how to know mr. right?

September 21, 2009 8:40pm CST
me and my boyfriend is already 1 year now and we became very close. i already think of making him my ideal man to be my husband. but when we fight that feeling changed. when we fight because of his fault my feeling of marrying him changed. this makes me think if i will marry this guy do we have a good relationship together? because as early as now we always fight how sure that won't happen in the future. what really is the basis of choosing mr. right?
1 person likes this
13 responses
@bing28 (3798)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
Maybe you're just arguing in some things, but thats normal. You have to be adjusted to each other. Though much better if you're compatible already upon knowing each other, thus less fights and misunderstanding. I think he is mr. right if you don't want to lose him as he loves and understands you and you do the same you may argue on things but you end up to a better conclusion without hurting each other. There is a respect for one another, thoughtful and responsible. Would always do things that pleases you, he is not mr right if he keeps on fighting with you.
@jules67 (2790)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
I agree with you that fighting is part of the relationship. In fact sometimes, it spices the relationship.
• Malaysia
22 Sep 09
1 year is too short.. you need at least a few years i think. When you guys fight, is it a rational fight? like you guys sit down and argue or it involves aggressive physical contact between you and him? Think wisely first before deciding on things. Give him a few more years time to sort things out. If he is THE guy, he will defenitely be there for you at all the time. Good Luck :)
22 Sep 09
we always argue because i am kinda perfectionist. i want things to be always perfect thats why but our fight doesn't involve physical actions just verbal.
@jlamela (4909)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
Changing one's feeling towards someone is not a good indication of a genuine Love. When you truly love someone, the feeling is always unconditional, it won't change even if you fight. Try to reassess yourself first why you love him. If you have variety of reasons then it's not genuine love and usually conditional love falls under "infatuation" category. Finding mr. right has no reasons or not out of choice. Mr. Right only comes when you are fully prepared to take higher responsibilities in life and be able to handle complexities. Remember that genuine love is not an emotional duty but a gift from God. Mr. Right only resurface if everything is in the right place at the right time. If your feelings began to change as you fight, you maybe thinking only for him right now as a "lover" not as a "soul mate". The opposite of Love is not hatred but indifference.
22 Sep 09
what you said really opened my mind. i think we should know each other more. thanks
@musicman6 (2371)
• United States
22 Sep 09
cutepink, 'jules' is right! There is no such thing as Mr. Right! You don't pick a person and hope he 'turns out right', you enter a relationship and you form the relationship to be right! But you do have to make a decision,as to whether this other person is going to help you in making this relationship a success! You have to do some serious thinking, Will he change? Will he be productive? Will he support you in your mission? Will you be able to live with this person, for a long time, will he give you space? Is he reasonable, or is he explosive? Just remember, the decision you make, isn't in concrete, when you feel that things are not going to prosper, you have to be intelligent enough to discontinue a relationship that is not prospering!
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
there is no such thing as mr./ms. right, both of you are obliged to adjust in order for the two of you to treat each other as the right one...
@EchoLin (24)
• China
22 Sep 09
It is very hard to judge who is our MR right.before we meet him,we may meet many Mr Wrong who hurt us,make us unhappy.Less people meet Mr rihght at first time although we all are wish to .And maybe we can not know our Mr Right if we do not met the wrong person before meet them.I believe there is waiting for me, I will meet him som time ,some where.
22 Sep 09
Relationships are not easy, everyone fights. Unless you are going at each others all the time its a normal feeling. You know its Mr. right when you are able to over look those minor set backs and see the whole picture. Everyone has a different basis for finding Mr. right, just follow your heart.
• China
22 Sep 09
If you do quarrel and then you get well again, in my opioion this is a good relationship. Some friends do not even quarrel, this is not a good sign. Everybody will get angry no matter how kind you are, especially to the people you have a good relationship to like your parents or your husband or wife. Sometimes quarrels just make you two get close and know more about each other. If you can bear this or you like this then you two surely will have a very bright future. But if you do not no matter how deep you two do feel to each other you will have to break up for some reasons. Quarrels and fights are just must in the process of getting together.
@irene3184 (900)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
I think we have almost they same situation but my case is its normal. Sometimes me and my boyfriend fight because we have different perspectives in life that we are trying to stick on it with a better understanding to each other. We already in our 8th months, the more we fight and discuss our own opinion, the more we know each other and love what we never understand. Acceptance is a keyword that you can have a good and better relationship. I believe that there is nothing what we call mr. right but a right person for us who can accept us of who we are and understand our faults.
@superaren (209)
• China
22 Sep 09
You should believe.
22 Sep 09
cutepink_13 hahaha Mr. right is the best man in our mind,and we only imagine that guy, it is impossible in our real life. when i was young, i imagine Mr right, but now i can't now we need seek that man who can strive togather, understand and tolerate each other, it is ok for me. in other words, Mr right is my dream in fact, fight is the normal thing, maybe it can help increase your relationship, happlily face the couple life.
@jules67 (2790)
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
Hi cutepink_13. I believe that there is no such thing as Mr. Right. I does not exist at all. Right timing, there is. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. If both of you feel that it is the time for you to get married and both of you are willing to accept that commitment, then go and get married. Commitment, being there together no matter what happens. Whether you are fighting or not, things can be resolved if you are committed to make the marriage work. That is the important thing.
• Philippines
22 Sep 09
you would know that you've already found Mr. right if you have someone that have accepted you for who you are and what you are.