tactless things to say when a new boyfriend undresses for the first time

@jb78000 (15173)
September 30, 2009 10:44am CST
i am compiling a little book of inadvisable things for women to say during that awkward first occasion. so far i have got: awwwww! that is so cute, i didn't know you could bonsai them and today sunshine we will be working through positions 5-98 of the karma sutra inclusive i'm sure you like threesomes so meet my friend, Big Steve everybody likes toys at this time, here are mine [bring out a half finished jigsaw, a teddy, some lego and a spongebob] anymore ideas would be gratefully received.
2 people like this
16 responses
@xfahctor (14131)
• Lancaster, New Hampshire
30 Sep 09
ROFLMAO!!!!!!! "Now go fry the bacon" "ROFLMAO" "could you turn more towrds the south wall, the camera can't quite see you" "put that away before you put someones eye out" "here, hook these up to it and push that button"
3 people like this
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
isn't number one popular amongst demons when they encounter lost souls in the depths of hell?
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
30 Sep 09
OH idk... You're kidding, right? Big hands, big... Well that one's not true! Well so much for what they say about *insert race or nationality here* men Put it back on! uncontrollable laughter Is that enough?
1 person likes this
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
good ones. all on the same theme but still great.
1 person likes this
@dawnald (84146)
• Shingle Springs, California
30 Sep 09
how about: put your shirt back on, the glare is blinding me or geez did you have a hair transplant there?
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
and of course. aaah. so that's where all your hair went.
• United States
7 Oct 09
This discssion just mad me but out laghing. I have just a ouple some nice ones and somemean ones lol ones guys would call nice " you really are hung like a horse" "Big feet dose meann big meat in your case anyhow" some what mean ones "Hunny and what do you plan so do with that" "am I going to be able to feel anything" "wow it looks like a pencil" "I think I better drive back to the corner and pick somebody new up cuz you just aint going to do" there are some happy mylotting
1 person likes this
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
brilliant and i love the last one especialy.
@ZephyrSun (7385)
• United States
1 Oct 09
You're crazy!
1 person likes this
@jb78000 (15173)
3 Oct 09
and you my friend are bananas...
@babyangie27 (5177)
• United States
30 Sep 09
OK here are mine "um you know what I forgot I have to go to work now" "Where is it?" "I have to get a picture of this and put it on MYSPACE!" "do you mind if the dog watches I am trying to teach him a few new tricks?" "wow I didn't know they came in extra small!!!"
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
very disturbing the dog one. perhaps i don't want to know any more about what the 'new tricks' are...
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Sep 09
What can I say my mind is a disturbing place when I am home alone care for a cookie? the purple bunny makes lovely ones with sprinkles!
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
don't really like cookies but thanks anyway.
1 person likes this
@thea09 (18327)
• Greece
30 Sep 09
Would you prefer to keep your thermal vest on, so your socks don't get lonely
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
get a grip thea. there is not a man alive who, no matter how much like a greek god he was to begin with, can not be made sexier with the addition of some seductive wooly accessories. socks, vests, bobble hats or indeed mittens
@thea09 (18327)
• Greece
30 Sep 09
Goodness help us, he'll be insisting on making up a threesome with his teddy next. And I wasn't thinking of Greek men.
@jb78000 (15173)
30 Sep 09
x - nonsense. they go perfectly together, particularly when he wants to look silly. thea - what do greek men keep on then?
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
1 Oct 09
I think you said more in this discussion. I will add only one that is; uhhhhhh so hard. Have a nice day!
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
erm, this discussion is really things that you shouldn't say. i'd guess most men would quite like that one...
@aerous (13474)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Some men don't say more being vulgar as it is, my friend. Need to quite in that way of discussion because your girl and I don't know you feel and don't like to be a burden in this discussion...have a nice day!
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
ok this is just a really silly discussion. mainly an excuse for us girlies to have a laugh at men although none of us would actually say these things in real life. probably. say whatever you feel like - you'll be amazed by how difficult it will be to out-vulgar some of the women who have joined in here.
• United States
30 Sep 09
*looks at it and shakes head* I sure hope you are good with your tongue! Alright, let's get going, because my favorite TV show is on in 5 minutes, and I can't miss a minute of it. Man, you could make a horse jealous with that thing!
@jb78000 (15173)
1 Oct 09
that would be of course a sea horse?
• United States
1 Oct 09
Dogg Rabbit - I was going for that one being a positive one, but I like sea horse better.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Oct 09
Actually, I don't get into reality TV, and I would NEVER choose TV over "other things".
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Oct 09
I got naked one time for a girl and she asked "Who do you think you are going to satisfy with that thing? I relied, "MEEEE"
@jb78000 (15173)
1 Oct 09
good comeback although i suspect there may be a bit more to that conversation. what did she say next?
• United States
1 Oct 09
She replied, "Well what about me?" I replied I won't hold you back!!
@p1kef1sh (45640)
1 Oct 09
"That reminds me. Did you eat the last breadstick?" "What colour do you think I should paint this room?" "Make sure that the Police don't see that. They'll arrest you for carrying an inoffensive weapon." (To those of us that are uncut) "That reminds me. Would you look under the hood of my car". That'll do for now. I've enjoyed reading some of the others.
• India
1 Oct 09
You are right p1kef1sh, I have also enjoyed a few of the responses of the readers. At the same time, I was not able to understand a few, including "That reminds me .Would you look under the hood of my car"
@p1kef1sh (45640)
1 Oct 09
Because he is not circumcised Ramesh.
@irishidid (8734)
• United States
1 Oct 09
There is this line from an old joke: "Oh my god, it's all pink and wrinkled."
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
what's the rest of the joke?
@irishidid (8734)
• United States
8 Oct 09
A young couple was getting married and the bride asked her mom to go out and buy a blue nightie and iron it. The mother waited for until the last minute and couldn't find a blue one so settled for another color. She threw it in her daughter's suitcase. On the wedding night the couple were both virgins so they decided they would each get undressed while not looking at each other. The bride pulled out the nightie and said "Oh my god, it's all pink and wrinkled." "You promised not to look!" It's an old joke. Works better said than read.
• United States
1 Oct 09
Here is a few: *giggle* then "oh, how cute!!!!!!" staring wide eyed and said "I have a headache" rolling you eyes "damn i thought it was bigger than that"
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
pretty good and i like the addional acting tips in there.
@PeacefulWmn9 (10424)
• United States
1 Oct 09
Hi Jb. Aren't we the curious bunny!! Hm, my list: Point, at anything on his body, and say: What is THAT?? Fall down laughing, preferably until you cry. Would you like to borrow my razor for your back? I'll help shave it. Hm, I see why they call you teddy bear. Does it always look like that? It doesn't match the hair color on your head! I bought you, um, well...I got you this manual for Christmas...no offense, but... Karen
@jb78000 (15173)
1 Oct 09
nice list karen.
30 Sep 09
well..i don't think that "magic of the moment" consists in what you say,but in what you do,react,etc.sometimes words can be heard without being prounounced.it all depend of feelings.
@jb78000 (15173)
8 Oct 09
hiya aetakme. this was a jokey discussion about things women should NOT say to new boyfriends. btw of course i have never said any of them...
@doormouse (4619)
30 Sep 09
you could just laugh uncontrolably
• India
1 Oct 09
You want the poor man to commit Hara kiri.
@crys7881 (267)
• United States
30 Sep 09
"THAT is not going to satisfy me so you might as well get dressed and leave now" "Shaving your hair down there doesn't make it look bigger...sorry" "We should just stick with being friends" "You don't mind if my brother joins us do you?" Gross I know =) "I got naked for that?"