Are You Scared To Fall In Love?

United States
June 22, 2009 11:55pm CST
The past couple weeks I have been doing a whole lot of thinking. My exboyfriend even asked me tonight when I was picking up my daughter what was going on with me. He said that I have been acting funny. I didn't really think that I have been acting this way but maybe I have been. I told him that I have just been thinking about a whole lot of things and trying to figure stuff out. Honestly, lately, all I can think about is how I'm scared to fall in love again. It is so crazy for me because all I have wanted for so long was to find someone to fall in love with and now I'm thinking that I'm too scared to fall in love. What's going on with me really? Gosh, I wish I knew. I just have this feeling deep inside that I'm going to start seeing someone and then THE ONE that I have wanted to be with for so long is going to come around and say that he wants to be with me and then what do I do? I guess I'm scared of getting hurt but also, I'm scared of hurting someone else too. These feelings are just so weird. Have you ever felt like this? Have you ever been scared to fall in love or scared that you will hurt someone who falls in love with you?
4 people like this
24 responses
@jillhill (37384)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Yes..at my age I am afraid to fall in love.....I have been hurt too many times and in reality....I have given up trying to find love. It's not that I want to spend my last years of my life alone.....I truly don't....but its a hassel to try and try just to be hurt again.
2 people like this
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
No im not scared to fall in love this is one of the most beautiful things that happen in my life. But choose a right person to fall in love because when the person is not a right partner for you, you will fall.
2 people like this
@x_Jo_x (1042)
23 Jun 09
My last partner was domestically violent to me, so im very scared about falling in love again and being hurt. Also, because of all that has happened i find myself wondering if i ever will fall on love again. I want to, but then i would worry that i couldnt which would then hurt the other person. So i guess im scared of all those things. I think once we find "The One" they will make it feel ok, and we will be able to forget and move on. Thats what i hope anyway hehe, Good Luck!!
2 people like this
@ektarox (67)
• India
23 Jun 09
i so connect with you!i feel the same about love...!i feel these days love has just lost its essence...i don't think there is anything like forever eternal love anymore...you never know when you can stop feeling for a person you loved the most...and yes you can feel the same for someone again as well...so there is'nt anything like first and last love..love can happen again and again..your guy can walk out on you because he likes some other girl..and vice versa...i dont know why has it become this way!i can't figure out anything besides one fact that "love" is the most complicated emotion known to me!!!
2 people like this
@stephcjh (32328)
• United States
23 Jun 09
I have been in many relationships prior to my marriage and none of them were any good at all. I decided to just be friends with the next guy I met after that. It went very well and now we are happily married.
2 people like this
@paula27661 (15899)
• Australia
23 Jun 09
I’ve had bad experiences and for the longest time I was afraid of letting my guard down and fall in love again. I was desperately lonely and yet would not let anybody get too close because if he left me, I would be hurt and alone all over again; I had been through so and much I was wary of possibly going through it again. When I met my husband I kept him at a safe distance by telling him we could only be friends. Luckily for me he stuck around long enough for me to realise that he was worth taking the risk of getting hurt and that as long as I believed that I could handle it if the worst happened I would be ok. We’ve been together for 16 years so I’m pretty happy I took that chance!
2 people like this
@moondancer (7434)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Yes, of course I have felt this and I'm sure that everyone has felt this at one time or another in their life. The best thing to do is not to worry about it. Don't go looking for love. Just live your life the best you can making what changes you need to for it to be better and to have what you want and need. Let what happens when it happens ...happen. It is not good it over think anything and to get yourself worked up over some one or something that you don't know who it is or when it will happen. Live your life. Do the best you can, make your life better,go and take a course if you want to do better with your finances. Spend time with your children watching all of the things that happen with them and the new things they learn. You will not get this chance again. Live your life like no one will be with you, that you have it to do on your own...and enjoy that you have no one to answer to or have to ask, can I do this or have that? When it is time, things will happen for you. Concentrate on you and the children. The rest will come sooner or later and don't worry if it is later....or sooner.
2 people like this
@dragon54u (31608)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Yes, I'm afraid to fall in love. I never want to be insane like that again. It's the greatest feeling in the world aside from motherhood but it can certainly ruin your life. Don't be nervous, don't worry. Just live your life, enjoy being a mom and when the right person comes along, he comes along. If you're always looking for love or worrying about it, that person might come and go without your even knowing it. I'm sure you don't go around worrying about it 24/7 but just enjoy your life, work on enjoying it as it is and reinforcing your independence. Love hurts, but every once in awhile it lasts.
1 person likes this
@Archie0 (4669)
23 Jun 09
loving is not difficult task but loving again with same passion n courage can never happen.. wen heart is broken, a hundred things comes.. its true that we fall in love only once in lifetime.. if yu love again that means yu dont sacfice everythin in last relationship.. yu are carring wants n tht makes yu do same things again.. yu wan complete all the emotions with ya new partner wich yu didnt did wid last one.. love is all bout stories of heart.. heart beats harder than the brain.. n brain becomes its puppet at some time.. falling in love is next to impossible.. but finding new reason is only option to chose... hope yu find better answer from ya inner soul..! all the best!
1 person likes this
@celticeagle (117156)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Jun 09
I guess I am afraid now. I just ended a growing relationship because I found out he was not being honest. It is just too weird. I think the longer you wait the scarier it becomes. That was the way it was for me. This is all a good reason to take it slow once you don't find someone you like and besure that you are doing the best for all before there is a committment and so forth. Take some time to really be sure of what you are doing and where the other person is coming from.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (48123)
• United States
24 Jun 09
Yes, definitely. I don't know what to say besides that. : )
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Jun 09
After my last relationship failed...after almost 15 yrs...I was very scared to fall in love. Then along came a good friend of mine who showed me not all relationships are that way. I had been friends with thsi man for more than 15 yrs. We've been married 2 months. Yea, I was scared.....but it was worth it!!!
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17691)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Hey singlemommy! I think that you have been thinking too much! You need to take a giant step back and stop all this thinking! When someone that you really want to be with comes along you will just know it! You have already kissed too many frogs! You need to just take time and be with yourself and your children! YOU DON'T NEED A MAN IN YOUR LIFE TO COMPLETE YOU!!! You need to be right with yourself before you can even think about being with anyone! I don't think that you are there yet! You have obviously made some mistakes with men and now you need to take the time to think about it and think what you want for you! So when the right man comes along you will be ready! I think you totally need a break from any men! You can't keep rushing into relationships, having kids and not having these relationships work out! Just take it slow and see what's out there! Let someone find you! Let the right man find you and fight for you for a change!
1 person likes this
@royal52gens (5380)
• United States
23 Jun 09
After my life experiences, I find that I don't want to be in love with anyone right now. It just hurts too much. There will be plenty of opportunities in the future. For right now, I am holding back and protecting me. I am not scared but I am protecting myself from hurt and harm for awhile.
1 person likes this
@elokps (138)
• Indonesia
23 Jun 09
i felt to fall in love before coz i was afraid i would get broken heart again but then i thought again that it's not a good idea. I think that if we scare to fall in love then how can we love and loved by someone? then how we're able to have a partner and build a family? so if you not try then you will not know what the result and also if you not try then you could lost the chance.
1 person likes this
@gingerale (226)
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
In life you will realize that the people you meet have a purpose. Some were put to test you, some would teach you, and some would bring out the better, if not the best in you. Some may even cause you pain and heartache but one must learn to move on. So let go of people who can't treat your right and hold on to those who love you back and see your worth. Have a nice day!
@lwy519 (159)
• China
23 Jun 09
Maybe,It is really a sad story when I broke up with my exboyfriend,till now ,I believe he is a good man,but at that time,when we together,scare something,I lost him!I do know whether he has a girlfriend now,I bless him have a better.
1 person likes this
@winterose (39922)
• Canada
23 Jun 09
I was for the longest time, but no not really anymore I have my man now for 10 and half years.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jun 09
No, I would fall in love and be afraid to tell him how I feel.To find The One, you will have to let yourself fall in love. if you are with a guy and the one comes along , it is better to tell your current boyfriend and break it off as gently as you can.I think when you are really ready, you will fallin love . But this isn't a thing you can rush or Make happen.Just keep doing things yo love and love will find you.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Jun 09
I've never been afraid to fall in love. I guess I am one of the people who wears my heart on my sleeve. I'm never afraid to show how I feel. I think that life offers us oppurtunities to find our true love. We simply have to grab it and make the most out of it. People afraid to love, are people who are afraid to risks. They want to be guaranteed that things will work out perfectly, but we all know life doesn't work that way. We all have our fair share of hurt and rejection, nothing is new about that. But that's life...It's no reason to give up finding true love or to crawl back to our shell and hide. That would be cowardly of a person to do that.
1 person likes this
@uicbear (1903)
• United States
26 Jun 09
I would have to say that no, I am not afraid to fall in love. I am however, afraid of having my heart broken. It's been such a long time since I have even considered getting involved in a relationship. My life has revolved around taking care of other people. Now that, that is done, I am faced with the fact that I am alone. I'm not lonely, but I would love to have someone to spend time with and care about, and who cares about me.