caught lying...and still denying it to your face!
By kryzell
@kryzell (921)
Philippines
May 27, 2009 7:59pm CST
One of the worst things in the world are chronic liars. Even if you have caught them in the act of lying, or have strong evidences that they still lied, they will still deny it to your face. Don't you get annoyed by these type of people?
I have a room mate back in college whom I thought was stealing some of my clothes. I don't want to confront her without a proof. Until one occasion, we met in a party, and there, low and behold, I saw her using my bracelet. It is a gift from my mom on my birthday, and was customed made. I don't want to embarrass her, so, I confronted her when there was no one around. However, I was disgusted when she told me that she bought it just recently. How could she lie? It was customed made...so there's no way, we can have the exact same bracelet. Urgh!!! I got hysterical, made a scene and yelled things at her. And for sure, she was embarrassed.
Just recently, we saw each other in the mall, and I am sure she saw me, but pretended she didn't. Couldn't blame her though.
What do you feel about liars? How would you have reacted if you were in my place? Was I wrong in embarrassing her?
2 people like this
13 responses
@charlenmendoza (922)
• Philippines
28 May 09
I dont blame you for reacting that way, if i am in your shoe, i will do the same, or maybe worst. I might report it the authority since you really are sure that it is your bracelet.She should faced the consequences of what she do, she should learned her lesson for her not to do it again. Or who knows she might need a psychologist. She is lucky, your still soft hearted.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
I didn't really think of going to the point of reporting her to the authorities. As mentioned, I didn't even feel happy of what I did. But you are right about the bit that she might need psychological help. Lying seems to be part of her anyways. I just don't know how to tell her, that I have always been aware of the truth each time she lies.
@deborahwd (105)
• United States
28 May 09
Well I dear, we all do things that we later regret, I would have been upset to, for your right nothing like someone to lie in your face, that would have upset anyone. was your name put on it? maybe you can go that way, But some will never learn so even if it is yours and she is going to lie in your face with it on, I really don't think your going to get it back, Some times it's best that we cut our loss and go on, next time maybe put your things in a safe box to keep safe. I no this is not what you want to hear, but you did everything to let her know that you no and that you want ti back and she is still going to lie about I really think it is time to cut your loss and move on, for if not it will drive you nutz.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
It doesn't have my name, but it was design according to my mom's specification, the stines used were the same to my mom's necklace, and looked as if it was miniature design of what my momhas, only, it is a bracelet. She also made soe changes to how the stones were attached. So basically, it has a lot of my mom's design to it, that I would definitely suspect her stealing it, as I don't think any two persons can have exactly the same idea on how to design a bracelet...and specially telling me that she bought it recently? That is really lame.
@deborahwd (105)
• United States
29 May 09
I agree with you on this, no one would ever have the same, Have you called the police about it and see what they could do, one thing I will not deal with and I do not like not a little bit, is, do not steal from me nor do not lie to me, those are the two things I dislike most, My heart goes out to you for I no your mom put heart heart into it. the only other thing I can think of would to go to the police and them them about it and see what they tell you.
@xParanoiax (6987)
• United States
28 May 09
Personally speaking, I have no problem with liars themselves. I don't have a distaste for lying, as it's a skillset that very few people do very well. So, when I find someone who can lie well I'm quite affectionate of them. Bizarre, nonsensical reaction to some, I know.
So here's my opinion in a nutshell; By all means, lie all you like. But don't insult my intelligence by expecting me to believe it.
As for your reaction, it's not an unreasonable one. I don't think you were wrong. It's not the way I would've gone about it, but then I'm weird. You were justified in what you did.
@jane1981 (79)
•
28 May 09
i say well done i dont know how you managed to keep quite unitl you were alone but well done for it. i dated a compulsive liar and what was worse is when he was confronted he lied again and made me believe i was being paranoid then i felt guilty for accusing him. so really well done for standing up to her. if you cannot get the bracelet back i would report her to the police to make sure you get it back and to make sure she learns a lesson - she cannot go on treating people lioke this! doesnt sound like a true friend to me but you should be proud of yourself for the way you delt with it all !!
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
Yes, it really took me a lot, as in, a lot of my patience. When I was in the party, just waiting for the right moment to confront her, and at the same time, looking at her, too confident wearing it when I am around was too much that at the point wherein she denied, I just have to break out.
@technoobs (406)
• Philippines
28 May 09
That is a fact that this king of people never had a chance to put down his pride and ask forgiveness. I don't even think of being with this kind of person for life as they might also ruin you with out that thing unknowing.
I understand the feeling you got there and is same to me that how would I react. Might even worse to some point if I'm in that place as you had.
Just forget it forgive it as you are a true person.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
She never attempted to say her apologies. However, I don't think I'll be needing it anyways, since I have already forgiven her. I am hoping that, the bracelet incident gained her a lesson for a lifetime. If not, then, I feel sorry for her family. I am sure she has kids by now, and I am not sure how you can teach your kids about honesty if you, yourself can't be a model.
@Sugan_241181 (18)
• India
28 May 09
I too hate chronic liars. These people definitely has to be embrassed in front of others.What you have done is right on my part. But on the other hand there is a fact that whereever you go there is a such kind of persons. Instead of confronting if you would have appreciated her that the bracelet is very nice and you are very pretty looking and this is a very good selection of yours and if you can please get me one similar to this, that would have created a guilty consciousness in her (because she knows very well that the bracelet belongs to you and you don't want to ask her directly) and definitely I say she will never repeat this in her life.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
That's a great idea. However, knowing her personality, I know she would have the nerve to deny it the best she could... just like how she got away with using my other stuffs and pretending she has one which is exactly the same of what I owned. The only thing is, when it came to the bracelet, I got fed up, and though she really needs to learn her lesson already.
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
28 May 09
Oh yes, there are those pathological liars...and they way they would shout and make a scene...you would be embarassed as if you are in the wrong. Usually people who are in the wrong, know it themselves and have a good defense line prepared for people who confront them and it does take a lot of guts to call a person 'liar'...our etiquette stops us most of the time and we just let go. I too avoid such people, I am not very 'scene' creating type but I can understand you...after all that bracelet was special and you had every right to expose her publicly. I would have done the same.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
Yes, it is just a bracelet. And maybe if it did not mean a lot to me... like if I just bought it in a store, I would have just let it go. But it is from my mom's. Secondly, it was not my intention to embarrass her, maybe I thought, I just need to let it out. I was fed up, and as mentioned, prior to that bracelet incident, I have already suspected her of using or stealing my clothes.
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
28 May 09
Oh, that's one of the things I also hate. The worst would be when it's obvious that he/she lied because you have proof and he/she still won't admit it.
What happened? Did you get your bracelet back?
That's one of the things I don't like about having room mates, you never know how has itchy fingers.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
I got it. My proof was just too obvious cause a lot of my friends in the party can identify the bracelet as mine. However, I didn't feel good about it. It has been years, and I felt a bit guilty for embarrassing her that much. But you gotta do what you need to do, right? If I didn't push the fact that she stole something, I might never have my bracelet back.
@sameroad (3179)
• United States
28 May 09
i hate liars. it really annoys me when i know someone is lieing too.
i want to call them out but i usually don't. i will just let it go.
but it pisses me off. why keep denying something you know is true?
it doesn't make sense. i know sometimes it can be hard to tell the truth
but when you've caught whats the point of trying to keep the lie going?
there isn't any... you just make the anger worse
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
I agree. I usually don't want to make the issue that big. And yes, pretending not to know the truth will save the person from embarrassment. However, sometimes...or most of the times, it really gets into my nerves. Makes me look really dumb, and I hate it.
@dodo19 (47049)
• Beaconsfield, Quebec
28 May 09
This is definitely something that I hate in people! I really, really hate chronic liars! I just can't begin to describe how I feel about chronic liars. I had a roommate, who was a chronic liar. She caused so much trouble for myself and our two other roommates. It's just really unbelievable. I swear I can't stand being lied to, over and over again, like she did. Just thinking about it makes me so mad!
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
Yes. Could be, that they grew up in an environment, wherein lying is tolerated. For me, I just can't stand being lied to, as if I don't know what's going on, it maks me look dumb, and I hate it. Most of the times, to save the person from embarrassment, I pretend not to know that I am aware how they fabricate stories...then again, that lessens my trust to them.
@carrine (2743)
• Philippines
28 May 09
whew, what a talent huh? LOOL you know what i pity those people whom been doing that stuff, i mean stealing something from somebody just to have that particular thing? gosh! i mean i really cant imagine myself stealing a thing from my friends or room mates, then we accidentally cross our paths, maybe i'll faint that very moment. LOL
do you believe in kleptomaniac? do you think she has that kind of attitude or illness? because shes a girl and its really shameful on her part. because is she is kleptomaniac, then i would understand her, because there's no medicine for that illness.
@t_hackett22 (122)
• United States
28 May 09
I absolutely hate when people lie to your face and deny it to the end when they burn and crash lol. You did better than I would because I wouldn't have cared about embarrassing her. To be honest I would have embarrassed her on purpose. But I don't think you were wrong for what you did.
@kryzell (921)
• Philippines
28 May 09
I hear you. Sometimes, we need to get out of our shell, and show other people that they can't just continue to abuse our patience for tolerating these actions. When I confided to some friends about my suspicions before the bracelet incident, they told me similar things to what you said. And after that incident, some friends even told me that sh only got what she desreved.
@always_natalia (444)
• Indonesia
28 May 09
I think you did the right thing by confronting it directly to her, and there's nothing wrong with that at all. She needs to learn her lesson well. I don't like liars either, they make me sick.
