How much help do you give a friend
June 2, 2009 12:58pm CST
The question is how far do you go to help a friend? I have friends that are very high maintenance and require much time and hand holding, then I have others who are solid, interesting people, who I enjoy just because they are who they are and don't need help except as we all do when life's bumps come along. I feel guilt when I don't spend enough time with the first group of friends, and also when i can't visit with the second group. Do you have problems like this with your friends?
• United States
2 Jun 09
I used to feel guilty when I could not be as available as needy people wished me to be. The thing that alleviated some of that guilt was doing what I call a reality check. If we over-help a person, are we becoming such a crutch that it hinders them from finding their own legs? And if we do ourselves in by over-extending ourselve to the point of exhaustion, of what value are we then? It also helps to know that this is your one life here on earth, and it shouldn't be spent in ways that make us feel unhappy, exhausted, angry, or full of guilt. Love and care for yourself as much as you do others. It is not a selfish thing : ) Karen
4 Jun 09
Hisavypat, I have always tried to help a friend in need but it's not usually with money because I've rarely had more than enough for my own needs. I always feel guilty when I'm just not able to help but I know that I shouldn't feel that way. As for the second group that you mention, I just enjoy the time I spend with them and wish that I could be with them more often. Blessings.
3 Jun 09
Friendships means a lot to me. I mean without having friends around this world will be a dull place to live. I'll take time to really listen to a friend. There's more to being a good friend than eating lunch together and talking on the phone. There's more to it than going to the movies and hanging out on weekends. To be a good friend, we must be willing to listen. Even when we don't really feel like listening. I am flexible and can mix around with people from all backgrounds and make friends with them.