Are you happy with relatives & friends staying in your house?

@krupesh (2608)
India
September 9, 2009 12:52am CST
I dont mind friends staying in my house but I cant stand relatives staying in my house.Maybe because of the reason that they talk too many loose talks like talking about some other relative.More over you cant neglect your relatives when they are in your house.You have to treat them as special guests or else they would tell the whole world that we did not look after them properly. Whereas friends are understanding & they wont mind. Your thoughts..... 09-09-09
14 people like this
66 responses
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
10 Sep 09
After my daughter, son in law and my grand daughters stayed with me three different times, I don't allow ANY relatives to stay in my home. I just don't want the problems that arise from family differences. It isn't worth the loss of the people and the love and respect on both sides. So now, it is you can come and see me but you stay in a motel, hotel or bed and breakfast. Besides the fact that I have four cats that love to sleep with people! I don't think that the company would appreciate having something furry crawling in bed with them!!!
@Loverbear (4918)
• United States
10 Sep 09
Hummm....maybe a rat, mice or a snake? Of course there is the way a family friend got "friends" to leave his home. The company was drop in, and they settled in for a long stay. Of course the friend and his wife both worked so they weren't home during the day. The friends went through EVERYTHING! After three days of putting up with the people the husband hit on a great idea...one of those ideas that you wish you'd thought of. After dinner in their dining room, he stated "Well it's time to do the dishes", and took each plate and set it on the floor for the dog to lick "clean". He did that with all the plates, silverware, and serving dishes. He then collected everything and put it away in the cupboard (the friends could see him doing this through the pass through between the kitchen and the dining room.) It was amazing, the "friends" were packed and out of the house in less than thirty minutes! Of course they took all the dishes, silverware, etc. out and cleaned it...but I was rolling on the floor when he told about the way he got rid of the guests!
• Malaysia
10 Sep 09
wow. you have a good reason not to let other people staying at your house without having to be rude. sadly i can't keep cats in the house :( and most of my relatives and friends actually love cats so it won't work :P
@daliaj (5674)
• India
9 Sep 09
I like to host friends and relatives at my house. I have a really beautiful house. I am from India were people treat guests as good. I like to cook special dishes for them and spend time with them showing my neighborhood. My house is sited in a place with lots of lakes and rivers. It is a tourist place also.
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
9 Sep 09
Do you think our origin or our country matters, regarding this matter. You and the original poster have different views regarding relatives staying in the house
• Malaysia
10 Sep 09
i think asians are brought up with sharing and being nice to your relatives, friends and neighbours is programmed by default even if it means you might have to sacrifice something in the process of pleasing those people. it really depends on how the other party acts. if they behave i guess nobody would have problem having them as guests the next time. if they act as a pain in the bleep the host can either treat them well, enduring the pain, or act accordingly to remind the guests their bad behaviour
@Buchi_bulla (8298)
• India
19 Oct 09
Very true. How much ever care you take also, relatives will grumble even for small things and that only will go around the world. But that is part of our life. We have to adjust for these life hazards.
• Philippines
10 Jan 12
Hi krupesh! If they only stay for a while, there would be no problem. But if they stay for an extended time, then, I don't think that would be proper. At present, I have a cousin who lives with us. He is enrolled in the university. He will live here for the duration of his study. We do not have any problem with that as he is helping us with household chores too.
@thaMARKER (2503)
• Philippines
9 Sep 09
that's gonna be fun. we rarely let people/relatives sleep over in our house. only when we're having a grand occasion, that's the only time that we're having people in our house. i'm not close to my relatives ever since or should i say we rarely see each other. maybe thats why..
10 Sep 09
Not really. Seems very uncomfortable plus that whole saying "fish and family stink after 3 days" seems to ring true. My family is nice on day 1 and by day 3 they're in heated arguments. Once we stayed a week at my aunt's place and it was civil war, man..CIVL WAR!
@surekharathi (14146)
• India
26 Dec 12
Happy if they are good friends or family members or relatives but if unwanted guest are came and residing in home means feeling bored. I not treat as special guest but treat as simple guest.
• Philippines
11 Sep 09
The reason I am not happy when there are relatives in the house is that, same with you. We have to treat them as nice guest. We have to be not our usual self, we have to show we are nice people. Me I can't rest immediately because I will be forcing myself to talk to them, entertain them. When I got home after work, the first thing I do is to rest, then eat and write again. When relatives or friends will come, they will change my schedule. Many things will not be done orderly. That is why I prefer no guest in the house. I am not snob, but I have priorities. And they are still welcome to visit our house, but on schedule so as I am prepared.
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
12 Sep 09
So far, my relatives are my friends but not my only friends, of course. Maybe the geographic distance between m7y relatives and me might have something to do with how well we get along.
13 Sep 09
i live alone and i don't want to be around anyone for very long. if relatives stop by we have fun and they can stay for a few days if need be. if they start dissing other relatives, i tell them that's not acceptable in my home ever. then i tell them i'm gonna tell the other relatives what they said -- that shuts them up immediately. if they get annoyed with me for saying that, it means they won't bother me ever again...which is fine for me. i always tell them if they want something, then get up and get it. if they want someone to "look after them properly" then they should go to a hotel! i speak my mind always.
@babyjesus (277)
22 Sep 09
Im happy to serve any relative who would stay at my place only for short time say a day or two. I've already experience having relatives stay and i agreed with you on the many loose talks. And since its my sister who had a fight with my mother before, stayed withus. What really bugged me was she and my mother in law were doing chit chat about other relatives including me.
@SuzyLong (775)
11 Sep 09
I totally agree. I don't like having relatives stay with me because they always find somethign wrong with my house. It's not clean enough, I don't cook correctly, my garden isn't tidy, the beds are too hard, etc. So I don't have them to stay very often, in fact the last relatives I had to stay was my parents in July 2008. Where as friends just don't really care, they just make themselves at home and everyone is happy.
@harmonee (1228)
• United States
14 Sep 09
I don't mind people staying at my house for short amounts of time, but we've had to let relatives stay at our place for extended amounts of time because they didn't have anywhere else to live and that drives me crazy. I never thought I would be so posessive of my home or things, but having the inlaws hanging out for a few months started to grate on my nerves.
@suesan35 (478)
• Sri Lanka
12 Sep 09
Asians normally are very entertaining and like to treat people, especially those who enter their homes. However, with relatives one must be extra careful, since they tend to find fault at the slightest thing and also criticises you after visiting your home. Not all of course, but one has to go out of the way if relatives are guests in the house. Treating your good friends is an entirely different matter. You don't have to do anything special. When they arrive they come to share the joys of cooking together or if not going out and eating together, they're not particular about sleeping arrangements since half the night we are up chatting away, everyone huddled together, drinking coffee, laughing and joking. My friends even clean up everything before they leave knowing I live alone and have to do everything myself. I love having my friends as guests, but as for relatives......
@fan_philo (227)
• India
14 Sep 09
In a way what kurpesh says is true yes some relatives r good and understand some just r selfish and we have to bear with them.....................
@happy6162 (3001)
• United States
11 Sep 09
Yes, I am happy with both friends and relatives staying at my house. Even friends will talk about other friends it is just human nature for people to talk about other people. I do not think relatives talk anymore about other relatives than friends talk about other friends. I will generally just not pay any attention when they start talking about friends or relatives I try to change subject.
@RawBill1 (8531)
• Gold Coast, Australia
11 Sep 09
Our house is very open to travelling friends and in fact we have just had someone with us for around 2 to 3 weeks! We have an online business with a very large forum where we have become online friends with people from all over Australia and the world! Over the past few years, we have had many, many people stay with us, most of them we had never even met in real life before! We have had people from as far away as the USA and Norway! We have only had family stay with us a couple of times as we too are not as comfortable with family staying as we are with friends! We live interstate from our families, so we have had lots of visits from them over the years but mostly they stay somewhere else! We do not have a spare room, so when friends stay, they either put up a tent in our yard or stay in our day bed in our lounge room!
• China
11 Sep 09
hmm, i think i can understand ur condition. cause i also have such relatives. but when i was a child, i did like relatives coming to have visits in my house. because then i felt very lively. when i was growing up, and knowing more and more day by day, i found that everything changed. i didnt like them to talk sth bad abt others in my house. because i believed now that they could talk sth bad abt others before u, they also would talk sth bad abt u before others some day in some other place. but recent years, i'm out. so less to meet the relatives at home or some places. i just to think there are kinds of people in the world. i can forgive them, cause they didnt read a lot.
@malpoa (1216)
• India
11 Sep 09
Not many of my friends stay back for night stay. It is okay for friends and relatives to stay for a few days not more than that. Because i do not like cooking on a daily basis and if guests are there, I have to cook more special dishes hi hi Also i am paranoid about others using my bathroom. Not many relatives come here because we live quite far from most of them and in a diffrent city, but the thing is since we live near airport and when friends or relatives have time between two flights then come over. I do not like people visiting without calling.
@olepmis (840)
• Philippines
11 Sep 09
Yes, I agree with you. Relatives sometimes do not care about you if they are of no use to you but true friends will help you at the very end.
• Philippines
11 Sep 09
i like it when my relatives come over to our house. it's more fun when they're around. i get to hang out with my cousins and i also get to play with the little kids. hehe :)