How long does it take you to give in?

United States
June 29, 2009 5:13pm CST
What I mean by this discussion is that my husband has been hinting (and persistant as well) that he wants to get a dog. We dont have one, and we do now live in a house that we could actually get one. We lived in apartments for the first 9 yrs of our marriage... and had 2 cats. One of which died of cancer and the other one didnt take to well to the loss of the first one....and we had to give her away. So it has been 2 yrs since we have any pets, and to tell the truth I am not in a hurry to get a new pet any time soon but my husband wants to get a pet --and by that I mean a dog-- for our kids. I know I am going to have to say yes eventually... but I keep putting it off for as long as I can for now!! so how long does it take you to give in to hints and things like that?
2 people like this
8 responses
@lynnemg (4539)
• United States
29 Jun 09
My family would love to have a pet. Thankfully, we are not allowed to have any. We could have fish I suppose, but I am not even in a hurry for that. Even when I lived in a place where I could have pets, my thought on the matter was that I would have to be the one to take care of it and I have enough to do already. My kids always protested and swore that they would do the work, but the one time I did give in, the dog ran away never to be seen again. So, now, I use the same basic defense against the idea. First of all, we are not allowed and second of all, I have enough to deal with wothout adding more responsibility to me. So far, I am winning, it has been four years since we have had any pets whatsoever. I know that once we find a place that will be ours rather than renting from someone else, I will lose the battle more easily. In your case, I think that if you know that you will be the one who has to shoulder the responsibility then you should be the one who decides when the time is right. That is something you will just know. I have become pretty good at standing my ground, but I am not beyond having a soft heart and giving in. If you believe that your husband and kids will actually help care for a dog, then maybe it isn't such a bad idea. If you know that it will all be placed upon you, stand your ground until you are ready.
2 people like this
• United States
4 Jul 09
thank you and yes it will be all me...that much I know, I am still holding my ground but even today hubby made a comment about a dog... and I just switched the subject and it hasnt come back up yet....LOL I know that we will eventually have one...and it isnt that I dont want my kids to have pets, I just need to feel more in control of everything else in the house... we are constantly in some sort of construction on our fixer upper and I dont want to have to put my time towards anything else right now.....LOL good luck to you in the future for when you are ready as well!! happy mylotting.
@HelScream (2828)
• Philippines
29 Jun 09
Well if it was my girlfriend asking then I cant refuse her anything.... I just love her that much that I can actually agree on what she wants.. and if it would be too hard for me to accept this then I would ask her certain reason why she want that thing then maybe I would eventually give in to what she wants if I find the reason logical
2 people like this
• United States
29 Jun 09
Well I have to say... lucky girl!! LOL that is great that you would give her anything within in logical reason anyway... LOL, and I know that for the kids I want them to have a pet too, only I dont want the extra expense right now.... but I am sure we will get one soon. thanks for the response and happy mylotting.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
29 Jun 09
Why not get a dog? It's nice to have pets in your house, specially a dog. They're nice companions and burglar alarm as well. =)
• United States
29 Jun 09
I agree that they are good for safety... LOL, and that is one of hubbys arguments as well. I know we will get one eventually but with money tight I dont want to think about the extra expense right now... but I feel it will be sooner than later that we actually get one... LOL thanks for the response and happy mylotting!
1 person likes this
@latsmom (824)
30 Jun 09
HI, Well I have to say I got rid of my dog last year, I had no choice, he was damaging everything, I thought he woudl be better off with someone who had the time to give him more attention as I was so busy with my children, although he was walked three times a day when I went shopping without him he pulled the door off my brand new fridge and broke my door and pee'd all over my bed, was getting really exhausted with the behaviour. I think rather than giving hints you should be open and tell him that you are no way ready for a pet yet but will get on ein the future and at the moment you are enjoying a pet free home. Try telling him that you feel the children may suffer as a result of your attention having to go towards a new dog and that when the kids are a bit older you will reconcider. I would definately put my foot down if I was not happy with the proposal. Good luck, men can be stubborn bit women have the patience to persevere and eventually get our own way.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jul 09
LOL, yes they can be very stubborn. I have said repeatedly that I dont think the kids are ready for one yet... I know my son is probably ready since he just turned 6, but my daughter is just turning 18 months and that worries me around animals... not only for her but for the pet as well...LOL I am sure because I have said over and over that we are not ready for one yet is the only reason why we still dont have one yet... and with all the work we have been doing on the house has also preoccupied our time so much. thanks for the response and happy mylotting.
• India
30 Jun 09
Normally i give in too easily and sometimes that damages me also i take hints very quickly and sometimes it pleases my freinds and family too cos they dont have to coax me into getting something for them or doing somehting for them..but well for ur situation i think having a dog pet wont be a problem.Dogs are good pets (we have 5 at home) and im sure the kids will love the idea of a new comer and that applies to u as well.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jul 09
I know my kids would love the pet, I just am worried because I have an 18 month old that I worry about around pets... we will see, I have a feeling we will get one before summer is out... but I want it to be on my terms and not just being persuaded because the kids want one. thanks for the response and happy mylotting.
@laydee (12814)
• Philippines
30 Jun 09
It depends really on how I feel about it. If I'm 100% certain that I don't like the idea, I wouldn't give in even if he's going to scream his head off! hahaha.. But if it's something that I'm 50-50 about, then perhaps I could be swayed to his direction. I am not easily convinced though, you must be able to convince me by giving be objective points and weigh in the positive side more than the negatives. But once I'm convinced, I don't regret my decisions. But of course, each one of us has a red button. If you know what mine is, regardless the 100% strong and firm decision, I could do a 360 degrees turn, that is, if you know how to push that red button. Sadly, my partner knows how. hahahaa.. By the way, isn't living in an apartment kind of a difficult position to have a pet?
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jul 09
I think some apartments do allow them now a days, but we live in a house now... we lived in apartments for 9 yrs...our first years of marriage and now we have a house that we got a few years ago. I have been able to hold off getting a dog for the last couple years, and with our cats passing away it wasnt something we were in a hurry to replace. thanks for the response and happy mylotting.
@speakeasy (4215)
• United States
30 Jun 09
As long as it takes for him to convince me this is a well thought out and researched decision and not an emotional one. Some of the things that need to be decided are: Male or female? Puppy or adult? Purebred or mutt? Small, medium, or large? Who will be responsible for the care: water, food, vet, exercise, obediance training, cleaning up the "poop", etc? Do you want an active dog that is full of energy or one that is happy to just "chill" every now an dthen? Does anyone in the family have pet allergies or is someone afraid of dogs? Do you want a dog that is friendly toward other animals (you might want another cat someday)? When he can convince you that everything has been taken into consideration (and it is not all going to be dumped on you); that is the time to start looking for a dog for the family.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jul 09
ohhh, all very good points!! LOL things are things I am going to have to consider as well when it comes time to getting another animal....only time will tell when we actually do get one but for now I am really not ready. thanks for the response and happy mylotting.
• Canada
29 Jun 09
I'm in the same position you are, pretty much LOL I had a wonderful scottish terrior/bichon mix for years and years. He had to be put down a couple of Christmases ago because, in his old age and less than perfect health, he snapped at a groomer that hurt his ear and, because she said he went after her and tried to bite her, I lost him :( In any case, I haven't been ready to get another dog, in spite of all the pressure I get around here to have one. I am self-employed and work from home so the common perception is that, naturally, I have all the time in the world to tend to a new dog (I even get this pressure from my sister! She has a zoo over at her house ROFL and she somehow thinks I should have one too). Now, don't get me wrong... I know in my heart that I will have another dog someday... it's just not the right time. A dog is a serious commitment. Years of commitment, actually, that should never be taken lightly... and until I know that I can give one a "forever home," I'm going to be the hold-out.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jun 09
awww first I am sorry you lost your dog...and in that way too.. that is just to sad. and yes, I am glad that you understand too that a dog is a commitment and that I already have 2 kids... and a hubby (kid number 3--LOL) and a house that is always in some sort of construction zone since we moved in and then we are also starting on the backyard as well...and it will be a muddy mess for a bit before we are through.... could you imagine the mess!!!!! so for now, I keep putting off the issue until I am ready to deal with it!! LOL thanks for the response and good luck to you in the future and finding the time to fit in a pet!! LOL happy mylotting.
1 person likes this