Would you look?

United States
September 16, 2009 9:50pm CST
I am temporarily staying with my daughter and her husband. The other night we were headed to bed, they were already in thier room and we had said our "good nights." I noticed his wallet laying on the table by the couch where I was sleeping. For just a breif second I was tempted to just look. I guess it was just a curious bug or something! Of course, I didn't that's a major trust violation in my book. But, it was weird because I was just really curious as to what he might have in is wallet! anyway,.... would you have looked?... simply out of being curious?
5 people like this
27 responses
• United States
17 Sep 09
Though you made the right decision I am sure I am not the only one who would have had a second or two of thinking the same as you did. Everyone is curious especially about some one our loved ones are involved with. A question though do you ever get the tug to look in their draws and cabinets?
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
lol! yeah, I always go look through cabinets. It is usually because I am looking for something in particular though, not just to be looking! I have a good rapport with my kids so I can kinda do what I want, but I always show respect of course!
• United States
18 Sep 09
My mother is OCD when it comes to everything and has a habit of rearranging mine and my sibling's cabinets, it has become a bit of a joke, annoying as it can be.
• Qatar
17 Sep 09
I wouldn't do that , why would be curious on people's stuff !! that have been hiding in somewhere in a wallet or wherever !! what if he saw you !!! OMG that would be really bad he would think in something else !!
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
I can't imagine the sinking feeling of getting caught doing something like that. I wouldn't ever try anyway. I respect people's privacy too much! I didn't read my kid's mail or diaries when they were young at home either! Trust is important to me!
• Qatar
18 Sep 09
ya good to know that :) good person who is trusty
@marguicha (90111)
• Chile
17 Sep 09
It´s funny but when I thought of it, I think that I wouldn´t have had any curiosity. Those are not the kind of things that arouse my curiosity. There was a post a day ago about our parents having read our diaries when we were little. Everyone that answered had passed through that pain. I did too. And that experience taught me forever what privacy means. My youngest daughter was very messy when she was young. She lost the key of her diary so she broke the seal and left it half open. I never looked. I would think anyway that a wallet is not very interesting.. Happy posting!
• United States
17 Sep 09
Yeah, the one about the diary really surprised me. I actually thought I'd see about the same responses here, but so far everyone said they wouldn't look. I was surprised at how many would look at their child's diary. I see it as the same thing as this... trust and respecting other's privacy!
@marguicha (90111)
• Chile
17 Sep 09
I feel not respecting a child´s trust and privacy is worse still. It can leave scars forever and change the way he sees the rest of the world.
@xannebull (1806)
• Philippines
18 Sep 09
you're good indeed, it's good that you were not tempted in looking his private belongings afterwards you will not feel guilty of something but when you opened it, i know that you'll feel guilty afterwards.
2 people like this
• United States
18 Sep 09
Yep, I would have felt really guilty afterwards. I think it is very important to have integrity with yourself as much as with others. I would not want to breech his trust either!
@rmuxagirl (7568)
• United States
18 Sep 09
I wouldnt look in his wallet. Like you said that is a huge breach of trust there. I mean most likely he would have the same thing that most people would have in their wallets. I wouldn't want someone to go through my purse, so I couldnt imagine doing that to someone.
• United States
18 Sep 09
Yep, I would never do something like that intentionally that would breech a trust. I also feel like you, I wouldn't want someone going through my stuff just out of "curiosity" either!
• United States
17 Sep 09
Good heavens, no! That is a definate no no in my mind and what's in someone's wallet or purse is nobody's business but the owner's. Remember one old saying the next time you get curious.....curiousity killed the cat! I think you should consider yourself lucky that your common sense took over and you didn't look because what if your son-in-law or daughter would have seen you? I bet they would have been hurt or mad and telling them you were just curious wouldn't have helped.
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would never have looked anyway!It was simply a fleeting thought that I would not follow through with on any day at any time!
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would not look. But I too would be very curious. I would almost be afraid to see something that would not be for my eyes. It is a privacy issue and I would not want someone to do it to me so I would not do it to someone else.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
It is a privacy issue of course and I would never violate that trust! You just can't fix that kind of break! I don't know why i had that one second of curiosity... don't know what I thought I might find... don't really care actually!
@malamar (784)
• Canada
17 Sep 09
Can you imagine getting caught doing something like that? You are a guest in their home, and that kind of behavior just might get your butt kicked to the curb! When you breach a trust, it can ruin the relationship forever. I do wonder, however, what it might have been that tempted you in the first place? What possible thing could he have in his wallet that would be of any interest to you? Was it something he said? Something he did? Something you suspect? You cannot replace a mother/daughter relationship; tread wisely and honorably my friend.
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would never breach that trust! I raised my kids to have and keep and respect with mutual trust and integirity. I think the desire was possibly to know him better, like more a personal thing not really even caring what was or was not in the wallet!
• Philippines
17 Sep 09
no, as i wouldn't want others to do that to my wallet too. i wouldn't get anything looking into his wallet. in case i uncover something, i might be tempted to confront the husband in defense to the wife who is my daughter. if i don't see anything there, that fact will just haunt me having intruded into someone else's privacy and would feel guilty. i might be curious but i should act against doing it.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
Yes, even though curious I would never touch it! Then like you said, how would you confront an issue without him or her knowing you had "cheated" by looking! You would end up uncovering your own dishonesty then they would no longer trust you!
@zandi458 (27952)
• Malaysia
17 Sep 09
No, I won't let my curiosity over power me. It is just not right to check on others personal belongings. I will just put it away and hand over to the owner the next day.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would only check if I had found it on the street or something. I would want to see if there was contact information in it so I could return it to its rightful owner. Other than that I wouldn't ever look.
@lelin1123 (15645)
• Puerto Rico
17 Sep 09
Not at all! Remember "do on to others as you wish them to do too you". That is really a big volation in my book. I wouldn't want anyone going thru my pocketbook or wallet so I would never do that to anyone else. I don't have any type of curiousity when it comes to someones wallet or pocketbook.
• United States
17 Sep 09
I don't usually either, and I don't know why I even had the thought about looking. It's totally not like what I usualy think at all! I would never do that, no matter who they are. Actually, I have had to go through some of my son's things due to his wreck and his inability to take care of business. I hate doing it, and i actually have to. I have even let some things go because I just didn't want to go through his stuff! I'm having to file for another copy of his birth certificate because of it all and my reluctancy to go through his papers!
@Hatley (164759)
• Garden Grove, California
17 Sep 09
macdingolinger hi no indeed that is breaking a trust between you and your daughter and son in law. thats just not done besides if you'started to look And got caught you would be more embarrassed' than he would and he would probably be angry.and rightfully so. really that is none of your business if I maybe blunt.
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would be more than embarrased, more like totally ashamed. Of course I did not do it, and I would never do it! I just can't violate trust and privacy like that! It's more important to me to have a relationship with someone than to know everything about them. Actually, my curiosity surprised me! I have no desire to go through other's things!
@kevchua (1004)
• Malaysia
17 Sep 09
Well, good discussion here. No, I won't. I certainly do not want to open a can of worms - if there are any. It's also an subtle invasion of people's privacy. Besides, I don't want others to peek into my personal stuff intentionally or not, so I'll not reciprocate. "Curiosity killed the cat", but a cat has nine lives - so they say.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 09
Yeah, a huge can of huge worms!! I can't invade other's privacy no matter what. I probably err more on the other side of that equation! I don't think it's good to violate the trust of another. I would not trust someone who went through my personal things, no matter what was in them! thanks....and cats do eventually run out of live!
@prinzcy (5063)
• Malaysia
19 Sep 09
No I will not do that. Whatever keep in the wallet is his privacy. It's not polite to take a peek. Worse, if he find out, he'll be very displeased. This can taint your relationship not only with him, but your daughter too. I know you mean no harm but the other party might not think that way.
1 person likes this
• United States
20 Sep 09
I agree with you. I could never break that trust. I think privacy should always be protected whether or not we know the person(s) closely or not! Thanks..
@jellymonty (2358)
18 Sep 09
I see everybody here is a saint claiming they wouldn't look.. But anyway in my case it would depend what the wallet looked like really. If it was suspicious looking then hell yeah I'll have a quick peep but I'll make sure nobody sees me doing so Normally I don't snoop around other people's stuff but if the wallet happened to be where I was about to sleep then yes I admit I'll have a look.. I might discover something very interesting! Its got nothing to do with trust, if you found a wallet anywhere in the street wouldn't you have a look so you see who it belongs to and attempt to give it back? I know invansion of privacy but you weren't invading, you were invited when he fogot it there in my opinion
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Sep 09
Yeah, I find it interesting that no one is at least curious! I understand honesty and integrity, Hey, I didn't look either! But this same discussion about reading or not reading kid's diaries was a very different story! There was much heated discussion! I was surprised then at those who didn't see the value of protecting your kid's privacy!
@twooten (64)
• United States
18 Sep 09
mother n law you did the right thing. not only would it have been a violation of trust but also a violation of privacy. i know that you all may get along well and all but is a no no. i wouldn't have looked and not only that i would have placed it at there room door to remind him not to leave it laying around. you may want to think about something else. what if the situation was that he left it just to test you anyway? wouldn't that be something. Good looking out mother n law i'm proud of you. :)
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Sep 09
You know, I never thought about if it was a test. I don't think my son in law thinks like that.... but i do! I have set "traps" for people I wasn't sure if I could trust or not! Just to see if they would mess with my stuff!! I would not even touch someone else's wallet or purse!
• United States
17 Sep 09
Well i cant say i would or wouldnt depending on what was i that curious to even think of looking to begin with. Now My ex i did it to him all the time because i had my reasons and i told him the next morning i did he never got mad and even after i found another girls number and even called the girl to find out who she was and she told me they was talking and so forth and of course i confronted him on it and surprised he didnt deny it of course he told me the truth which i was fairly mad about it and upset but i also respected him for telling me the truth and not lying about it. But as i said i cant say that i would or wouldnt just depending on the reasons why i was that curious to even think about looking in the first place.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Sep 09
Oh, man that would be awful to find a phone number or something! What a mess that could have been real fast, especially if it was like a girl from church or work he had her number... that would be funny in such a non-funny way!!
• United States
17 Sep 09
I certainly can say that i would have been tempted, but would not have looked. I think it is in human nature to be curious, but curiousity is a two edged sword. One one side, you might find absolutly nothing of interest..but then you feel the guilt of having taken the chance to look, hoping to find something interesting, or else you will find something bad, that you really wished you hadnt found, and that is even worse, because then you not only have the guitly scret f being a snoop, you have to hide whatever it is you found out!
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Sep 09
lol! I hadn't thought about it quite like that! What if I had looked and seen something I felt I had to hide... that would be an awful thing to live with.
17 Sep 09
I would have wanted to look as I like having a nosey at things like that but I don't think I would have done it. I'd feel too guilty!
• United States
17 Sep 09
I would feel too badly if I did it there is just no way I could do something like that!
@drakkar (50)
• Philippines
17 Sep 09
Its a good thing that you were not able to see it, its not a good thing at all. Keeping a good manners is still the best.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Sep 09
Honesty is always the best! I would never have touched it... I am just not made like that!