Ever Had A One Night Stand & Not Letting Your Partner Know ....?

@rtslvtwy (1088)
Malaysia
October 4, 2009 4:11am CST
Have you ever "cheated" on your partner before where you had a one night stand with another person while you are still attached with your partner? Is that called cheating? Or, it's just curious exploration of some contact sports with another person in bed? Is it okay to do such things?
2 people like this
18 responses
• India
4 Oct 09
It depends on how you take these things. I personally have no opinion on one night stands and I do not find anything wrong in it. It is not something new happening in any society. Those who are against it has only one answer, that it is bad. Just because their religion or society objects to it,does not mean it is bad. In fact i am against the institution of marriage itself. Let people choose what they want. also dragging you partner into something which he/she does not know is just plain foolishness and digging one's own grave.
• India
4 Oct 09
No. I am NOT one in a million. I am just a plain old man. times have changed. people's views have changed, attitudes have changed, the trends are changing. there are still lots of people in India who do not entertain such ideas. all that I wanted to convey is lets not impose anything on people. let them take an independent stand of their own.
2 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
Guess that you think differently even though you are from India. I thought that India would be a more conservative and not allow she doings. You must be the one in a million.
2 people like this
• United States
5 Oct 09
Yes it would be cheating! If you have a partner and you were to 'explore' company with another woman in bed.. how can you not see that as cheating? I could never ever do that. just the idea of sneaking around and sleeping with someone that was not my partner disgusts me deeply. How can anyone be that careless and selfish?
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
I guess you are right. I agree with you on this but I can't see how others can do it openly and still thinks as if there is nothing wrong with it.
2 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
4 Oct 09
If you are in a relationship and bed down with someone else BEHIND YOUR PARTNERS BACK then yes its most definately cheating...Have i done that to my husbnad? No not in the 11 yrs we've been together..In fact I've not cheated on a partner since I was a teenager..
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
You must be a very loyal person and loyal to your husband. Great to have you as a wife ..... i mean your husband. What if your husband can't fulfill your expectations? would that change how you think today ?
2 people like this
@modstar (9605)
• Philippines
5 Oct 09
i think that's cheating as what most people here would agree with. i don't think it's a contact sport too! lol! i have done one night stands but those were the times when i was single . i have slept though with another woman but i never touched her.
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
You mean you slept with other women on the same bed and never touched her? Was that before or after you were married ?
1 person likes this
@maezee (42003)
• United States
4 Oct 09
Yes, one night stands are definitely cheating in my opinion. But what's "okay" is really up to you and your spouse. Some people are in open relationships, which allow meaningless flings to be part of their marraige. I think getting intimate with anyone other than your husband/wife is considered cheating, and I think most people think similar thoughts.
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
I would think of the same as well in fact. I am asking this is that I have friends who just thinks it's normal entertainment for them and not letting their partner know about it. I have another friend who went calls for the same hooker so many times that she ended up as his wife ....
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
I think, if you are in a relationship and committed to someone, that's definitely a cheating. For me, it's not okay to do that. Have a nice day :)
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
I do agree too ... but in where I work and my customers most of them think differently but most of such are not told to their wives.
1 person likes this
• India
4 Oct 09
no dear friend.i do not think so that it is ok.because in india we beleive in faith.we never cheat our life partners.u can not believe my words but one think i would like to tell u that in india DIVORCE IS NOT SEEN IN GOOD EYES.people hate those husband and wife who diverce each other???we think marriage means bond between two soul for ever//r u astonished !!!!!!but this is fact in india.
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
I think it's good that I do hear most from India have such good culture to not sleep with any other person besides his/her own spouse. Some countries may not practice the same thing I guess.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Oct 09
rtzlvtwy would you won't it done to you????????????? put your self in your partner's place. put the sports bulls--- aside and relise, that if you are doing this know. your not comitted to your partner at all. your only fooling your self. you will get cought. then what?????????. firemountain.
2 people like this
@sublime03 (2339)
• Philippines
4 Oct 09
It is already a given that you should never cheat on your significant person. The principle goes like this 'Do unto others what you want them to do unto you' thus; cheating should never be an issue between couples. If you love a person so much there should never be a time that you will chrat on them.
3 people like this
@indybaty (368)
• Panama
5 Oct 09
hello rtslvtwy, (what does that stand for?) ok, nevermind, probably pushing that too far.. hahahahahahaha well, here goes my opinion. Because the trends are changing and times are changing and all of that, a lot of stuff that was considered before to be a BIG NO attached to it, is now being pondered at and considered a possibility to do so while being attached, person would think, its not a bad thing as long as the sentimental other doesnt find out? Sure why not right? Let me tell you this. For me, in different societies or no matter where your at or what religion you are following, to stay true to your partner wether attached by engagement or feeling, is whats right. And THAT is cheating, no matter how you try to look your way around it, no matter what excuse is given, its cheating. So many things can go WRONG by just cheating. 1. Temptation of doing it again. That you do a one night stand, doesnt mean you might only do it once. After someone does something has controversial or forbidden as that, its only human nature to want to continue if you are not true to your convictions and realize it was a mistake. It can develop into an affair in the worse scenario and you have to end up living a double life. 2. STD´s or sexually transmitted diseases. You think, hey one night stand wont affect me and I could probably tell who´s sick and who isnt... NO, a one night stand is just that, a one night stand you dont know with what kind of person you are sleeping with, most likely if that person is sleeping with you, it means that person slept with probably some other 20 or more people before you that from 1 out of them may have an STD that you take with you and then develops... and you think "hmm what happened here?" 3. You got away with it... then what? If you get away with it, you figure it was fun, not doing it again, going to stay with my sentimental other and all would be fine... but that stays in you.. someone else´s aura or smell stays on you. And if you have a consience, thats something that eventually you will say if not to your sentimental other then to someone else just because you want forgiveness for making a mistake. And well, thats what I think. Happy Mylotting
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
6 Oct 09
Very well said and stated .... I think you have it all written well ....
1 person likes this
@kitty42 (3923)
• United States
5 Oct 09
Hello This is cheating in every sense of the word, its not o.k to sleep with others when you are in a relationship with someone else, its unfair to your partner and anyone who does this is wrong, no matter how you try to justify your actions you are wrong, what if your partner did this to you, would you think they were cheating or would that be o.k if you think it would be ok then share this with them and tell them they can do the same it would be fair, right? lol Thank you.
2 people like this
• China
5 Oct 09
I think you did a wonderful secret investigation without spending a buck.Congradulations.People becomes more open minded and one night stand is becoming a social phenominum,to me I will do that myself when I stay the normal relationship with my future wife but I could accept others to talk about it.That can be slso used to judge which kind of poeple he or she is.
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
What if your wife finds out? do u think she will accept it as well ?
1 person likes this
5 Oct 09
it is not okay to cheat. if one likes to explore then he doesn't deserve anybody. he better have a dog with him. for me being in a relationship, must involve commitment, meaning one should be faithful with the partner not just loyal but faithful.
2 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
5 Oct 09
Being loyal and faithful is key to any relationship.
1 person likes this
• India
4 Oct 09
hi, i am yet not in a relationship and like all good indian girls i would stay virgin till my marriage. About cheating or one night stand , no i would never ever do it because it is degrading yourself. your partner and all the teachings yiur parents installed in you from the childhood and it also would disrespect everything you stand for.. so i would never ever cheat even for a moment leave aside whole night.
3 people like this
@rtslvtwy (1088)
• Malaysia
4 Oct 09
That's a very good disciple you have. I am proud of you. Your future husband must be very happy have a girl like you. I guess it also depends on the brought-up and the culture that affects all such thinking.
2 people like this
• Italy
7 Oct 09
Its not our culture and this thing is ruining the social society of west. I would never do it. London now called the capital of divorces and 80% of these divorces are due this kind of droughts.
@skysuccess (8858)
• Singapore
4 Oct 09
rtslvtwy, When I was courting my wife, I was grateful and glad that I did not have much distractions that would lead me into bed with another woman. This is probably because I wasn't a hunk or handsome enough. Anyway, I was literally trying to carve my career path during that time. IMHO, I feel that it would be outright cheating when you sleep around whilst being attached. No two ways about it. I think as a man, we should be a man of our words and more importantly our deeds as well. Cheating is just playing with fire and will harm our relationship. Not forgetting, breaking the trust with our love one.
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
5 Oct 09
I will never have a one night stand. The physical relationship is meant to be something special shared between two people who are in a committed (married) relationship with each other. Otherwise, it's a cheap experience of simply using someone in a selfish way. Not for me. I'll remain committed to my wife, only my wife, and no one else other than my wife. I'm a Christian, so that's the way I live.
2 people like this
@taraelocin (1138)
6 Oct 09
I never cheated on my husband and can't imagine that I'll ever will. Of course you can't say never, but I just can't imagine it. I think having a one night stand is certainly cheating. Unless you are both aware of it and agreed that you will have some fun on the side. In which case there is no need to keep it a secret.