boyfriend's son

Sadly, yes, my oldest daughter has experienced this with her son and ex-husband. Unfortunately it has been in the just last few months that her son figured out finally that his dad was lying about his mom and has started to communicate with her again. She lost out on almost 10yrs of his life because of this but her son, my grandson, is now 23 and his dad no longer controls whether he can see her or talk to her or not. I wish I could be more encouraging but when there is distance involved it is really hard. All I can advise is if there are relatives on his fathers side of the family that can help keep track of him to do that and when he becomes 18 start sending mail that has to be signed for and can only be signed for by his son. It won't hurt to send cards and such but don't automatically assume they will be seen by him because she may not give them to him. Call occasionally and hope he is the one who answers the phone. I wish you the best of luck with this. {{{{HUGS}}}}

I haven't any experience, but I think it's sad that his ex is letting adult arguments affect their child. In any case, can your boyfriend write his son letters? Maybe at the beginning just short ones about what he's doing or talking about things he knows his son is interested in? Not really mentioning the situation, so as to avoid any further backlash from the mother?

It is very noble way to try to make abridge between your Bf and his son. I think you are right in this respect. hope this work out.best of luck

I'm glad he has you to support him. That would just kill me to not be able to see my child, plus knowing he is being talked about horribly by his ex. Yes, I would say keep sending cards, letters (writing a letter is always special because one knows that the person actually sat down and put a lot of thought into it - hardly anyone sends actual letters any more)...Perhaps he could even afford sending something like gift baskets that have sports teams names on them along with some goodies that are usually included. They have so many options now days when sending gifts. It would be kind of cool for him to get something that reminded him his dad paid attention to his son's interests even if he isn't there...But then he might not be able to afford that. I wish I could be of some help. I'm sitting here wishing I had money to send him across the country!

I think regardless of the mother bad mouthing he should continue emailing,calling,sending cards and anything possible to show his son his mother is wrong.At that age children are smart enough to tell a lie and the tuth.

First and for most having your boyfriend a son is not an easy relationship to enter. If he has already a son and it's his youngest then how old is he now?Honestly,it takes a lot of money when your boyfriend visits his son across the the country. And when he does,his ex is always bad mouthing so you mean you've seen how she bad mouthed your boyfriend is and didn't even try to advise her that's it's very scandalous. Why don't you tel your suggestions to your boyfriend whop knows he might agree to it.

Your suggestions are very good. I understand, it is a very sad situation and we don't know what the child's mother had told him about his Dad. Provide your boyfriend all support. Happy mylotting.

it's is really sad that when parents separated the kids suffer... i have had that situation although it's the other way. my mom would not let us see our father before, and she would tell us that if we see him he will kidnap us or take us away from her or something... sort of brainwashed... but that was a very long time ago, and i have forgotten and forgiven all that. your bf is fortunate to have your support in this... yes, your suggestions are good, keep on calling his son. and i suggest too that he talk to his child's mother, say sorry for whatever happened to them or something and just ask that he be allowed to contact his son, it is his right. parents sometimes uses the child to get back at the other one for the bad thing that happened to the relationship, sort of their revenge. and mostly kids dont know this...

i cannot believe it.parent should be the greatest for their children.how your boyfriend do that,leave him sooner.