What would you do?

@anetteh (3591)
Sweden
July 31, 2009 1:53am CST
Hello friends and new mylotters. I have an isssue that I would like to discuss with you. Most of you know I work as assistance nurse at a home for elderly people. We have a 95 year old male with dementia, who recently lost his wife, for weeks he has wondered about when, where and how to handle the funural. He has been very depressed about it. So one of my co - workers phoned one of his daughters to find out. And we did, we found out that the funural was last week. This was the most awful thing I have ever have to experience with my job, not letting the male tend to his wife funural. After being married for 60 years, not be able to close his sorrow that you do when go to a funural with family members. I am shore you all can imagine the feelings he had and for me, I had to leave job, since it was my closer hour and leave it to another of my co-workers. So what would you do, as a family member how should one act and react to this. I am angry with his daughters now, but I have as a profession no right to value this open with anyone...exept here at mylot.
2 people like this
3 responses
@tutor19us (455)
• India
31 Jul 09
This is a very very sensitive issue. You may feel for the poor man, but tell me, in his state of mind, would he really understand what had happened? Would it matter to a person who has lost touch with reality? Just be supportive to him.
1 person likes this
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
31 Jul 09
I have to tell you he got really upset with this, he his perhaps dement but he still has thoughts left...not all the reality is gone with him...I ashure you that. And that is what make this a bit hard to handle.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (50259)
• United States
1 Aug 09
Oh my word. I don't even know what to say. That daughter of his should be horsewhipped.
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
9 Aug 09
the other day both the daughters came to visit him, and they could not understand why he was so angry with them. They turned to me and asked if there was something specific, well I told them the truth, and they got angry with me..telling me that he would not have made it, and he did not care before, and blblablabla....I just changed the subject...did not wanted to go in to that conflict with them. They made it clear he had no business with that funural. That made me even more upset. forgive and forget what ever mater...in the end of life is important
1 person likes this
• China
19 Aug 09
WOW~Married for 60 years!I think the man live a happy life in his most time:)