I need help gaining weight!

@rebelmel (1387)
United States
May 24, 2009 3:31pm CST
I have always been a very tiny lady. I am 5 foot 1 inch and I weight 90 pounds. I'm a twig! Recently, I have been very uncomfortable about my weight. People ask if I am sick, or if I have drug problems. People assume I have an eating disorder. I am not DISGUSTINGLY skinny, I shouldn't be asked these questions. Ever. But I am. And I want it to stop. I want to gain some weight, do you have any advice? Have you ever felt this way? I know it's pretty common, I have a few friends that tried putting on weight and failed.
10 people like this
51 responses
@zandi458 (27954)
• Malaysia
25 May 09
I am just the opposite of you. I have been trying to shed some weight but it seems that I am destined to be on the bigger size but not obese. I love to be able to fit in to most designers clothing but can't as they seems to go for those slimmer bodies. I wish I can be like you, eating a lot without gaining weight. It is a dream come true if I can only reduce some weight. My only advice to you is to eat more and surely you'll gain your much desired weight.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
I think that losing weight might not be as difficult as it seems. I have a few friends who have tried the fruit diet. For a week, try only eating fruits and drinking water, or natural fruit juice. That will pump your body with energy and vitamins, but none of the calories. If that helps you lose a couple pounds, try eating more fruits than breads and meats. Also, instead of whole milk, always use skim milk. Drink water with each meal instead of sodas or milk. And always drink coffee - it's an appetite suppressant.
1 person likes this
@zandi458 (27954)
• Malaysia
26 May 09
Thanks for the tips. I think it needs a strong will to change to this diet but it is worth giving it a try.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 Jul 09
Have any of my tips helped you lose weight? I was just skimming through my old conversations and I noticed that a few months ago I gave you a few tips to help you lose a few pounds, and I was wondering/hoping that they might have helped you! So, what's the verdict?
@candymarie (1368)
• Canada
25 May 09
I had the same problem, thankfully though, I managed to weigh 120-125 now, my weight still jumps, but now I'm at the proper weight, so it doesn't concern me much anymore. But I felt SO uncomfortable in my body, and whenever my weight would jump up 5 pounds when I was underweight, so many people would compliment me, "Oh you look so great! So healthy..."But I would feel like CRAP! Whenever my weight jumped like that, I wouldn't feel great at all! Mainly because my clothes would all be too tight, and then I would stress about the cost of buying new clothes, and well, the stress put that weight off again. SO, what I ended up doing, is that whenever I went to buy new clothes, I would get 1-2 sizes bigger, because one, they might just shrink in the washer/dryer ANYWAYS, and whenever I had a weight issue again, I wouldn't feel so much like crap! lol. I know that was a bad way to look at it, but it was true, example? When my jeans were too tight around the waste? Yeah, my stomach would hurt and I would feel ill, thankfully not enough to throw up (now THAT would start the rumors lol) and I would still worry about something ripping. Yeah it was just 5 pounds, but it ballooned me like you wouldn't believe it! But what ended up happening is that I became more active, which I had to do at work, what with working in shipping and receiving, and I just NEEDED to eat more to keep my energy up. Maybe start a new exercise program, a cardio program, and then you'll just notice that you need to eat more....or start smoking MJ lol. Always good for the munchies. Your choice of course! Good luck.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
Just a few days ago I felt like I put on a pound or two and my boss wouldn't stop talking about how much better I looked. When you're a really small girl, even a pound shows. Luckily, I don't wear jeans (I haven't found any that fit me in the past year, except for abercrombie kids, lol) So I have been wearing spandex and dresses, so putting on a couple pounds wont force me to buy too many new clothes. I smoke MJ more than anyone else I know, which is hilarious, because I can't gain weight, even when I get the munchies and eat an entire quart of ice cream, or bake a few batches of cookies and eat them all before I sober up. Luckily, for me, in my state the possession of under and ounce has been decriminalized, meaning that the authorities probably wont try to get you in trouble if you are caught with less than an ounce. Unless they are really out to get you. But if you have less than an ounce, you could face a 100 dollar fine.
@Annmac (950)
25 May 09
Ok I admit it, I smoke it too and even getting the munchies doesn't put the weight on me either. lol I think it's a metabolism problem. We skinnies just have a faster than normal one. They did drop the classification in the UK but have put it back up so I'm not sure where the law stands now.
• Canada
25 May 09
Yeah, here in Canada, it LOOKS like they may legalize it, but mainly for people whom have a prescription, yah know, cancer patients, and along some lines, people with arthritis. I have arthritis myself, but am kind of scared to ask my family doctor in case someone was pulling my leg about the prescription thing lol.
@Loen210 (1533)
• United States
25 May 09
Since it sounds like you have tried somewhat yourself (you said you do eat a lot, or at least "love to eat"), it is important to bring this up with your doctor. I'd recommend also getting a recommendation for a dietician/nutritionalist, who can guide you. I was quite sick once, which caused me to lose too much weight (unmemorable time of surgery that went bad). I saw nutritionalists and GI docs. I doubt you'd need to be fed through a tube in your body. ;o( But one of my first starts was adding in ENSURE (which was also recommended and started at the hospital). I had 3-4 cans a day along with my meals. This helped, but don't expect it to do miracles. It is a healthy drink. Most important again is to talk to your medical doctor/specialist for the safest and best way. Let us know how it goes.
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
I have actually heard that ensure works. I have to stop by the supermarket on my lunch break - maybe I'll pick some up! I am sorry to hear that a surgery went bad, but at least you are doing much better now!
@Loen210 (1533)
• United States
26 May 09
Glad to help. And my favorite flavor is definitely the chocolate one. But FYI, they have: - (new) Rich Dark Chocolate - Homemade Vanilla - Creamy Milk Chocolate - Strawberries & Cream - Butter Pecan - Coffee Latte I noticed you said you are trying to cut back on coffee, so maybe you'd like the coffee flavor for a sub. I think the milk chocolate is delicious! :o) I did have to drink multiple ones though (as snacks remember, not a replacement for food).
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 Jul 09
MMM! The coffee latte one sounds really good! I definitely should look into buying a case of these or something. All of the flavors actually sound good to me. How many calories are in a can of ensure? If I use them as drinks throughout the day, maybe that will help me put on a few pounds.
• United States
26 Jul 09
WOW. We have the same problem. I am 5"4 and 100 pounds. Like you said, people always assume I have an eating disorder or just exclaim, "Girl, you need to eat!" The only problem is that I eat all the time! I'll eat about ten small meals in a day, and I continuously snack on sunflower seeds and other non-messy but healthy snacks when I read, am on the computer (I'm actually eating some now), or when I do other things. I literally am always eating, which makes working uncomfortable because I can only eat three times within eight hours. The sad thing is that I can only maintain my weight like this. When I had my wisdom teeth taken out a few years ago, I had issues and my teeth were in extreme pain for two weeks and not two days, like normal. Because of this, I wasn't eating all the time like I usually do, and I became very sick. I was down to about 87 pounds and ended up going to the hospital for dehydration. As soon as the tooth pain was gone, I gained all my weight back within a week, reached 100 pounds, then stopped again. It's as if my body is saying, "No, this is where I'd like to stay, thank you!" :) To be honest, since you aren't sick or disgustingly skinny, I wouldn't worry as much about putting on weight...just stay healthy. I agree with you that it is very uncomfortable when people judge you for something you really can't help. In fact, I posted a picture of my husband and I on our wedding day in a discussion and had some person say I was too skinny. It hurts because I can't help it...and although I'm very petite, I'm the healthiest person I know. If you really feel you need to gain weight, don't rely on fattening foods to get you there. That would be very counter-productive. You might try exercising to gain muscle weight...although I've tried that as well and it doesn't help me personally. 90 pounds may be the weight that your body is comfortable at. Good luck in either direction you choose. :)
1 person likes this
• United States
25 May 09
Hey, you know, I noticed a lot of people telling you to drink protein shakes and eat more and etc to put on weight. To me, it seems as though you're perfectly fine as you are, but maybe you should let the people who accuse you of being too thin to mind their own business. 5'1" and 90 lbs is a healthy height/weight ratio, and even if it weren't, everyone's different. It's what's healthy for you. So keep eating healthfully and maintaining a cheerful outlook and active life. And the next person who gasps and says you MUST be anorexic, ask to see their graduate degree in health. No degree? Then "You are extrememly rude to judge me by my looks when I eat more healthfully than you do" usually works pretty well. :)
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
Yeah, as of lately I have become quite snippy when it comes to people commenting on my weight. It is no ones place to tell me I am too skinny. I went to visit my parents and my father wouldn't stop telling me that I was too skinny. It was really irritating. I kept telling him that I know I am thin and there is nothing I can do about it, I wish I could change it if I could. And he kept responding with "No, but your REALLY skinny" It's like, "I KNOW I JUST AGREED WITH YOU!"
@albert2412 (1782)
• United States
25 May 09
Hi Have you maybe asked your doctor if you have a metabulism problem? some people burn a lot more calories than other people do. As for me, most of my life i have been fat. Many people in life have mistreated me and when I am mistreated, I tend to want to eat to forget my problems. Unfortunately, many of the things that I eat are fattening. Perhaps you might want to change what you eat, to eat more foods with a lot of calories, and to eat more often. You are a pretty young lady and I wish you the best. Albert
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
Well thank you! I have always been thin my whole life, and I have always wanted to gain a little bit of weight. It has been difficult, especially as an adult because I have so much work to do and so many errands to run, sometimes the time flies right by and I don't even notice when I miss lunch.
• United States
25 May 09
I have worked with many people who wanted to gain weight, both with hypnosis and personal training. I would first suggest working out...resistance training mostly and minimal cardio training (maybe 15 min/3xper week) to avoid burning too many calories. Work the large muscles of the body - legs, chest, back, abs, with moderate weight and working up to heavier weight. Work each muscle group 3 x per week. Now, the difficult part...in order to build more muscle (don't worry, it isn't likely that you have the hormones to build muscle like a man), you have to take in more calories than you use. This can be tricky. You might want to try eating high calorie foods, including "good" fats (nuts, avocado, olive oil, etc...). Try 4 meals per day and add 2-3 "weight gain" shakes (can be found at any health food store). I would also suggest that you get a trainer, at least for a few sessions...to ensure that you are doing the exercises properly and at the right amount of resistance to reach your goals. Although I mostly work with people wanting to lose weight with hypnosis, I have also worked successfully with weight gain as well. Find a hypnotherapist in your area (try to get a referral from someone you know...). Hypnosis can help you refocus your attention toward what you DO want, rather than what you do not want...and make it much easier. If you want to learn more about hypnosis and how it works, read my blog jbergkvist. blogspot . com. I also make custom/personalized hypnosis cd's that are very effective, in the event that you cannot find someone where you live. Just contact me if you have any questions about any of the above :) The MOST important thing you can do is be consistent. Eating a little bit more and adding a little exercise on a regular basis will bring you better results than doing alot some of the time. Hang in there and don't give up!!! You CAN do it!
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
Thanks for the advice. This all sounds pretty good. I will definitely try working out a bit more and see where that takes me. If all else fails, I'll come to you for help on the hypnosis!
• Philippines
25 May 09
You're not alone.. I was way skinnier than you back then.. I only weigh 86 lbs with 5"1 3/4' height. But now, I weight close to 100 lbs, still underweight, skinny. I've always wanted to put weight, but people think that I just have the right built for my height.. I haven't tried everything, but working out helped me out.. And eating the right food at small amount and like more than 3x in a day.. Big amount of food for every meal is not advisable especially if you have fast metabolism.. I've tried drinking the protein supplement, you know like for the gym buff, I was not consistent, but I think it kind of worked. I think it's more having positive outlook and being determined of putting some weight... I hope these all helps..
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
Those are some good tips. I was thinking I should start keeping a "food diary" and keep track of how much I weigh each week. I will have to buy a scale before I can do that, though, but I think with some of the tips I have gathered in this conversation that maybe I might be able to gain a few pounds!
25 May 09
This is not exactly a helthy thing to do and I would certainly have a word with your doctor about it, but taking glucose when you are not active could put weight on you. The glucose gets into your system quickly and any not used immediatley will go straight into storage
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
That is interesting! Maybe I should talk to my doctor about that. I haven't thought of that, before. Thanks!
@LouieWpHs04 (4560)
• United States
25 May 09
I can put on weight, and lose weight just like that. I would suggest.. uhh. Eating at fast food places for like a month? ahha. If it makes you feel any better I think you look fine just the way you are, ;) In fact, if that's you in your default picture you're quite hot.
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
Oh, why thank you. There was one time in my life where I actually gained a bit of weight, but at that point I wasn't eating meat or dairy products (weird how things work out, huh?) and as soon as I started eating the dairy again, I shed a few pounds. I don't want to gain weight so badly that I will be willing to give up steaks and omlettes and cheeses, so I may be destined to be this size forever!
@derek_a (10903)
25 May 09
As a therapist I have been asked clients to gain weight so many times. For most thinner people this is difficult because they have that sort of metabolism. It is not usually the answer people want to hear, but learning to accept oneself exactly as one is, is the best possible way forward with this. Then, if weight it meant to be gained, it will be. If not, then because of self-acceptance, then it ceases to matter. I would say, look at the way you feel, not the way you think you ought[b][/b] to be. Fritz Perls, the Gestalt Therapist wrote, "I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. If we meet, it could be wonderful. If not, then it cannot be helped". If people ask questions let them. You know how you feel. - Derek
1 person likes this
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
I actually have accepted that I will be tiny for the rest of my life, and that doesn't bother me. I know that one day when I am thirty people will think I am much younger, and seriously? Name a 30 year old who doesn't want to look young! I just wanted to gain a few pounds, and I know there are a lot of women out there who face the same problem as me. Maybe someone out there has a few tips. If not, I won't be discouraged. It can't hurt to try!
• India
25 May 09
putting on extra weight is never a good idea for girls I guess because sometime later in their life they do get fat:S. So I guess accept your body happily. As you are thin you can eat as much as you like and what ever you like unlike chubby people.
1 person likes this
25 May 09
I think it is not your problem if you eat normally and nutrtion is enough.i think the lath is good and healthy,if you gain weight ,your health will have a problem somedays.i think some type people is usually thin all life though they do many ways to gain weight.my wife is this people,she is about 160 cm and weight is about only 45 kg,so i advise you should keep your weight,everybody admire you
1 person likes this
@russso (1701)
• Philippines
25 May 09
I reco that you see a doctor first. Have yourself checked because it can be related to a Thyroid Disorder. For two years, I have been trying to gain weight and no matter how much I eat, I was never successful with it. Early last year, I found out that I was diagnosed with Hyperthyroidism which was a huge factor to my difficulty to gain some weight. If there's nothing wrong with your Thyroid, it would be best to still see a doctor and to enroll yourself at a gym. I would want to gain weight, but I'd like to eat the right kinds of food and still have toned muscles. Goodluck!
1 person likes this
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
25 May 09
You don't usually find people asking how to gain weight. I have been where you are. I have a fast metabolism which is probably what you have too. Maybe try milkshakes, Protein shakes 1 a day, eat more protein. Eat more food but I know that is hard because if you are like me I can't stand eating to the point of being uncomfortable. I loose up to 5lbs in a week if I don't have dessert each night. So try having ice cream or cake at night for dinner. At your height and depending on your frame you should weigh anywhere between 105-140. I usually assume that when people ask whats wrong with you - you are so skinny they are just jealous- LOL LOL LOL Good Luck to you.
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
26 May 09
Oh you say you were a smoker -quiting would definitely do it for you. I always wondered why it was alright for people could talk about us thin girls but God forbid we said something about them being overweight. I don't smoke so I will keep having my ice cream and cake when I feel I'm losing to much weight. Right now for my height I'm at a good weight. During the summer I usually lose weight because I just don't have a big apetite I'm usually more thirsty during the summer.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
I have been working on quitting smoking, and while I haven't fully quit, I have cut down to about 8 a day from 20 per day, which is a great start. My goal is to weigh at least 100 pounds, if not 110. You are right though, it is pretty obnoxious when people taunt me for being thin, but I don't run around asking people if they are diabetic or binge eaters when they are overweight. I used to eat cake ALL the time, and it never added anything onto me! I bake cupcakes almost every week. Cake is probably my favorite snack, next to ice cream. Maybe I will have to make myself have MORE than one dessert each night haha.
@muru1950 (964)
• India
25 May 09
Hi rebelmel First you find out whether your weight is normal or under weight for your height. You need not increase your weight just to avoid others remarks.If you are in correct weight,you should be happy about it. In case if you are under weight,you may eat more fatty foods like icecream,butter cookies etc. The concept is if your food calorie intake is more than what your body burns for energy,then the excess calories are stored in your body as fat cells and you gain weight. So you take more calorie rich foods. Happy mylotting
@jazzsue58 (2672)
25 May 09
You need to exercise to gain weight. Everyone thinks exercise = aerobics, but exercise can be anaerobic too - i.e. weights. I'm a qualified fitness instructor, and I was given a case study just like yours for my final exam! I can give you loads of help if you want. If you can afford it, a qualified personal trainer would help you heaps. Try your local Y gym.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
I have actually been looking into getting a cheap gym membership around here. They are all so expensive though! I am looking for a place that has a pool, like the YMCA.I enjoy swimming, so I would really like to find a place with a pool before I commit to a membership.
@jayrene (2713)
• Philippines
24 May 09
gaining weight was never my problem, losing is... but i have a very good friend before who had that problem, he was so skinny, he got teased at a lot of times, sometimes being called bamboo, stick, lizard... lol... he never minded anyway, he got used to all those. then after more than a year he decided enough was enough... lol... he wanted to gain weight. he tried a vitamins called "appetens", and did some exercising too, surprisingly he gained weight, and he looked cuter and he got many admirers... lol you could try it too... he said it will make you eat more and sometimes sleepy... also do some exercising too. hope this helps...
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
24 May 09
I have been planning on exercising a bit more than I do now, but I walk EVERYWHERE. I live in a city, I walk at least a half hour a day.
• Canada
25 May 09
You should be exercising more with weights. Half hour walks aren't going to do much for you.. if anything, they'll just raise your metabolism, and won't build muscle because you're so light. Another thing you could do is get more proteins, for an easy way, you could do it through protein shakes (which are kinda gross, if you ask me), or protein bars (not so bad) or just eat more meats. Things like sandwich meats have plenty of protein and fat to them, so they could help. Lots of sandwiches with mayo, red meat and cheese should easily add on weight.
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 May 09
Firstly, I HATE MAYO! I think it is the grosses thing ever invented and I don't understand why anyone eats it! But, I eat a lot of meats. Hell, I eat steaks 3 times a week. I have been toggling with the idea of getting protein shakes, but haven't actually done it yet. I walk about a half hour a day, but sometimes more. I am in the process of trying to get a gym membership, hopefully one that has a pool.
@Annmac (950)
25 May 09
I don't think people realise how difficult it can be for some people to gain weight. Like you I'm small 4ft 9ins and at present about 94lbs. I'm slim and actually a size 6-8 and have been for 40 years. Being so small means a correspondingly small stomach so I can't eat a lot before I feel full. Great when I'm normal but a problem when I need to gain. When I've needed to gain weight (I always lose weight if ill or under stress) I use high calorie drinks like complan or even diet meal replacement drinks and snacks. I know that sounds odd, but I use them in addition to meals not as replacements. They are a healthy way of adding extra calories and easier to get, and with more variety, than high calorie supplements. As they also contain a balance of vitamins and minerals they are better than eating just high calorie foods that may make the diet unbalanced nutritionally. Try it, it always works for me! Good luck!
• United States
25 May 09
Very good advice :)
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
26 Jul 09
I have actually been thinking about getting ensure or slimfast to drink with meals and throughout the day. I have heard a lot of people tell me that I should put on some weight if I drink those because they are high in calories. Thanks for the input, I'll let you know if that helps me at all!
• Malaysia
25 May 09
urghh...we have the same problem. I eat a lot but still i can't gain much weight and my bmi is barely normal..
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
There are a lot of people out there who face this problem. I really want to try to gain some weight and find a system that works out well for me. Once I do that, I think it would be a wise idea to publish an article or book on tips to gain weight. There are so many women and men who are uncomfortable with their weight, and while there are diets and books out there to help people lose weight, there isn't anything out there to tell people how to gain weight! If I find a system that works for me, I will be sure to share it with you!
• Malaysia
25 May 09
ow..thank u =D plz post it here once u find a way to gain weight ;D
@yoyozhou (356)
• China
25 May 09
Oh, in my country most of girls want to loose weight although they are slim. In some way,you are lucky one. hehe... Hey, in my opinion, you should do some sports and eat more. Then you will be healthy than before. No matter one is thin or fat,being healthy is the most important.Have a nice day!
@rebelmel (1387)
• United States
25 May 09
It's frustrating to see so many girls thinking they need to lose weight. A lot of girls in this country, do that too. I just feel a bit too thin and I would feel a little bit better if I was a bit heavier. Maybe five or ten pounds would make me happy. I eat as much as possible, but I don't exercise as much as I should. I think I am going to come up with an exercise plan soon and see if that helps me at all.
@yoyozhou (356)
• China
25 May 09
Yes,I meets a guy who is very thin. And then he goes to do exercises. Now he has gained 2 pounds! Sports can help to absorb nutrition.