What kind of person is that?

Canada
May 29, 2009 9:41am CST
If they feel that you did them wrong, in any way, they make sure they do worse to you. 2x to 10x worse. For example: You toss an old empty beer bottle up in the air and it lands on the ground, without breaking or harming anything, so they drive a piece of heavy equipment into 2 things of yours, damaging one and spilling the other. Like that? Do you think this person has serious anger issues? Do you think that they were abused as a child? What causes this type of mentality? Does anyone have any ideas? I want to understand WHY?
6 people like this
7 responses
• United States
30 May 09
I dont know if they were abused but I would bet that they definately had very controling parents there is a high potential for abuse but I wont say always they feel like because they never had control growing up they HAVE to have it always now even when it comes to stupid stuff that dont ammount to anything
3 people like this
• Canada
30 May 09
His father was very controlling for sure. Abusive, too. And there have been 2 female family members that have even accused him of molesting them. Plus, he is a drunk, and had fooled around on his wife. (Goddess rest her soul). But his mom was someone everyone loved. A real doll, ya know? But she had told me stories of how she had chased him around the house with a broom when he had done some pretty dastardly things as a boy. He was WICKED BAD! Always had the cops chasing him for something.
1 person likes this
• United States
30 May 09
I really don't understand this type of mentality.. I am not a vengeful person at all.. I usually only carry a grudge for 24 hours! lol! seriously! if that long. I have found that when I carry a grudge and it's to the point of being vengeful that I am the loser in the situation already.. because I am so miserable.. so I let it go.. so I can feel peace. However, I know people who are willing to carry a grudge till the bitter end.. and want nothing more than to inflict the same pain on someone that they feel they have suffered.. again, I don't understand this mentality.. I will be following this discussion.. hopefully we can find out WHY.. I've wondered this many times myself, just recently.
3 people like this
• Canada
30 May 09
Yeah, grudges are counter productive. I think they do more damage to yourself than the object of your grudge. I know that's the way it works with my constitution, as I have gastritis, which could turn into ulcers if I don't watch it. Besides, I am a Leo. I roar and yell and get really, really mad, but so long as I am able to VENT, then I am able to let it go and move on with my life. There is only 1 person that I guess I still hold a grudge for. They physically assaulted me, knocked me unconscious from behind (frickin coward!) and beat me while I was unable to fight back. They were a young offender at the time, just young enough that they only got a slap on the wrist.... probation and a peace bond for 1 year. BIG DEAL! He was ordered by the courts to write a letter of apology, which he never did. So, the way I figure it, he didn't ask for forgiveness, he is not repentant, so I'm not giving it. Since that time, ocasionally over the years, he has asked my husband if he can come to visit him. I told him to relay the message that I would meet him in the yard with a baseball bat, ready to use it, as he did to me. He hasn't come over yet. *grins*
2 people like this
@MrPKitty (103)
• United States
29 May 09
I think that's someone you should avoid drawing the attention of.
2 people like this
• Canada
29 May 09
So, someone to fear then? Why?
1 person likes this
@MrPKitty (103)
• United States
30 May 09
I wouldn't say fear, but someone to be weary of. If you know a person who freaks out at the mildest of slights, wouldn't you want to avoid them? I'm not into the stress that sort of relationship entails, and I will dump a person like that in a heart beat. And as I tend to take people out at the knees as a warning just before I go for the throat, I don't usually have to deal with other peoples stress.
1 person likes this
• Canada
30 May 09
Well, they have been spouses for a very long time. He is not normally like this. This unreasonable unjustified anger, just seems to have cropped up recently, since his mother passed away. Now he only has his miserable father for a role model it seems as he tends to act like him sometimes. *sad* I tend to take people out at the knees as a warning just before I go for the throat. I like that one!
1 person likes this
@fwidman (11515)
• United States
29 May 09
They definitely seem to have some anger management issues! Maybe they never learned to play nice with the other kids when they were in first grade
2 people like this
• Canada
29 May 09
Well, they were the youngest of 3 children, so the 'baby'. I would think that they were somewhat spoiled, from having known the mother. But on the other side of the coin, maybe the older siblings picked on him alot, too. Yeah, I wonder if he got away with 'not playing nice', so that perpetuated it. He certainly doesn't play fair, that's for sure.
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 May 09
Now that I think about my last comment, those who 'play dirty' are, in my books considered a COWARD. Because they don't think they'll win the fight fair and square, so they CHEAT to give them an unfair advantage. *nods*
1 person likes this
@pickoy (734)
• Philippines
30 May 09
It won't matter to know, we will never understand. It's quite complicated to put our shoes into theirs coz they have serious issues. There are alot of maniacs in the world and even though laws are being enforced they're still their coz you won't understand what's in their minds. Let's say for example, in the mind of a serial killer or a murder, you can kill a person in one shot, why do they have to torture their victim, coz they love to hear anguish and pain... Its not tolerable on a normal person to see someone suffering while in fact they are enjoying it. Its their pleasure to see someone else crying for help... they're merciless... they are angry people as well. Most studies show that they have psychological defect and they can't seem to control it, so someone evil is really driving them to do something that's worse. Being angry is not a sin but beyond unreasonable anger where you'll hurt someone or kill someone, that person has serious issues and I don't wish to know why coz it will definitely make me sick.
2 people like this
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
29 May 09
It can be an anger thing... But also A territorial thing A power thing A control thing Most people today are angry about something. And they usually take their anger on the people who are the closest to them... because they cannot get at the people who have made them angry. It is very wrong to do so... And those people have big issues in anger management. But the thing you are talking about... is more of a power and control thing. By paying you back x10 They are telling you... I am the boss... and don't you forget it They want to scare you into submission. They want control over you. And if you fight back... It is very likely that their next move will be to hit you. Those people are angry and frustrated with their life. So they want to upset everybody else life. Because the only thing which make them happy... is to see someone who is suffering more than they do. They need to justify their existence. They need someone to tell them "they are right". But because of their rotten behaviour... nobody will ever tell them that. So what we have here... is a bully wanting you to recognise him as more important than you... so that he can feel good about himself.
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 May 09
Yes, this person enjoys causing and/or watching the misery of others.. The more they suffer, the more he enjoys it. I mean, most people will laugh at 'funniest home videos' where someone falls down in a funny way, that is pretty universal. But this person gets way too much joy from the misery of others, in my opinion. That is disturbing. And often will purposely cause someone else to be miserable in some way, so they can laugh at them. I don't find that funny. I think it is downright cruel. Small things, yes, that don't truly hurt someone, little pranks, but not the stuff he does. Why do you think this is caused? Do you think maybe he was horribly belittled earlier in life? And this is his way of getting his power back in some twisted way?
1 person likes this
• Australia
29 May 09
It is highly likely that his father was the same. That's where he got it from.
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 May 09
Yes, his father is a very ignorant (only gr. 6 education) man, but will argue with you until blue in the face that he knows everything and is always right about everything. He is a very selfish, cruel, heartless, rude, insensitive, and malicious old man. He hates the world and everybody in it, it seems and is a hermit of sorts. Has a long white straggly beard, but thinks he is quite funny with the cruel 'pranks' he pulls. I have never found anything funny about him, in fact I HATE him. He is the one person in this world I can truly say that about, because I truly dislike using that term.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
29 May 09
I think that someone with that kind of mentality does need to talk to someone about it. Anger is never good and they need to resolve the anger and learn to not be so hostile, or abusive. Did this happen to you? I'm sorry if it did. Regardless of whether someone throws something up in the air and doesn't catch it, it's not littering until they don't pick it up!
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 May 09
Well, it wasn't about littering, lol. Just wondered if you had an amateur phsych eval of why or what could cause such an overreaction. Because it just makes no sense to me. Like when you were a kid, if somenoe hit you, then you were allowed to hit them back, but not worse than they did, equal, fair, even. This person does not play fair and I think is very immature.
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32270)
• United States
29 May 09
Growing up I was allowed to hit back but not always and it had to be fair play. I think most of the time though we'd both get in trouble for hitting. I guess though that someone who hits another more forcefully then the other had hit them, is just wrong.
1 person likes this