What would you do ???

@silkyt34 (324)
United States
August 24, 2009 8:47am CST
I have no clue what to do or how to handle this situation... my sister in law just had a baby and it was stillborn, no one knew she was pregnant but her and she had chosen to have a mouth surgery which i am sure was the cause of the baby deaths, but here is the dilemma.. they are having a memorial service at the graveside for the baby today, my husband worked 17 hours last night and just got home I had him phone his mom and tell her that HE wouldnt be coming because he had just gotten home and she said to him " I dont care just stay there and take care of them cause you dont care about anyone else" and then she hung up on him.I couldnt believe it since there i was getting dressed to go, which i am now not doing. Now when she called him to let him know that his sister was having another baby she told him how she wanted to move out and leave his sister an her family ( which live with his mom ) at that house and find a place of her own, well since the baby has died my husband has somehow turned into the bad guy and now his mom is staying at the house. Now the only time we ever hear from his mom is when she wants money we bought a house 8 miles from her and she has been here 3 times where as my sister who lives 2 hours away comes down here at least once a month. so what do i do? do i write her off? do i continue to let her treat us as if we dont matter? i am so fed up with this woman i have already told my husband the next time she calls for money she will not be getting a dime i am so over trying to be nice to her.. please help.. and thank you all so much in advance
2 responses
@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
24 Aug 09
I am so glad I am not in your situation. You know I have heard when you marry someone you are not marring their family however I don't believe that because every thing the family does also affects you. I would pray for her and allow your husband to deal with his family. Maybe one day she will come around.
@silkyt34 (324)
• United States
24 Aug 09
i wish i wasnt in my situation either..lol but i am definatly all done dealing with her and i told him that i wouldnt be going to her house for any holidays he can go but i wont and i really dont want her in my home either but i dont have the heart to tell him that because more then anything he wants a relationship with the old bat
@sehlers (166)
• United States
24 Aug 09
Oh, boy. I don't envy you in this situation. What does your husband think about all this? It's his mom after all. How much of a relationship does he want to have with her? I personally wouldn't talk to her unless I absolutely had to, and definitely wouldn't give her money. I guess the big hinge is your husband. Has he said anything at all to her about her behavior? Is he letting her get away with it? Does he just go along and try to make you the bad guy? These are all things I would consider. In the meantime, if she calls let it go to voicemail and have your husband call her. I wouldn't want to be in the middle of it.
@silkyt34 (324)
• United States
24 Aug 09
he is mad enough to spit nails... he has always stuck up for me when she has started on me and he has told her that she needs to stop acting like a victim because she is really good at that. he told me he is all done with her and i told him that just isnt an option she is his mother and she wont be here for long.. i think he is going to try to make her apoligize tho