Dont you think women are mostly dominated by men after marriage?

@dhawanbm (3705)
India
June 16, 2009 10:27am CST
It is a mans world and the women are always at the recieving end. I think the women are always dominated by the men be it out side the marriage or within. She is supressed and is not allowed to be much of her own throughout, especially in south eastern countries!
10 people like this
38 responses
• United States
16 Jun 09
I think it definitely depends on the culture you live in. However, it's been my experience that marriage will change nothing. If a man is dominate before the marriage and while you are dating, marriage will not change this. I would like to think in every culture that there are men that won't be so supressive, however, that may just be my optismtic side speaking.
3 people like this
@mommyboo (13198)
• United States
17 Jun 09
There are 'normal' men and women and there are 'controlling' men and women. My thought is that someone who is domineering and controlling during a relationship or simply dating will continue that behavior, and it would be wise NOT to marry them, since after marriage some people tend to think the other person is then their property.... For anybody who does think this (that the other person is your 'property'), it isn't true, and I hope the object of your affection comes to realize that sooner rather than later.
• United States
16 Jun 09
cultural differences I can't speak for, But my mom always taught me the trick is finding a man who values your opinion, and loves you sincerely :P
2 people like this
@jdyrj777 (6556)
• United States
17 Jun 09
I think the best thing is to just remain single.
@Margajoe (4720)
• Germany
19 Jun 09
I must admit, that does have it's advantages. I tried to stay single, but could not resist the guy I am with now. Stupid me. Oh well, maybe I met Mr.Right. hahaha!
• United States
16 Jun 09
It's usually true. Even in America, some women are still dominated by men in their marriages, thus the reason why most marriages here start ending in divorce because the woman cannot take it anymore. Women in this country are learning how to get along without men. We cannot rely on our men. Any American women who thinks that her man is reliable will have another thing coming to her. He will either leave her or he will start abusing her. He will do something to break her heart.
• United States
16 Jun 09
I think this really depends on where you live. In some countries, women have no control at all, in anything that happens. However, in countries like the US or the UK, things aren't really like that. For example, in America, there are many women in government. Within a marriage, it depends on the couple. Some couples are more "traditional" where the man works, and the woman cooks and takes care of the kids. However, with some couples, it's completely reversed, and then man lets the woman take charge. It really varies.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13198)
• United States
17 Jun 09
LOL! Even in a 'traditional' role where the guy makes the majority of the income and the wife takes care mostly of the house, kids, and other stuff doesn't mean there's any imbalance in the partnership.
@bunnybon7 (37707)
• Holiday, Florida
17 Jun 09
in my day, years ago that was always the norm. either we were taught that way or we married a man that beat it into us but today i see a whole different culture even here in USA. maybe its just my boys but all my boys have the meanest women. dominating. one even has a woman that hits on him and he puts up with it so, no i would say today the norm is spoiled women!!in the USA anyway.
1 person likes this
@ch88ss (2270)
• United States
17 Jun 09
I too hate it when that happens. it astonishes me when I see men in many asian countries that have more than one wife. They have five or more if they could afford it. But how come the woman cannot have more than one man in her life? That makes her bad???? yet the men can? so unfair....
@mommyboo (13198)
• United States
17 Jun 09
That's called a double standard and I don't believe in THAT either. You try that on me and I'll rip something off you and hand it back with a smile. Heh. If a man can do it, a woman can do it. If a woman can do it, a man can do it. I suppose not get pregnant but that's for a different discussion.... People who don't agree with this can bite me.
• Philippines
5 Apr 11
Hello there! There are places in this world that culture dictate what must be done and what must not. There are places in this world where culture is a very strong force in most if not all activities of people. It's sad that there are countries in this world where women are not empowered that they end up always at the receiving end. However, it's nice also that more and more people recognize the importance of women in our society. Because of this, more women now have voice.
@EliteUser (3971)
• Australia
29 Sep 09
Hey, Yea that is very true, but I don't really think that the woman should be that much lower than the man. I do think that the man should maybe be the boss of the house, but the woman should still have her say too. Make sure you have a good day, God bless and Happy Lotting!!
@Ritchelle (3797)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
i think except in a southeastern country like mine, philippines, most asian women are dominated by men. in my country men always give way to women in marriage. but actually as one asian woman said when asked about this on tv she said it's okay that men dominate them for they are not aware of how it is when women dominate a marriage so it is fine with them that men dominate them. i think that quite agreeable...
@MsTickle (24994)
• Australia
21 Jun 09
That is why western women have been fighting for decades to gain equity in all facets of life. It is so not nice to be the doormat of a man. Personally, I wouldn't mind taking a back seat if my man was responsible and reliable, hard working, thoughtful, kind and loving and put his family first. I believe that is a man's role in society. But when a man's ego gets in the way of everything and he puts himself first always because he believes he is better than his woman then life is intolerable for the woman. A man who takes advantage of what he perceives to be his superiority loves no-one but himself.
@dismalgrin (2580)
• United States
21 Jun 09
There is an opposite where I'm from. It seems that so many women wanted out of those kind of relationships that they went the other direction. Makes me mad like when a black person comes to me and is ignorant and says it's because 'my people' tortured 'their people' once upon a time. I usually just smile and point out that I'm of native american decent. They usually shut up real fast because they know what the native americans had to put up with. But, I don't think that we need to focus on TURNING the tables, but balance would be good. I don't mind doing what my man asks of me... but I want it to be my choice, something I do out of love for him. Not something that I do because I'm afraid of him, or that it is somehow the socially acceptable thing to do.
@ShellyB (5244)
• United States
19 Jun 09
I believe it is truth, but I also understand that in many cultures it is the way women are raised. I believe in the USA it can be either one who is dominated by the spouse, it can be both fun and tragic.
@Margajoe (4720)
• Germany
19 Jun 09
That has a lot to do with a mans insecurity. A man that is insecure will dominate his wife. When the wife is insecure too, she will let herself be dominated. Luckily not all men are like that. And it is good that most women now a days talk to there husbands. They don't let themselves be dominated. This way both can be happy in a healthy relationship. Hopefully this will become more common in the eastern countries too.
@nrn2003 (670)
• United States
18 Jun 09
I do not feel that way and I dont believe in that. I do not feel that a woman should ever be dominated by a man just because they are a man and she is a woman. that is ridiculous. I think that people need to reevaluate this world and really see what it is becoming. In the past I think that there was more dominance by males because they used to have women stay home and cook and clean while they went out and made money and had affairs. Now, when yousee the working world you often see more women in upper positions than males. Women are working hard and showing what we are made of. There is no need for male dominance in any situation;whether it be marriage, relationship, work or any other situation. Women are just as good as men are and they always have been.
@applefreak (3131)
• Singapore
18 Jun 09
well i guess it's not the case in my country. here we have a something like a saying. have a son and you lose him to his future wife. have a daughter and she'll bring you a future son. here where i am, the man become closer to the woman's family after marriage. most man also respect their wife and listen to them. maybe it has get to do with education and earning ability. here, woman earn almost as much, if not the same, as their male counterpart.
@andy77e (5165)
• United States
17 Jun 09
Depends on the culture. Here in the US, I don't see that women are dominated by men, perhaps at their own peril. There's a joke in our culture called the "Honeydew Syndrome". It strikes just after marriage. Honey do this! Honey do that! Honey mow the lawn! Honey take out the trash! I've personally watched wives ride their husbands non-stop about anything and everything. We even have popular cultural songs about it. Look up the lyrics to Toby Keith's song "You Ain't Much Fun Since I Quit Drinkin". But I would go on to say that sometimes this leads to a condition in which the women isn't happy. Yes she's not dominated, but I've met women with the "no one has any control over me" attitude who end up with overly submissive husbands, and then long for a real man. Why isn't he strong and a leader? Well... because you don't want him to be. The man ends up repressed longing for a respectful woman, and the women ends up depressed longing for a strong leader man. A very empty marriage.
@Ithink (10495)
• United States
17 Jun 09
Reading this it has to be more of a cultural and country difference. I live in the United States and I dont see it here. Even in my own marriage it would be a cold day you know where that I was dominated in any way. Yes we have the old fashion marriage, he works full time and I have always been a SAHM, yet I handle everything in the household for the most part and it works for us. I think it is just who is comfortable with what responsibility or who handles things in certain ways. It is alot of give and take for us and noone rules over the other.
@reckon21 (3487)
• Philippines
17 Jun 09
It's not about domination. Men are just born strong and wise in judgement. In a family the man is the leader the one who has the upper hand and that's already a fact. Although that power must not be abused by the bearer.
@mommyboo (13198)
• United States
17 Jun 09
What a bizarre discussion. Culturally, I suppose I can see this, but as I live in America, this in MY OPINION is NOT ok, never acceptable, and shouldn't even be culturally embraced. I think it is rotten that ANY woman would ever be made to feel this way or treated as 'less than' a man, dominated, controlled, supressed, etc, to use your wording. Anyway, I can tell you quite frankly that the only time that MAY have happened to me was when I was little (and so I had no control anyway) or with my ex husband before I realized that the truth is, a woman is completely equal to a man AND every woman is completely equal to everyone else, regardless of gender. I would not let myself be coerced, shamed, or somehow dominated into going along with anything I myself did not feel like being/doing, etc. Any PERSON with a brain would agree with me and of course not allow themselves to remain in a situation where anything like this is occurring. I am my own person, and I will always be my own person. If you don't like it, get the #$%^ away from me, because I'm not going to bend for anybody unless it's MY decision. Yes, I do feel that people who are meek and humble and bend over are WEAK. Do I like it? No. I think it is a horrible example and then just perpetuates the idea that it's okay for others to control them and it perpetuates an ongoing cycle of abuse that can last for GENERATIONS. SO, in closing, I do not think that women are 'mostly dominated by men' but those who are need to do something about it because the mere fact that they allow themselves to be treated this way is a slam toward all women and it makes me embarrassed and almost ashamed to be a woman!