Young children swearing in the neighbourhood.

November 1, 2009 5:47am CST
In my road we have a lot of families with children and mostly my kids are friends with the other kids in the road. But my son made friends with the children of a particular family I am not keen on at all. The young girl who is only 8 keeps using swear words and not your average swear words either some of them are really bad. She also has her own mobile phone (as does her younger 6yr old brother) and she has put swearing songs on it. Everytime she comes out to play she is swearing at my kids, my youngest is 5. I find this disgusting, but their is no point speaking with her parents as she does this openly infront of her mother. Now my kids are banned from playing outside if she is out there. She keeps knocking around and asking them to play even though I have told her numourous times they won't play with her because she is using these words. Thankfully my children have all told me straight away and they don't want to play with her anymore because of her behaviour. This girl also has an older teenage sister that is quite nasty to the younger kids if they are playing outside. It is getting to the point where we can no longer let our kids outside to play because of this one family. We live in a nice area and mostly all the families are friends and the kids are all friends its just this one family that are ruining it for the rest of us. The parents do not care at all about their kids behaviour and basically let them run wild. Has anyone any suggestions on what we can do?
3 people like this
12 responses
• Malaysia
1 Nov 09
if it was me..i would like to talk to her parents..try to talk with other neighbor if their kids also experienced like yours? maybe with this you can have some proof and the other neighbor will back you up with their own experienced when their kids playing with this swearing kid...maybe with this this one parent can take care of their kids language with other people..its not nice seeing younger kids using swearing words that bad..
1 Nov 09
Talking to her parents isn't going to work as the girl can openly swear infront of them. I had an issue a while ago and had to talk to her parents because her older sister had thrown eggs at my next door neighbours house. She basically said so what, not her problem, she didn't care less. I mean her parents drive around with their youngest on their lap while they are driving, they let their kids stay up until all hours dispite having school the next day. These parents are dragging their kids up. Another neighbour had an issue with them, because the youngest had scratched their car (accidently) But when they spoke to them they were extremely rude. All they expected was an apology as it was an accident, instead it ended in a full blown arguement. So they are not going to be bothered over their child swearing
• Malaysia
1 Nov 09
if it happened like that, avoiding and ignoring them maybe the best way? gather some neighbor that have some issues and slow talk to them that we will not have direct contact with this one family for awhile.. maybe this make them aware about their attitude and eventually will talk about their kids behaviour?
@thea09 (18327)
• Greece
1 Nov 09
Hi skyeblue, that's exactly how it was getting where we used to live in England, some parents basically sent their children out to play from morning till late at night with pot noodles and crisps and the language was appaling. Naturally these children would be attending the same primary school and would be the same there, as if they don't learn respect within the home it is too late for them by the time they get to school age. My son was only 4 at the time but I didn't want him exposed to those kind of influences. So the solution, although rather drastic, I moved. Once these type of people move in unfortunately more tend to follow and the decent ones start to leave.
1 Nov 09
I hope that won't be the case as there is no way I can afford to move =( And I like the area. We live in a village and the kids school is fantastic. Its just this one family that are spoiling it for everyone. Luckily the kids in this family don't go to the same school as my kids. But I don't see why my kids should suffer and not be allowed to play outside because of this one family. Outside our house is a huge green where they can play football or other games. Behind our house is a huge orchard and woods that they can play in. I moved here because of the nice surroundings and the fact it was a 'safe' place for my kids to grow up, without the dangers of busy roads. I wish there was something we could do because when these kids are around my kids are stuck indoors =(
@thea09 (18327)
• Greece
1 Nov 09
Then the only thing I can suggest is that all the parents tell their children not to play with them and then when they ask why they might be prepared to listen and mend their ways, which they have obviously got from bad parents. The main thing is that they are in different schools.
@CRIVAS (1819)
• Canada
1 Nov 09
I think that it is horrible that parents let their children get away with this kind of thing. It isn't fair that you should have to keep your kids inside because of them, it's too bad that there isn't a bad parenting association that you can call to report these kinds of things. I would however like to recommend something, if things are really getting out of hand, I would call social services, I am sure that they would be very interested in the situation especially with the younger children in the household and it might even make the parents a little more cautious on how thier children behave. If not at least you know that you tried. I am glad to hear that your children know that it is not appropriate to speak in the same manner as the little girl. I too have had some issues with the launguage that the children in my area use, especially if my children are outside playing. I know that I have had to stop a group of teens walking past my house on their way home from school because of the laungage that they were using in front of my children., I told them that if they were going to be ignorant and use that kind of laungage I would appreciate it if they would find an alternate route home, I haven't seen them since but I am glad because now they aren't around to roll model for my children,LOL. Happy mylotting and I hope things work out for you and your children.
5 Nov 09
I have considered social services, especially when I saw the mum driving her car with her little boy who was 5yrs at the time on her lap. They are outside until late at night. But I don't think social services would do anything about it. They are fed and are not being physically or mentally abused. They are just being dragged up by bad parents. I think social services would think it was a waste of their time. If I saw really signs of severe child neglect then obviously I would, but that isn't the case.
@manong05 (5029)
• Philippines
1 Nov 09
As long as your your children are not influenced by them and it appears to me that they aren't so it is not really as serious as is seems. Obviously you have trained your children well and they themselves know that swearing is bad and not to be imitated. I will not ban them from playing just because there are children who are swearing outside. I will constantly remind them that they should not follow what others are doing. In the area where I live, we have a homeowners association where every member of the community can express his feelings on issues like this one and if there is a united voice of the majority, the parents of the swearing children may come to their senses and may do something about it. There is really nothing much we can do short of moving away which as you said is out of the question at the moment. If there are people who should move, it must be them because their behaviour is not welcome in the village. Like the old saying that says... "evil flourish because the good men are not doing anything about it."
1 Nov 09
Thankyou. Maybe you are right, I mean the children that are swearing are making themselves isolated from everyone because of their behaviour. My kids still go round to their friends houses and play so they haven't been banned from playing just been stopped from being around the children that are swearing. Your right in saying it is not that serious at the moment, but if this child grows up learning no respect for those around her what will it be like as she gets older?
@syankee525 (6294)
• United States
1 Nov 09
my thing is you tell her there will be no swearing in front of your kids or she will not be allow to play with your kids, and go and talk to her parnets about this, and if they refuse to do anything about it then you just stop allowing her around your kids, i dont care who kids comes to my house, its my house and my rules. inside or outside in my yard. stand firm to them.
1 Nov 09
Currently she is banned from playing with my kids or going near them. But actually you may have a point. If I open my garden to her and make a firm point no swearing in my home or garden, then I am giving her a chance to redeem herself. Until recently she was a good kid and played well with my kids, but her language has put a stop to it. It is worth a go I guess she is just a kid and if she can have some good influences from somewhere then its good for her. But if it happens again I will be back to square one.
@maximax8 (28875)
• United Kingdom
1 Nov 09
I have heard it described as strong language but it really is weak language. I wouldn't wish my children to spend time around those those that swear. I know that some people where one of my friends lives there are some children in her neighborhood that swear. Your children sound sensible and should ignore such awful words. You could mention to the other children's parents that their kids have been using poor language. I am a primary school teacher and that sort of language is against the school rules. Good luck.
1 Nov 09
The other families in the road are aware and they don't like it either so they keep their kids indoors too. I guess my kids will just have to have the kids that are well brought up and polite around ours more and they will go around their homes more. Absolutley no point in telling the parents of the kids that swear because they do it right infront of them. Thank goodness my kids are sensible and they don't like the behaviour. They would rather be indoors than listen to the words. But then I don't swear and neither does my husband. There is no need for it. It just worries me as the words this 8yr old is coming out with she shouldn't have heard at all. They are not just your basic words. She was a sweet kid until this summer. It has probably got to do with her teenage sister, as she isn't the nicest of people and the fact her parents do not control it. I find it really sad for her and her younger brother and angry that her parents allow it to happen
• China
2 Nov 09
The bebays have the common character when they young, the circumstance is very important for them, so we must give them a good envionment. we have to give more attention to them and give the correct induction.
@bird123 (10526)
• United States
2 Nov 09
I would not make assumptions that talking with their parents won't help. Go with warmth and kindness.Bring them a home cooked pie. Ask for their help. Explain what it does to other children. Sometimes people can surprise you.
@Hatley (164450)
• Garden Grove, California
2 Nov 09
hi skyeblue Do the parents of the swearing kid live in a rental or own their own home? if it is a rental you might be able to complain to the owner or manager of the rental, and maybe get them evicted as they are causing a lot of problems for all the other families. Otherwise I would definitely go to the parents and tell them that you do not like that girl swearing like that in front of your children, and you do not appreciate the older sister being mean to the younger kids. someone has got to make these horrible people understand that they cannot talk like that.
• United States
2 Nov 09
well it doesnt really matter if your kids know swear words because they will learn them anyways and they will eventually mature
• Nigeria
1 Nov 09
Not that I disagree with your concern, but I don't understand what is so wrong with swearing to me it is just a way to express yourself and it isnt so bad as long as you don't insult anyone. Would you mind explain what the problem with swearing is?
@solared (1210)
• United States
1 Nov 09
When I was a kid if I did that I had a bar of soap in my mouth...lol Anyways yeah it's alarming look at the youtube videos of kids swearing, or look at the one on funnyordie with Will Ferrell and that kid who is swearing at him and supposed to be his landlord.