Can a person changed his personality for his love one?

Philippines
October 7, 2009 2:20pm CST
Is it really possible to change the person we love? Can an in-love person change for his love one? This is what I have learned: 1. If you demand a person to do something that he is not, he might follow you but RELUCTANTLY and when you are not around he will again do what he chooses. 2. I learned that change comes from the person himself. For a person to change his bad habits, he must admit it first and decide for himself. 3. Never expect that you can change a person because a person changed only by his own will.
3 people like this
28 responses
8 Oct 09
i dont like the idea of changing one's personality for the sake of a loved one. one must change for himself so that others can benefit from the change too.
1 person likes this
@kitty42 (3923)
• United States
9 Oct 09
Hello I think its easier to change a habit but your personality is another story, you may try to control certain things about yourself but eventually the old you will show up again, this is what I have seen habits yes, personality nope. Thank you.
@kitty42 (3923)
• United States
9 Oct 09
[b]Hello my friend No problem, I know so many people thet say they will change, eventually they go bak to the people they are because its hard to change who you are, either you have it or you don't, I feel sorry for so many people because they personality really sucks, its sad. Thanks for sharing.[/b]
• Philippines
23 Oct 09
Yeah right kitty42, they go back because they don't see the real essence of change. That truly sucks! Because they are not only deceiving their partners but themselves as well...
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
Well you got a point there. Habits are really different from personality. Personality is deeply rooted. Thanks for sharing kitty42!
@cherrc (661)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
correct, they show changes when u're around but going back to old habits when u dont see them. it's their own will. love is merely a motivation for the person to do the so called impossible things but in the end, it's really the person's decision in whether to change or not himself. ü
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Well I guess we should not get tired of motivating them to change their bad habits. The fact that they are trying to follow our advices means that they know that it is for the good of them. May be they are still in the stage of adjustment.
@cherrc (661)
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
well it's really hard to teach old dogs new tricks but it worth the try. we can never tell when people can adapt with the changes but if that's going to happen, then it will be so rewarding for us to be a part of it. ü
@irene3184 (898)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
I think you don't need to change for other person but change for better for the good of yourself. You must agree with it! Change comes from within and it makes you happy more if you change yourself for your own good not to the good of others.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
We must really do things for ourselves and not just to please others. If we just changed for a person's sake, if that person happens to be out of your life or something happen that made you not in good terms anymore, you will likewise go back to the original you because changes are made not because you really wanted it.
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
I agree with you that person change not for others but to be a better person to every person.
• Philippines
5 Nov 09
Yes, I do agree with with you at a certain point. On the other hand, please don't forget also those people who are "insanely" in love. These people can do anything even the impossible in the name of love. They will surely change their personality for the sake of the one they love.
• Philippines
5 Nov 09
Yes I believe so. But love subsides... so if the person changed for your sake only-- meaning, he doesn't realize the real and true value of that change... then he will come back to his original self when something happens.
@ybong007 (6643)
• Philippines
28 Oct 09
You can't change a person, you have to learn to accept a person. Our ideal person only exists in the mind. Cheers!
• Philippines
5 Nov 09
Ok let's drink to that santos_mlirs! Yes I both agree with you two, ybong007 and santos_mlirs. There is no such thing as perfect and ideal man. They exist only in our dreams. They are only real in TV and movies...
• Philippines
5 Nov 09
Yes, I agree with you. That's very true. There's no such thing as an ideal person. Nobody is perfect as the saying goes. Nobody is a perfect match for one person. You can never find that. I guess, you just have to live with that truth and accept that person for what he is. Cheers too!
@junior07 (972)
• India
8 Oct 09
Yes, you are right that's not possible even for love, but some people thought that it can, it might happen that one can't do in front of his/her loved one but as soon as he/she out from the eyes of his/her loved one, they again start behaving like they was. Every person after reaching the age of maturity, know about the good and bad, so noone can left his/her bad habits just for his/her love, until or unless they himself realize that.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Yes junior07, one cannot change if no admittance of mistake happens. If a person is not aware of his bad habits and attitude don't even think that he will change.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
No you should not change for the person you love or expect the person to change for you. If that person really love you he or she should accept you for who you are and what you are. Don't expect the person to change for somebody he is not because he will be a different person from the person you fell in-love with and you may want to change him back. Just be yourself and let the person be himself. Just be true!
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Hi again d_red_madelaine! You have double posting. My respond is the same as the above. Thanks!
• India
8 Oct 09
well if he truly loves you then surely he will change for you and i really agree with the three points you noted down there.. but he/her can also be changed by you if you show him and make him realise that he's going in wrong way...
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Well I think it is a matter of good communication. If we learn how to talk to our love ones in a good and not so pushy way, he will understand and be willing to change for the better.
• China
9 Oct 09
well . the answer is yes . because,I have changed so much for my girl . and it worth,
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
Hello there Panda608! How are you doing? It is really worth changing if you know that it is for your own good. And the bonus point to that was, you were able to make your girl proud of you. I know she feels that you valued her so much. She is truly a lucky girl. Just don't go back to the old you whatever happens. Enjoy mylotting!
• India
8 Oct 09
yes, we can change the person we love. without their will we can change the person's personality by giving them an strong example which can touch their heart.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Helping and supporting them to change will help a lot. It is really not enough to just say to them their flaws. We need to guide and show our love to them as well. We need to make them feel that we wanted them to change for their own good. Thank you for sharing vikygupta333.
• India
8 Oct 09
hi I think love is the most beautiful feeling in the world , a man can have. So If a person really like someone , he can really change his/her personality for his love one.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Some are really willing to change their personality in order to have a smooth sailing relationship. Well it is a good thing thou, if it is something for good.
@daodaozi (34)
• China
8 Oct 09
Hello.lovelyn I personly think that anything is possible.However ,it is only useful for some people,this will depend on the depth of the relationship. When fellings are strong ,there will be a clear effect of emotion.If feelings are not at a stage ,a people is indeed difficult to change.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Yes I agree with you, a person will change for you only if he is deeply inlove with you. When the feelings are strong enough to change ones' personality.
• India
8 Oct 09
In most the cases the person changes his personality for his loved one, thats till they have a fight. After that he will mostly become normal or will change to a completely different personality again. Its actually known as maturing.[:P]
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Sorry I got confuse. What is that normal and completely different personality? But yes I agree with your,maturity is a must have attitude for change. Welcome to mylot arcard1010!! Hope you enjoy your stay here! There is so many things to learn in here. Happy mylotting!!!
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
No you should not change for the person you love or expect the person to change for you. If that person really love you he or she should accept you for who you are and what you are. Don't expect the person to change for somebody he is not because he will be a different person from the person you fell in-love with and you may want to change him back. Just be yourself and let the person be himself.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
How would you let your love one continue what he is doing when you know exactly that what he doing is bad? Are you going to close your eyes and play blind all the time? Yes we love some of the things about him but I guess if you really love the person you will be honest enough to tell him the bad things that he is doing. You want him to change because you love and you care for him. But of course you are only limited to inspiring and motivating him. Change will really come from the person himself.
@mohitseth (568)
• India
8 Oct 09
yes my friend the word love is most powerful word in world. love makes you perfect when you are in love you care for the person you love and you are ready to sacrifice anything for her. i have changed a lot for my girl friend. she likes me now and i also loves to be loved by her. you should always change bad habbits in you and try to gain good habbits.
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
It is good that you don't take your girlfriend's advice in a negative way. I mean some man doesn't and hate to be controlled; they think if they followed their girlfriend they are being dictated already. They failed to realize the true reason behind the word change.
@jinggat (16)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
hello lovelyn! on my own view, a person can change his/her personality for a love one. it can be change gradually but not abruptly because that's what he/she used to do before. he/she can change an risk everything specially if she/he truely inloved just to be wtih the loved one. nothing is constant here on earth but changed..
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Change indeed needs time and lots of hard work. Willingness, sacrifice and determination are needed.
@lodz28 (86)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
we get hard to change ourselves how much more with our loveones.I believe only God can change us.we keep on promising that we change n yet we failed.we need to pray for a change in ourself first.so,we may become a blessing to others
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Change must start on us. Before we ask somebody to change his bad attitude we must be open for changes as well. Thank for sharing your views lodz28. Welcome to mylot!
@lodz28 (86)
• Philippines
8 Oct 09
Fortunately,we hardly change even ourselves much more with others.I believe God only can change us.we are always keep on promising that we have to change but yet we dont.we get easily comprimise with others.We need to pray for a change in our life,and we become blessing to others.
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
Yes I believe God can change the heart of a person, but it is not enough for us to just pray. We need to do our part as well. We should not rely everything on him. How and why He will help us if we are not even putting a little effort to change?
@Clheer71 (15)
• United States
8 Oct 09
I think people change because they have 1. have come to some realization that what they are doing is hurting another....pretty much only when they really do care about that person. 2. have something happen to them causing pain or disappointment, only to realize they do it themselves to others or maybe 3. (which I go with a lot) when you find someone you want to "better" for. Not just because they will leave you if you don't change, but because you know that down inside, changing whatever would really make them happy. but its a two way street, you can't be the only one changing in a relationship of any kind, both have to give and take a little but because you care, not because you were asked to.
• Philippines
9 Oct 09
Hmmpp.. Well that makes me think and wonder... Why do we need to wait for bad things to happen before we finally realize that what we are doing is wrong?