Did I Do Wrong?

@Mickie30 (2626)
June 11, 2009 1:38pm CST
I want your honest opinions please. I have a friend of mine who I have just organised a singing day with. We didn't get many people turn up on the day, but it was a good day for those that did turn up. We organised it together and she introduced me to the singing teachers who are both Christian. The day had a Christian theme. My friend has nothing to do with my Church she doesn't attend there. So after the day we all really enjoyed it and the singing teachers said that they would be happy to run another day. My Church leader who attended the day and really enjoyed it. Afterwards I got in touch with my Church leader and asked if she would like to organise another day, but this time with the Church. We decided to organise a day and I rang the singing teachers up to book a date. Then my friend rang me who helped to organise the original event. I asked her if she wanted to be a volunteer for the event and she got all funny with me. She started shouting at me and being really awful to me. She said that I had done a really devious and sneaky thing by not telling her that we were organising the event and just ringing the singing teachers and booking a date. Seeing as my friend doesn't attend my Church I thought it was not necessary to tell her, but now I feel awful. My friend made sure that I felt really bad about it. What I'd like to know is do you think I was in the wrong or do you think it was my friend? Any advice would be appreciated because right now I feel really bad about it.
3 responses
@bodhisatya (2384)
• India
11 Jun 09
You know what friend, it is a clear case of miscommunication. First your friend miscommunicated, how? She was feeling awful right from the time she was there at the Church, cause she is not used to it, but she didn't want to be the spoilsport so she just tagged along. Then it was your part, when you formed the perception that she wouldn't be interested again as she is not a regular church goer. It turned out to be a battle of ego in a healthy relationship. So what do I suggest call up your friend and if she really is your friend, tell her that you are sorry. Yes you heard me right, even though it is not your fault tell her that lets forget and be friends again. If you two are really friends and she loves you as much as you do she would understand and she would feel sorry too. You could rock again together. Take care.
@Mickie30 (2626)
11 Jun 09
Thanks for your advice but, I don't think I was clear enough. My friend is a Christian she is used to attending Church she just doesn't go to the Church that I attend and that is why I feel why should I have had to ask her first?
• India
12 Jun 09
i guess you are pretty upset about the whole episode, just be a bit patiient and try to figure the entire thing out in a more relaxed manner. It is hard for anyone who has just been bullied for no apparent reason. maybe you should consider if she really is your friend or not. Do take care and don't let anyone to disturb your peace within.
@cbantly (236)
• United States
11 Jun 09
I think that she just overreacted. It sounds as though she was offended, but you can explain that you simply did not consult her because she did not go to the church and everybody else had something to do with the church. In fact, she was the first and only person you invited who had nothing to do with the church!
@Mickie30 (2626)
11 Jun 09
Thanks so much I am totally on your wave length and think you are so right. It is a shame to end the friendship because of this, but she has also done other things to me. It is nothing that you said why I am ending the friendship, but she has put me on the spot before by asking for things that belong to us and I think that she is using me. I am very upset about this at the moment because I am not the type of person to fall out of friends with someone easily, but what she said really hurt me. To call me sneaky and devious when really she was the one who was doing that by asking for things and saying awful things to me. Oh well you live and learn. Thanks for your comment.
• United States
11 Jun 09
I think your friend is over reacting a tid bit and you should give her some time to calm down. let her know there was some form of miss communication and you would never do anything behind her back to hurt especially something of this matter (Singing lessons) I don't think you should feel bad because things like this happen just get pass it and you will know next time what to do :o)
@Mickie30 (2626)
11 Jun 09
Thanks I appreciate your advice. My friend said some really hurtful things, but I think you are right when you say about it being a misunderstanding.