Many Relationships But Few Marriages!

@emmanola (482)
May 25, 2009 9:23am CST
I was just wondering why the rate of persons marrying seem to be going down the slope. Many persons will claim to be in relationships but many of those relationships seem not to be translating into marriages. What is responsible for this?Another worry is the rate of divorce which is rising year after year. Why are many who are single seem not ready to commit themselves in marriages? Why are many who are married seem to be rushing out of their matrimonial homes? Isn't it disgusting that some persons have married more than two time and still unable to make their marriages work?I need to have answers to these questions and many more which I've not put down. Let me hear from all of you who are as concerned as myself.
1 person likes this
5 responses
• Malaysia
25 May 09
In our era, people tend to chase their dreams. Era before us not getting much opportunities, especially women. Nowadays, so many good things that people wants in their life and when they get what they want they tend to want more. Most people don't appreciate what they already had. If it's gone then too late to be regret. Same thing with marriage. For example, you get married, being happily for 1-10 years, when you find someone you thought is better, you ignore the one you got. Sadly, it becoming a trend to celebrities and most people.
1 person likes this
@emmanola (482)
26 May 09
Our societies seem to have become more vain in thinking and orientation. Older generations were more appreciative and more willing to resolve misunderstanding and other forms of conflict using dialogue and consultation. It seems we are not making the best use of the liberty we now enjoy.
• United States
25 May 09
I think the answer to that is that times have changed now a days its not really required for couples to get married I think that you can do essentialy the same things that you can do while married while your not married I have been in a relationship of nine years and I have three kids and I dont see why I should be married its just a simple piece of paper but everyone is entitle to their own opinion that is just mine Im sure that some time in the near future we will take that great step and that will be great but ther is no hurry we are not going anywhere
@emmanola (482)
26 May 09
Marriage is more than a "simple piece of paper". The real marriage is ordained by God and recognizes and blessed by him. "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." is what the bible says (if you believe in the bible). Not just one flesh, but equally one spirit! That type of union is never possible in a co-habitation relationship. You can never fully commit yourself to a partner that you feel you can discard (or can discard you) like used piece of paper any day you can't resolve your differences. Marriage demands mutual respect, discipline, tolerance and responsibility that is not binding in a co-habitation relationship. Marriage or co-habitation or remaining single for life is a personal choice.
1 person likes this
• United States
26 May 09
you are right it is a personal choice and my question to you is what happends when you are married binded by god and something happends that you cannot resolve isn't it the same dont all these couples today just divorce I mean I do want to get married one day but not until I know that all those problems that we have can always be solved and yes I do belive in the bible and that is why I chose to wait because I the bible just as it doesn't belive in living with your partner without marrige it doesnt belive in divorce so I want to be sure that I am going to be with this person until the end of my days I dont know if I am making sense? but I want marrige but I belive that people do not do it because they do not feel it necessary
• Philippines
26 May 09
Yes, that is true. many young people now wants to enjoy their life as well as very selfish already. And they are very modern in terms of living. I myself don't have a boyfriend yet nor dating because i noticed that many guys just want to have partner and not ready to commit but just want to have relationship due to afraid of lonely. I am very practical and stay to be a conservative ways because i love the early tradition and can help us successful in marriage. usually is commitment,sacrifice, discipline, and responsibility. Just do what you can and protect the family. Outside the family should not be affected your relationship.
@emmanola (482)
26 May 09
I tell every person who wants to enter an important institution such as marriage to carefully weigh his/her options. One should never be emotional about this, being realistic is the way. If you're befriending a person and expect the relationship to translate into marriage at some point, be bold to discuss this with your partner and be patient to work things out with him/her. If a relationship is heading to where, be bold enough to call it off. I'm old school in my believe that any person who clearly demostrate clear ability to take advantage of me during our friendship and doesn't genuinely repent is not fit to be my life partner. May the good Lord grant you the desire of your heart. It shall be well!
@technoobs (408)
• Philippines
26 May 09
All I can say in todays' genre of getting married is that its the issue of having a grand celebration to offer for those who are being into this situation. Most of relationships are still there up and burning with out the hesitation of getting married due to some financial aspects. In my place lots of people have been announced husband and wife by virtue of civil marriage but not yet with the church of their choice. Thus impending the cost of getting married with grand celebration. The practicality thinking has evolved much of today's way of marriage so we often tend to say they are not yet married but in due to civil wedding its legal.
@emmanola (482)
26 May 09
In fact the most important thing in marriage is not how grand it is in term of celebration or the amount of money spent. What is most important is to fulfil the minimum requirement set by each country for persons intending to marry, pay the prescribe fee (which is normally affordable), after the waiting period has elapsed (if any) and there is no objection to the proposed union, the rest is a mere formality. The couple to be wedded doesn't even need a crowd! Both the bride and the groom requires one or two witnesses each and the deed is done! If persons are co-habiting and complain that it is lack of finance that prevents them from legalizing their relationship I don't think they are sincere enough.
@spalladino (17927)
• United States
25 May 09
Before the 1960's there was a stigma to being divorced in the U.S. and living together was definitely frowned upon. Then the baby boomers came of age and we did things our way. We lived together...we formed communes where many people lived together and, if we got married and found ourselves to be miserable, we got divorced. No fault divorces became available in many states meaning that you didn't need specific grounds, like abuse or infidelity, so leaving a marriage was easier. These days you don't even need to hire an attorney in most cases in order to get a divorce. As with anything else in life, the more something happens, the more acceptable it becomes. The sad thing is that I know many couples from the past who probably could have worked out their marital problems if society had expected them to stay together and try hard.
@emmanola (482)
26 May 09
From my experience with a few persons who had problems in their marriages, almost all of them were able to overcome the problems and ended up having fulfilling marriage life. Today, it seems many are not so patient. I believe that living with another person in marriage requires more discipline, responsiblilty and patience than mere "going out" with a person. Today, people want to have the best of both worlds, and that's why many live together without making up their mind to marry. It's so sad that we are not making effort to preserve God ordained institution of marriage, in fact many are abusing it!