are you a person who can't take losing an argument?

@cainam (493)
Philippines
May 19, 2009 9:45pm CST
before, i was a person who does'nt want to lose any argument even if it is doesn't make any sense to argue. i think it is just winning that matters to me and it is not healthy.people avoids making conversations with me because of this bad habit. until i met my boyfriend. unbelievably he is worst than me and he argues even it's too obvious that he no longer has a point. with him, i learned to stay silent even i want to argue. now, it doesn't matter if i win an argument but keeping the relationship is all that matter.
2 people like this
21 responses
@harryt123 (327)
• United States
20 May 09
I myself am the type of person that if found in a discussion or an argument have to not always be the winner but I do defend my valid argument and explain to the other person the point that I am trying to prove. I do know that the behavior such as having an argument and always wanting to be the winner can sever relationships and the person would be losing friends quickly and it is actually not a healthy behavior. It is always a good suggestion to be the bigger person and take the loss with a smile and the fault nicely.
1 person likes this
@modstar (9612)
• Philippines
21 May 09
Well i do like winning or arguments but there are time when i'm clearly on the losing end of the argument for a simple fact that i am really wrong no matter what. i just don't let it go just like that, i would reason out as much as i can without really being offensive of course though sometimes i was being sarcastic. Especially when i'm arguing with a girlfriend which i know that i i'm on the right side, i would really argue until the end that she would agree to the things i'm telling her. It's for her own good anyway.
@Ruby722 (798)
• China
21 May 09
Your experience reminds of my an old friend,But we are not friend any more.She is my high school classmate and roomrate.we were very very good friedn.We did anything together.But in some reason as you said,she is a person who ever want to lose any argument even else knows it's doesn't make any sense to argue.At that time i was too young i don't know how to bear and keep silent ,so we got a big quarrel.And after that we didn't say any words.And now i feel i little regret
@SmithLow (10)
• United States
21 May 09
We win some, we lose some thats just the way the cookie crumbles. I try to avoid arguments by all means. As you get older you learn how to let something go.
@larish (2195)
• Philippines
20 May 09
If its worth fighting for. I will make sure that I will argue until my last breathe. lol. But honestly it really depends whom I talking/arguing to if he is someone really stupid, I won't take much time explaining/arguing. If he is someone I love, I will raise my point and afterwards keep quite. I believe that it is not winning thats important from my love ones but the extended understanding I need for any issues that we both have.
@lingli_78 (12846)
• Australia
20 May 09
no, i don't actually... i prefer to avoid confrontations and just keep quiet if i can... i don't see the point in arguing and it only makes me tired... and i believe that silent is golden... so if i can avoid an argument, i will definitely do it as i don't want to waste my energy... take care and have a nice day...
• Philippines
20 May 09
haha.. Maybe that's why God gave him to you. I was also like that somtimes. Depends on the person. With my friends or other people if I know I have a point or Im right I say what I know is right. But I didnt mean to argue with them. In the house I argue with all of them. haha! . They always thought whatever mistakes has done in the house it was me who did it. It's just sucks! With that I tend to argue everyone in the family except my granda. They all thought now that I'm bad so almost everything they blame it to me. When they critisize me I always argue or say words in not a nice way. I cant blame myself because I believe its their fault why I become like this.
• United States
20 May 09
You can never win an argument. If you win an argument then someone you care about usually must lose. so I found out a way to make it where both parties win. never argue to begin with. if you disagree with someone then don't come out and say your wrong. instead ask here to explain it and then say "that sounds good, have you hear about this" or " this could be the way it works also" So you can give your opinion and not hurt the other persons pride. never come out and say, your wrong i'm right. So if you stick to this rule you win every argument because no ones feeling get hurt. If you right and you know it and the other person is not going to budge fron there stance then you can just let it go and you win for being the better person and no one gets hurt. take care, Francisco
@Bluepatch (2481)
• Trinidad And Tobago
20 May 09
It depends on the arguement and the person. If its not important to me, either of these, then it really doesn't matter. But, if the person's actions that are going to result from the arguement are important to me then I can't take losing it without an effort.
@zed_k4 (17630)
• Singapore
20 May 09
I must admit that I used to be like that too. But I corrected myself because I saw the people that I ended up in arguments not liking one bit what I've done or said. And you know the saying majority wins. I was thinking like why would everybody have the same opinions and therefore I decided to change for the better. I am not perfect yet, but I am faring a bit more better now and don't end up like a sour grape.
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
20 May 09
I used to be an argumentative person and never surrender to defeat. I always want to prove that I am in the right. But slowly I realized that it doesn't prove anything to go against the grain. I mellow down a lot now and my silence has given me a lot of peace of mind.
• India
20 May 09
hmm it depends about my mood... wen m cool i myself stop argue..coz i dnt want to spoil mood..but wen m confindent on my fact i alwayz argue with opponent.. its not dat i didnt admit wen m wrong..but most of the times it happens to me d opponent is arguing on invalid thing.. sometime when m in anger i cant control myself and start arguing even if he/she is correct rather tha me...
@kritipen (4085)
• United States
20 May 09
I also had this not so very good habit. But as time went by people around me and i myself got so tired that i had to let go off the habit. My family and my friends started to stop arguing with me and i finally felt bad. I think this habit of trying to win the argument and being the last one to speak is more common than we think and most of us will grow out of the habit one day or the other and those of us who dont are probably the ones who didnt get the right oppurtunity for change.
• China
20 May 09
I think technical argument is good for us to improve the technology. But if you argue for everything in your daily life, I don't think it is a good habit.
• India
20 May 09
I was at some time the same like you. Used to argue for each and everything which I didn't like and the reasoning for my arguments used to be horrible. It was just arguing for the sake of it .... just defending my position because I have taken a stand. And you know that irresistible feeling of having the last word in an argument was something that drove me from crazy to being insane. Quite simply life suffered. Myself and people around me were having a time full of tension and we were not happy at all. How would be people around me be happy when I was myself upset. So with some help and a lot of effort I decided to change things for the better. I started to develop the habit of listening and analyzing what the other person wants to say before jumping to my own conclusion and giving my own view. It helped and it takes real patience and virtue to listen and understand others. Bu nature all of us want ourselves to be heard so doing the opposite is indeed tough. But once you master it life becomes much happier and easier.
@hotsummer (10376)
• Philippines
20 May 09
i do usually let it go. i don't push my belief on others. if they do want to look right i just let it. i will not any more argue. it will not matter if they thing they have won the argument. as long as i think that i know that i am right. if they are not convinced. it will not affect me. though i may feel some what irritated by their behavior.
@faisai (1140)
• Hong Kong
20 May 09
I am the kind of guy who can't stand losing an argument. I don't know how bad it is until recently when I am more involved in meeting with my teammates at work. During meeting, there are always different points of view and understandably, I keep arguing with others as I think they don't have much points in their own arguments. The problem is that I insist so much that usually these arguments turn into cold fight and just stall the progress. So, as time progress, I learn to shut my mouth up. Even if I think what they think is rather irrational, I just don't argue anymore. I can't help keep thinking: What's the point!?
• India
20 May 09
Ya. I am a person who didnot want to lose an argument.
@eiram25 (1077)
• Philippines
20 May 09
i guess i'm the kind of person who debates on just about anything.but when i try to listen to the others and think that their argument is more reasonable than mine,i accept that opinion and concede.i kinda agree with you there about that argument with your boyfriend.i think what's more important is the relationship.anywayz,argument is always inevitable since we are unique. happy mylotting!
• Canada
20 May 09
I'm the sort of person who always has to win an argument. I feel that the points I make are better than everyone else's and just make more sense, lol. I refuse to be wrong.