This Really Hits Below The Belt: Do We Have A Vengeance Member Here?

@pyewacket (43903)
United States
May 13, 2009 4:43am CST
Okay first up. A lot of activity goes behind the scenes here at MyLot land. What I mean is many of us have exchanged our private emails to relate to things about MyLot that we don't care to openly discuss as a discussion here or to write in PMs...you know...uh, gossip?? Some things are deeply personal, some hilarious, and some voicing suspicions...OH NOW COME ON...YOU DO IT TO....DON'T LIE. LOL Anyway, it's come to my attention of a real disturbing fact. There's been a member who hasn't been here long, yet the person is a friend collector for no more than gaining "friends" for referrals. The person asked me as a friend and since the person did indeed reply to one of my discussions I figured, okay what the heck. I'm very picky who I add as friends mind you. Not five minutes pass and I get a PM from said person asking me to do a referral exchange..like WTF? Pissed off I PM'd the person to openly say how dare you plague me with this concept...I even pointed out that I did a whole discussion about this very factor about friends who only want friends for exploiting referrals...I deleted said person. More minutes passed and get ANOTHER friend request...HOWEVER. This is the creepy part. Even though I deleted the person, he still managed to PM me begging me not to delete him...Like huh? How did the person PM me many hours later AFTER I deleted him as a friend? ONE CANNOT PM ANOTHER PERSON IF NOT A FRIEND. The disturbing part is here...I've gotten private emails from a few people who have had the same "scam" by said person. Same thing. The person is very persistent begging not to delete them as a friend...here is where the real shiit issue comes about. My friends who have this same "connection" with said person are getting discussions deleted left and right...making me suspect that "said" person may have multiple accounts somehow as well and the reason my friends discussions are being deleted due to a vengeance thing...the discussions involved are very innocent discussions done by my friends and one person warned me that since I deleted said person to expect a lot of my discussions to be deleted. Now all this is very speculative to bring in a legal sense and term of it. There's no proof...uh, yet. I plan to do some more "research" about this. If any of my friends want to privately email me about this do so...many of my dear friends on said person's list are my friends as well and wonder if their discussions have been deleted more than usual after accepting said person. Uh. To clear things up a bit, said person is male..I won't divulge country of origin....(cough, cough) But to my friends have you notice your discussions being deleted despite NO violations of guidelines...did you accept someone recently that plagued you with referrals and maybe deleted them? DO NOT NAME NAMES. I'm only posting this since this may be a suspected troublemaker and can report this privately to MyLot
22 people like this
48 responses
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
13 May 09
Hi Pye! I don't have your private email but you know where to find me. I also think that I have a darn good idea as to the user that you are talking about as I have my own suspicions of dubious activites by this 'element'. Your 'cough' says it all and confirms that we are barking up the same tree There are some odd 'goings-on' and it all started at the same time that this particular user arrived (or should I say 'returned'). Buzz me please and we can compare notes
5 people like this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
13 May 09
Well, we get ppl like that sometimes and they usually get caught and eventually kicked off here. I had someone request a friendship a few weeks ago...a man, no discussions started, no discussions responded to and some 30 odd pages of MyLot friends. Now why in the world would anyone add someone that never started or responded to a discussion. What's the point? I may not stay right on top of all the discussions I have but you can look at my profile and see that I've started more than my share and I do participate when I can in responding. Anyways, I declined his invitation and immediately another one was sent to me from the same person. I got no less than about 10 invites over the next couple days. I finally left the last one just so he couldn't send another one. As to those that spam...which is what I call what the person did that your talking about...I don't blame you for deleting them and I would have sent a message to MyLot questioning how he was able to message you after you deleted him...maybe they would have looked into it more. I do think MyLot needs to beef up things on MyLot when it comes to trolls and spammers. Recently I encountered a member, he's kind of new, who purposely goes around attacking ppl that don't agree with him. He will respond to a discussion, then go through other ppl's responses and attack those he doesn't like. He has a few friends that kind of tag along with him too. I can't really see the point in commenting to someone's response if all your going to do is fight with them...why bother? Anyways, I hope you get this sorted out and you don't end up losing too many discussions. [b]~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~ **STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**[/b]
4 people like this
• United States
13 May 09
Heyyyyyyyyyyy twoey........sounds like the same 'friend' that wanted to add me as well but I never got a reinvite after deleting him.
2 people like this
@Ldyjarhead (10233)
• United States
13 May 09
I wonder if the person had an old PM still in their box here if they could reply to that and it still get to you, even if you had deleted them. Don't know if it can be done, but it sounds like a reasonable possibility. I interact with my friends mostly via emails, IM or on FaceBook so the only PMs I get here are usually what you speak of, the 'join me in this adventure' type thing. No thanks ...
3 people like this
• United States
13 May 09
Yes, they can. Even after removal, they can reply to a message, & it'll still get sent to the other person.
3 people like this
• United States
13 May 09
So, by simply responding back to a harassing email, one can set themselves up for even more harassment later on? No thanks! Did not know that. If I get an email from Mr. Man, I'll just delete it without comment. Thanks for that update.
3 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
13 May 09
Let me add my appreciation for sharing this with us! I wasn't sure if it was possible but I wouldn't see how it couldn't be! Glad to know! Have fun mylotting and keep your eyes peeled!
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
14 May 09
hi pye. i have been having problems w/somone wish i knew wo he is. i started a really nice discussion monday morn about what my gradson & i had done mother's say. it was a very nice innocent discussion & it was deleted. my moneuy desreased etc. i had typed in caps because my eyes are bad but had doing this for a year. all of a sudden mylot sent me a message saying if i typed in cap again that i would be terminated for good. that this was my first & final notice. got a message this morn from a friend someoine had gotten on to herabout typoes. wonder who made them the judge of all of us. another friend has has discussions deleted. i hope u can find out what the he!! is going on. good luck!
2 people like this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
15 May 09
hi jazz, thanks for your message. i am angry to. what's up w/these people that they don't have anything to do but nitpick everybody on here. i wouldn't think that was a fun thing to do. i think it's ridiculous that they get away w/it. there like some little hateful little brat that likes to be a tattletail. i never did like tattletails.
2 people like this
@jazzsue58 (2666)
14 May 09
Do you feel just a little bit victimised, AL? I know I would! If MyLot carry on like this, they'll find a lot of loyal and disgruntled people leaving, and they'll be left with all the 'Hey I made $50 in five minutes PM me!!!' spammers emailing each other and the tasks will all get done wrong or not done at all and ... and ... Think I'd best stop there!
3 people like this
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
13 May 09
This is very disturbing indeed. I have not been approached by this person and I pray that he is not already on my friends list; I guess I would know if he was! It is such a shame. I have a couple of 'friends' in my list that I regret and I fear deleting them because of the harassment you mention. Interesting that if you delete someone the can still PM you! I guess your mail is still on their message list so they can just reply. This is so sad; it makes me feel sick...
3 people like this
@TLChimes (4822)
• United States
13 May 09
Thanks for the heads up! I know of who you speak but didn't have the extra issues. I hate double dealing and two faced people and not playing fair here is getting out of hand. There are good people here and this garbage shouldn't be going on.
4 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
13 May 09
I have not any requests at all I did a few Days ago but deleted as I will only have my closest Friends on my list here now as you know I hope this Person gets caught out and it is very strange that he was able to pm you after you deleted him as I did not think that was possible at all Why is it that these People get away with it on here Hugs
2 people like this
• United States
13 May 09
Hiya Gabs! How you been? How's Gissi? Been doing pretty good here but wish I could squeeze more online time into my busy schedule. Even though I'm not here, I still think of my friends here.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (157027)
• United States
13 May 09
My friends are being hit. I do not delete, I just ignore. I have a lot of people who spam me. I figure they will get tired eventually. I lost seven cents last night, which tells me that three to five discussions I responded to in the last few days have been removed. It is frustrating, because for the most part this is a nice place to be. I am on my way out the door for work, will join in later.
@GardenGerty (157027)
• United States
14 May 09
Your discussions were some, and I knew there was a risk associated there. I am floored by at least one that was deleted that belonged to another friend. It was a wonderful, innocent, delightful discussion and I cannot think why it is gone, but it is. I tend to respond in discussions twice if I can relate, so three discussions could easily lose me seven cents.
1 person likes this
@nanajanet (4436)
• United States
15 May 09
I do not pay attention to my posts, so I do not know if any were deleted, but I have deleted friends who used me only as referrals. I do only a couple of paying sites and do not even bother with referrals anymore. Once they die, I will close them as I am just too busy and my job is paying well. Thank God. It just bugs me. It is like people who try to push their religion on me. I am smart enough to know what I need.
2 people like this
@Barb42 (4214)
• United States
14 May 09
I haven't had any discussions deleted since I haven't started any lately. But I do comment lots. And this week, I found my money had gone down over $6 almost over night! I was almost payout and now it's very low! I know someone had to lose discussions for mine to go so low this week. That disturbs me. I have written management, but heard nothing from them. I hope the person is found and stopped.
2 people like this
@ekimflow (121)
• United States
14 May 09
yes i know of a sort of thing like this.i responded to a discussion of theirs and they like it so they asked me to friend them,well i did and the next thing all they did was start useless discussions trying to get their money built up.they never have responded to any that i started as few as they might be but for every 1 i started they had 25.i started to delete them as soon as i saw them in my in-box because why read useless bull from them when i have many more that are important to read.i should delete them as a friend because a friend would chat with you not wanting something from you.i'm not looking for friend like that,heck i have over 3000+ friends on another site i'm on and i'm on over 50+ sites.if somebody want to be friends just for that reason fine,if they only want to be friends because they want something from you well sorry i don't need friends like that!like they say "with friends like that you don't need enemies".i have a friend on another site that liked a responds i gave on a comment that they asked me to friend them,and after a few postings they want me to be a moderator of the group.
2 people like this
@sulynsi (2669)
• Canada
14 May 09
Excellent post! Thank you Pye. I learn so much more from threads like this one than any amount of reading FAQ's. Life in the "trenches" so to speak. I wonder if it wouldn't be a good idea to put a restriction on PM requests. I mean, I can't even get smilies (sniff) until I post to 200. I can't cut and paste a reference, or my own work from my word processor (that drives me nuts!) until I reach 500! Why should someone brand new, unknown and untested be able to request friendship links, particularly when they are so open to abuse? I think its marvellous, and very flattering to RECEIVE a friendship request from long time users, when you're a newbie. THEY have the experience to decide who could and should be allowed into the fold. The old adage, "when in Rome, do as the Romans do", applies. When you join a community that is already established it is only proper to go by their rules of conduct. As for AntiqueLady's dilemma. I wonder if EVERY single long time user started to write in caps, would they delete you all? I really doubt that would do myLot any good. They really need to consider the circumstances. Maybe there could be a special icon for a person with special needs. It could be set up on profile. Like a special parking permit. It would appear on every post they make to help people realize that they are not yelling they simply have difficulty with the font. Maybe a special font could be devised. For all those who have invited or accepted me as a friend, thank you, and please, if I ever give you cause to regret it, let me know!
2 people like this
• United States
13 May 09
Pye- I wanted to respond to you this morning but Mylot was down for services. Just recently this occured to me. It happened twice in a row. The first person I sent a message back stating it was a violation of TOS and to stop sending out referral links. I deleted them, got a second add, and ended up deleting that one. However, in the process overnight I lost 20 posts. Another member thought it was the spring cleaning of Mylot, so I thought that made sense and didn't give it another thought until your post this morning. In speaking with another about it they warned not to reply to anymore emails from those I do not know on Mylot well enough, and to none that have a referral link in them. They said it's very possible that it worked like it does with email scams, that once you've replied they then gain access to accounts and can reak all sorts of havaoc. I can't seem to report the emails sent to me directly via the email, but I sent complaints already to Mylot, but I never have heard back from them. (They've never once answered any of my questions directly about other matters). At this point, I think the best we can do as a community of friends is stay in contact with one another and warn each other, as you have, about potential threats to our mylot accounts. Thanks for the post, and let me know via PM if things have worked out for your friend please. Namaste-Anora
2 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
14 May 09
'At this point, I think the best we can do as a community of friends is stay in contact with one another and warn each other, as you have, about potential threats to our mylot accounts.' I have to agree with you Anora! Having friends here is not only in order to gain responses on our discussions but to be able to be in contact about the good and the bad things which may or not be happening and by keeping in touch through PM we keep things out of discussions and avoid even more damage being done too. PMs are also a kind of 'life-line' as many of my friends are now aware.
2 people like this
@scififan43 (2434)
• United States
14 May 09
Hi I have just read your post. I have had the same thing happen to me with a user here frineding me and then ask for referal. I went and do so. I sgined up for the site he wanted but I have not been active on it. I belive I know who you are talking about but I have not experence any problems with this persons so far. as far as I know my disscussions have not been delted, but I may check on that. I have not heard from this person in a while so I am not experenceing any peroblems.
2 people like this
@LittleMel (8742)
• Canada
14 May 09
I denied most friends requests in the past 6 months. I never got plagued by referrals by the ones I accepted. If they spam me I will delete them I don't care the consequences. I don't have many friends in real life so why should online be different. If they ever do to me what they do to you, I will find a way to make them pay for it. I don't create a lot of discussions but if they ever cause it to be deleted or respond rudely etc, I will make sure those will be deleted even if it will cost me my own discussion. Someone wants money so bad, well mylot isn't the place for that. I wonder if mylot is behind this, how is it that mylot doesn't read discussion before deleting it? I always thought that's why a lot of discussions are deleted without breaking rules. But now I start to think mylot knows who is behind this and supporting it. If it's not true, then why does it keep happening? if it's true, then I think it's time for mylotters to do something about it. There is a will, there is a way, that's all I can say.
@zandi458 (28102)
• Malaysia
14 May 09
I believe there are spiteful people here who have nothing better to do but create havoc in mylot. They are either working in groups or having multiple accounts to enable them to execute their evil work of rating others negatively and getting discussions deleted. They target well their victims and often people who are vocal in their stance. Is this jealousy or childish act? I have the strong feelings that these so called 'friends' are sitting comfortably in my friends list without me realizing that they are actually wolf in the lamb's clothing. Many times I feel hopeless of staying any longer here as it seems my every action is being watched. Little mistakes I made is met with a hue of criticism and my little earnings taken away while my rating remain stagnant despite actively posting and responding. But I would not surrender to this sort of threat as an 'old horse' here I have my very own agenda why I am where I am now. I enjoy being in the company of all my friends here. Let us join hands to fight this menace that is trying to ruin the harmony in mylot.
2 people like this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
14 May 09
That is a bad situation. I suppose after my long absence from mylot, issues like this are still around. I think we can choose to ignore these types or just report abuse to mylot if he or she has done it more than 1 time. That's one part. The other part which I do worry about are people that get framed in the process. Perhaps if A does it but everyone points finger at B. And at the same time, B's activities are somewhat close to A, but A got away with the blame. Something like that. I think it's dangerous, this type of games and you are so right in not naming that person. Way to go, pye, I have always respected you so much. Especially after this discussion. I do agree that some are persistent with their PMs. That irks me too at times. Have a nice day.
@p1kef1sh (45681)
14 May 09
Sometimes it does take a while for the person deleted to have you cleared from their friends list. But it is decidedly off to continue with such behaviour when it has been made very clear that it is not wanted. I got a PM yesterday warning me of the activity of another - someone on my pending friends list. They were declined. I don't need the hassle. I have had no discussions deleted and neither have my ratings increased or gone down. I just wish that some folk would get a life!
2 people like this
@K46620 (1986)
• United States
14 May 09
Yes, yesterday I got a friend request from someone that promptly sent a referral exchange message. I said I might do it but sent my referral links first. I will not sign up for his thing unless I can confirm he signed up under one of mine. I probably would have rejected this request if I knew beforehand. I'm sure its the same person you are dealing with. Hint, does his name have 7 letters? Do you suggest I delete him as friend or just ignore him? I have not noticed any of my discussions getting deleted yet.
2 people like this
@jayrene (2708)
• Philippines
14 May 09
OMG!!!! i think i have that one... yes i received an email for an exchange in reflinks, darn... ooohhh... sheeeettt... as i have had referral exchanges before i came here, so it never entered my mind that this one could harm me or something... i will check all my PMs again now after this, to see what that site was... there's something i need to know and see about that site... and next time i will be careful and more watchful as to who i add in my friends list. thanks for sharing this.
2 people like this