Friendship vs Love...

@LeavaoDe (350)
United States
July 6, 2009 2:49pm CST
Good afternoon my fellow myLotters, Over five years ago my best friend walked in my life. We met through work. He asked me out after he started and I said no because I don't date anyone I work with. He was find with that and he became my best friend. Things developed in our friendship but that is all it is. Everyone we know thinks we would be good together. And we might be and we even tried. But we are better off as friends. He lives 2-1/2 hours away from me and its wouldn't be far to either of us. I think for me personally I was afraid that if we took that step and it didn't work that we may lose our friendship. I value and love our friendship. I don't want to lose that. The distance also played a part in it. He knows this and I know this and we both have moved on in that department and remain best friends. :) If you were in this situation would you have tried? Happy myLotting!!!
13 responses
@Kerotan (42)
• Indonesia
6 Jul 09
Good morning.., I don't know about that..?, but the qustion is, do you love him or not??
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. Thanks for commenting. I do love him but only as a friend. Happy myLotting!!
• Indonesia
7 Jul 09
If i were you, and love him only as a friend, than i should't have tried it. It would hurt both of us, even if the things are going well at the end.
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. You are right and I didn't want to chance lose him. :) Happy myLotting!!!
• United States
7 Jul 09
No I have never had this happen to me but I believe you should give it a try. I dont think you will lose that much. Love is worth so much even losing it. Just the have the feeling of love it is the greates feeling in the world no matter what are the consequences. If you feel love for this person more than a friendship and you should also feel something physically for him also I believe. I don't think that there would be anything wrong to give it a try. But always do what is best for you. It is hard to find someone to look out for you so you must always look out for yourself. Sometimes in life you have to be selfish. Just do what you think is right for you and what your heart dictates you. I hoped I helped you out. Well have a good one!!! Happuy mylotting maria
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
8 Jul 09
Hi. thank you for commenting. I believe the feeling of love for this person was a passing thing. The friendship is so good that sometimes you think you love them differently than a friend but actually you don't. I don't know if that makes sense. Thanks Happy myLotting!!
• United States
7 Jul 09
im 20 and i've been is a situation like that when i was in high school..i knew this girl for 6 years and we started to date when i turnd 19 but thing got bad cause during that time life is hard and i had to go away to college so it didn't last but in the end where still goodfriends as if the boke up never happend at all
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
8 Jul 09
Hi. thank you for commenting and sharing! That is great that you were able to still be good friends. :) Happy myLotting!!
@paying (123)
• Singapore
7 Jul 09
I was in this situation before during my college time. I had a good friend (girl) who was my study mate, she had a boy friend. And we never think that we will married.She ever told me that she wanted me to be her best friend forever even tough if she married her boy friend later. We aware that our relationship just a friend. She even try to match maker me with her girl friend. If we went out together it wasn't a date just between a friend. I care her as a sister. After we were graduated she moved out to other city, we only in contact by phone. Do you know that after many years she become my wife now? The lesson, man & woman relationship no matter we like it or not as long as they care / love each other (and single) at the end it will lead to married. So, good luck to both of you.
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
8 Jul 09
Hi. Thank you for commenting. Congratulations! That's nice to know. Thank you. Happy myLotting!!!
• India
7 Jul 09
i want to share some thing that is a small thing that is one day love asked what is use of you when i am their but friendship replied that because you leave only tear for all but i leave happiness for all so dont fall in love that is my advise
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi Thanks for commenting. Thank you for your advice. Happy myLotting!!!
@geniustiger (1699)
• Philippines
7 Jul 09
If it will be in my case might be I will accept if he offers me love . Its nice to have a relationship starting with great friends. No worries and its easy to love because you are already close to each one. Its an awesome kind of lover friend soon that you meant for each other. I'm sure you will be happy ever after.
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. thank you for commenting. It may start out great but if it ever were to end wrong, I don't think that the friendship would survive. It may be to weird. Happy myLotting!!!
@kaguvkov (1041)
• Philippines
7 Jul 09
Friendship is different from lovers. Of course if you are still friends there is a safe side of communication which is really different if the two of you are lovers or having a love affair. If you are friends, you can also Love but there is a certain limitation because you are afraid to hurt to friend.
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. Thank you for commenting. That is what was realized exactly. Happy myLotting!!!
@tundeemma (896)
• South Africa
7 Jul 09
i think friendship of this nature ill naturally lead to some serious affection especially when you are living in the same apartment, when another guy comes to check her you will generally feel bad or jealous and the same for her as well, so it will be good not to stay in the same place together if you don't want to go beyond mere friendship
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi thanks for commenting. He has found someone and I am happy for him because she makes him happy. :) Happy myLotting!!
@hi2rashid (153)
• India
7 Jul 09
i think friendship and love are the good ones. but we (most of us) can live happy with friendship but We (most of us) can't live happy with love
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi Thanks for commenting. I think that love and friendship are great things. I would like to have both. But with him my friendship is important and I don't think we are "in love" that way. Happy myLotting!!
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
7 Jul 09
there's no harm in trying... if you have already established a strong friendship with that guy, then, i don't think falling in love with him and maybe breaking up with him in the future wouldn't a cause of your permanent separation... if love and strong foundation are present then it wouldn't be an issue if you guys would be more than friends. :)
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. thanks for commenting. That is what some of my friends have told me but we have each gone our own way as far as a relationship is. We are still best friends. Happy myLotting!!!
• United States
7 Jul 09
if i was in that situation i would of tried because friendship is very important to me but i wouldn't mind ruin a friendship if i could find true love. and i never dated a best friend. i told my one best friend i liked him but he didn't want to ruin our friendship. and i hate hearing that cause i would that dating would make us stronger and closer.
1 person likes this
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. Thanks for commenting. I think that relationships are stonger when there is a friendship too. However, I didn't and couldn't afford to lose my best friend, he is the best thing that has happened to me. As time goes on I realize that that is where our relationship belongs as best friends. Happy myLotting!!!
6 Jul 09
I think you should remain friends because when your in a relationship you will have to be whole heartedly in love with each other for it to work out. I learnt that the hard way, me and my best friend also supposedly fell in love, but at the end it never worked out and then everything went out friendship went because it was to hard because I was in love with her and she just thought she was in love with me. Now when I see her, we don't even say hello to each other because its to awkward, but theirs always a smile on her face which makes me smile back.....
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. Thanks for commenting. Sorry to hear that but thank you for sharing. That is exact what I was worried about at the time. We are still best friends and nothing has changed. He has found love and I am so happy for him. Things worked out for the best. Happy myLotting!!!
@jaiho2009 (39079)
• Philippines
6 Jul 09
if love is there why not?...if you think he loves you and you loves him too why not make it a try.it is better to take chances rather than regretting thing u never tried.how will u know your relationship would work out when u are stopping right now.give it a try my friend,know your limitations and enjoy being in love and being loved.it is worth trying for.
@LeavaoDe (350)
• United States
7 Jul 09
Hi. Thank you for commenting. I know that I love him like a friend. I don't think it could ever be more than that. :) Happy myLotting!!!