper arrangement to get married. We don't blame women, if they lost virginity in there first boyfriend. We are not saint to make a mistake, right. Take a look at it. If you are not virgin, then knew that guy about it. He is trying to leave you for no reason, isn't that hurt. Guys that you love so much left you with that reason only. It means they are not love you, they only need is yours. The important for them is your, sweet p and sweet love. Do you have boyfriend right now and are you still not touch?
@daliaj (5689)
• India
30 Jun 09
I got married to my lover five months ago. Yes, I agree that love is the most important thing. I have a question for you, Will you marry a non-virgin women if you are a virgin? If you come to know after a few years that your wife was not virgin before marriage and has a baby in that relationship, don't you feel cheated? or Are you so opended minded to say that you don't mind that and you only value her love to you?
@achinthya (1219)
• India
11 May 09
I am a girl too but I just want to give my opinion how I feel about your question, I think now a days people are very broad they don't consider it anymore as long as she/he is truthful to you, let he/she do anything in pass its her/his life we can't change it back...so we should content with today and enjoy the day and live a life..
@daliaj (5689)
• India
11 May 09
I am taking an excuse to ask this question. What do you think about people saying 'How can you expect a girl to be faithful to her husband if she doesn't care about her virginity before marriage?', She doesn't care more about that even after marriage and there is a high chance for her to cheat her husband'?
@paying (123)
• Singapore
17 Jun 09
A virgin man should choose a virgin woman, to be fair to both. I appreciate a woman who can look after herself and not easy to fool by a man. She will be a faithful wife. Do you feel cheated if your man to be not a virgin?
@daliaj (5689)
• India
18 Jun 09
Yes. Of course. I don't prefer a man who is not.... Incase, I get, I will feel that I am cheated. I have to look at this situation in a different way. I don't deserve somebody who is not a virgin because I am a virgin. So, I deserve a virgin.
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
17 Jun 09
There has been research that shows that when two people are both virgins at marriage, that the marriage has a much better chance at long term mutual satisfaction. Further, a person who sleeps around prior to marriage has 10 times higher chance of having infidelity in marriage. My personal view is this. If a woman does not respect the physical relationship enough to hold it till marriage, how do I know she will hold it after? If it was no big deal before marriage, it won't be a big deal after marriage either. The last think I want on our wedding night, is for my bride to be comparing me to all the other men she's been with. The only thing I would add is, I think it is just as important to a long health marriage, for men to wait till marriage too. The research shows that.
@daliaj (5689)
• India
18 Jun 09
Yes, all the points you mentioned here are importnat. I wish everybody should read your response. I would like to add one more thing to that. I have heard that a women or guy who had been with other guys(lost virginity) has a good chance to doubt his/her partner. Thaks for the valuable response. I don't understand why can't they wait till they find the person whom they are going to marry. I might sound odd in this new gneration. I belive a woman or man who waits until they find their real partner respects their parner.
• Philippines
19 Jun 09
I agree. This deserves the best response.
@sonusd (1548)
• India
15 Jul 09
Hi andy77e as per your view if the girl do not hold her virginity till marriage but think if she fall in love with a guy and they decide to marry each other and then they loose her virginity with a strong believe that she is going to marry him but due to some problem may be that guy left her or may be due o family problem they could not marry that does not mean that girl has done any sin job for which she should be punishable or her character will get a bad stamp that she will be doing the same mistake after marriage.
• Philippines
15 May 09
not that important. but the more important is you and your husband are love each otherS.
@daliaj (5689)
• India
15 May 09
Yes, you are right, love is the most important thing.
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
18 Jun 09
G-d bless those with the best of intentions, but "all you need is love" has been a drastic failure and a lie. The Beatles were wrong. The idea that the most important thing is simply "loving each other" has led to a 50% divorce rate, people who are on the 3rd, 4th, 5th marriage, who have slept around with a dozen partners never finding any real love, and web sites that actively promote cheating wives. Not trying to be pushy, but I am trying to be honest. If you think you are going to get with someone who's nothing like you, has a different world view, has completely different expectations of marriage or relationships, has a completely different back ground, life goals, family goals, religious goals, and a different idea of what life is about... and somehow think that "as long as we love each other... it will all work out", then I respectfully suggest you look around a bit more, and see the wreckage of that thinking in our society.
@daliaj (5689)
• India
19 Jun 09
I think you didn't understand what I and AnimeAdikuz mean above. Love and trust should be main factors in marriage. I know a guy who married a women with a baby. That was his first marriage. He was open minded to accept the girl he loved and the factor that she is not a virgin and has a baby doesn't affect him even though the relatives were against the marriage. Even now after 30 years they are living happily. I will say even if you are marriying a non virgin you should have the mind to accept it and love each other, there is no problem. It happens in many cases. What do you say?
• Philippines
11 May 09
Not that important if you really really love the girl. And it would be awkward on your first wedding night to have a virgin. Although to some they consider virginity a very big deal.
@anangf (1148)
• Indonesia
12 May 09
i agree with you, if we are love in deep with someone we must not argue with this matter. we looking for inside manner not the history in the past. at least..
• Philippines
12 May 09
Wow, that's very nice to know.. :)
• China
22 May 09
u are all nice guys
@sonusd (1548)
• India
15 Jul 09
This topic has so many discussion I just suggest you all guys just get satisfaction from you partner and stay happy. Do not search or virgin because you are not going to check medically before you get married and now the world is full of dishonest person . don't give so much pressure to your brain just enjoy the life.
@sonusd (1548)
• India
15 Jul 09
you are right that you deserve a virgin man in your life but think if he has already loose his virginity then what can you do? so it is better to marry some one and never ever try to know the past of that person because either he have to lie in front of you or else if he is an honest man and tell the truth then you wil be in tension and jealous for rest of your life so do not think about all these just plan to break your virginity at your honeymoon with you hubby
@daliaj (5689)
• India
21 Jul 09
You sound like a mature person advicing his young sister. I agree with you. I have married and I can't do anything with it whatever be the situation of my partner. I don't have magical powers to go to his past and see what is really happened. So, it is better to thank god for what I got and be happy with that. But, I am still in the stand that I deserve a virgin - whatever be the truth or reality. Thanks for the response.
• Philippines
11 May 09
Although it is accepted in many culture and countries around the world, still there are those who believe that marrying someone who is a virgin is a necessity. Personally, I would prefer someone who keep herself pure as she waited for the right person to come along, who has the ability to make a choice of preserving her womanhood for the man she truly loves and be with for the rest of her life. It is indeed a traditional point of view for many but I think its good to keep something "old" although there are some exemptions on cases but what matters above all is the love for both couple.
@daliaj (5689)
• India
12 May 09
I appreciate your response. I also think the same way as you.
• Malaysia
29 Jun 09
Virgin or not virgin is so important? For me, i think the most important is the understanding between both parties, relationship is more important than virgin matter.
@preethaanju (3000)
• India
26 Jun 09
It doesn't matter if she is a virgin or not, so long she is faithful to me after marriage. Show me one human on earth without a blackmark in his/her life.
• Philippines
26 Jun 09
Its a very difficult question to answer because its every guys want to have their wife's virginity but sometimes, love makes it way for a man to accept the state of a girl. We can't blame them in the past. If we love them, we have to accept and be open minded. It does'nt mean that its ok for a Guy to have their wife lost their virginity. As much as possbible, they should keep it.... Learn to think twice before giving in to it.
• Philippines
18 Jun 09
virginity is not the case for this matter especially with technologies coming out and we are in the new generation. It's ok if man/woman you want the rest of your life is not a virgin anymore as long as that special bond, love, and feeling of truthfulness and happiness, it doesn't matter anymore. If you're an old styled fashion man/woman, well better think again.
@hanah87 (1846)
• Malaysia
18 Jun 09
If i be the man,i will choose a virgin girl.It important to choose the virgin girl because it show us the girl is the holy and have good attitude.It will give good impact to the relationship too and for our future child.This is just my opinion.Thank you.
• India
12 May 09
It all depends on the person's perception of marriage, the way he has grown up and the people he grown up with, and most importantly the culture he follows. I prefer a virgin cause I believe that for leading a happy married life the past should also clean!