do you ever feel jealous to a friend?

@ckyera (17261)
Philippines
November 3, 2009 11:36pm CST
hehe...do you? i have come to this topic coz i remember when i was still in on my teen age years, i have this close friend that i am always with. we are very close that every weekend i am in their house & we are always together in most activities... since we are that close, we are also close to our parents, i mean me to his mom & she to my mom... but, in the long run, i feel something strange, hehe i feel jealous on her coz she & my mom becomes very close! haha closer than we are... and she calls my mom 'mommy' something like that and my mom always talk about her...and whenever we are together, i feel like they are already have this mother-daughter relationship more than me to my mom! huh! but anyway, that happens long time ago & everything is fine now, we are still friends and she's still close to my mom, same with me to her mom... how about you? do you ever feel this way to your friend? hehe like you feel jealous on them, in some way? how was it? good day!
5 people like this
30 responses
@shibham (17025)
• India
4 Nov 09
hi ckyera, kumutsa ka? honestly, yes sometimes but i have not faced a similar situation as u to become envy for a friend. perhaps you have misjudged the entire situation. no mother can love other child as much as they do to their own. in my case, i was envy to one of friend in university life. he was too much handsome and all the girls stood in a q after him. it irritates me bcoz he was not so much intelligent( he is also a college lecturer and still a good friend of me). he often begged my notes to attend in a exam even he sat in front of me in examination hall and copied all everything whatever i write. but he got the job before than me. it also made me jealous. but after one year i also got the sa,me job similar to him. hahaha..........
2 people like this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hi shibham! im fine! and i'm surprised that you use my language! well, well, you are right, maybe i just mis interpret it that time, but well im still young then and the situation is new to me... with you, haha that's funny, but good that you also get the same job that he has and the job that you like.. so how was he now? do you still feel jealous towards him?
2 people like this
@shibham (17025)
• India
4 Nov 09
hi ckyera. yes, now we are good friend as before and i have nothing to be jealous again.thanks.
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
okay, thanks also yaar!
1 person likes this
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
4 Nov 09
hehehe ^_^ SIlly gal!! What's there to be jealous about in the first place when u are your mom's flesh and blood!! hehe ^_^ BUt it's normal for u to feel that way, for u are still young at that time.. And u might feel neglected by her, when u do not get her attention as much as before.. hehe I do feel such jealousy towards my frenz as well, because it's like we are sharing a very close friendship, and yet someone tries to cut it in, back stabb etc, even though nothing happens in the end.. haha =D Actually what we are jealous about, is the process, and the things we see.. But when we dun see or hear, everything is fine.. lol =D
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
haha...or maybe because i'm just like that! hehe well of course i feel a bit jealous coz they are so sweet together while me? hmp! i don't know, i just feel that mom treats her differently from me...and i don't see her treating my other friends that way... and also, because i always receive some scolds from her when i do something wrong...haha
1 person likes this
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
5 Nov 09
Well, no matter what, she scold u, is for your own good.. hehe ^_^ Would u rather she dun scold u, and allow u to be doing all the wrong things?? haha As she's your fren, thus your mom has to entertain her, and reason as to why they are close, might be that she respects your mom, and can get along well with her, with lotsa topics to chat about.. hehe ^_^ I believe your mom will treat me like her son too! lol =D
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
haha..yes i know, that parents do that for their children...and they say that when your parents scolded you hen you do something wrong, it only means that they love you truly! well, well, yes she respects my mom and i think its also because my friend is the one who acts sweetly to my mom and so my mom feels good about it...hehe coz im not as sweet as her that time... maybe, if you only act good on her, most probably she will treat you that way...hehe
@simonelee (2718)
• China
4 Nov 09
Hello, gain. Nu-huh! my friends are close to my family and I'm fine with it. Same as you they call my mom "mama". I never get jealous to their closeness even if my girl friends hug and kiss my mom like mother and daughter's affection. I only get jealous when i see my mom or a man eyeing her or showing interest at her!
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hehe, well, maybe i feel that way before, because she's the first one who really becomes that close to my mom...as in super close, i feel that they are evn closer than we are! hehe my other friends are also close to my mom but i don't feel that way...huh! hehe, i don't feel jealous on that, i feel mad! haha
@simonelee (2718)
• China
4 Nov 09
Oh, i used the wrong word. well, yes. i get mad like a bull when i saw them exchanging smile or what ever it is that shows interest and I hate it! They are old to do that!!! I'm cool when it comes to that but I don't want my mom or any man show interest at her. Hand off to my mom.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
haha... well i understand you coz you are just trying to protect your mom! hehe but know what? my mom even told me stories about her love life before! haha and sometimes when we are together and we come across with one of her past bf or what, she even point it to me & started to tell stories! haha i feel like ...geez! haha but sometimes i enjoy it...what i just don't like is when the guy flirts...haha i get mad and afraid that my father will know, haha
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
4 Nov 09
I've never been jealous, but I have friends whom are quite envious of me. That's because the body language and actions pretty much were it. And one friend told me that the other was talking bad about me. Well, all those small stuffs, but it seemed like the biggest problem ever at that time. All yester-years. And most of the guys were like trying to show they were cool, when they knew quite a lot and were pretty much back-stabbing one another. I used to think that the fist is the solution for everything, but as I mature, it feels that to be cool, calm and collected are better.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hi zed1 well that's good that you never feel jealous...seems like you do have such self confidence... maybe your friends are just insecure with you... and oh, im surprise to know that even between guy friends , such things also exists? thought those were just a girl thing... haha, maybe you let him feel your fist on his face! haha just kidding! being calm & cool and have self control is always the best to stay away from troubles in moment like this...
1 person likes this
@zed_k4 (17627)
• Singapore
5 Nov 09
Nah ... jealousy is just everywhere and it exists for both men and women. Perhaps ladies express it more than guys. Guys are jealous but they are not so direct. But the talking behind the back are all the same; just that sometimes guys put it in a subtle way, if you get what I mean.. . Not like a gossip monger type though, LOL. But there are ladies whom are not like that and men whom are not too. These are those happen to have jealous sides to them only.. generally speaking..
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
haha..yes, men are not as expressive as women in terms of feelings...coz as far as they can, they will just keep it to themselves...which sometimes result to worst...huh! my husband is like that, he don't show that he feels jealous, and i feel that he never do...but when he reach his limit, he just explode and tell everything to me...haha, same with my father.
1 person likes this
@voldrox (7204)
• India
4 Nov 09
hi cykera well that is funny, i am sure now you don't have such silly issues hehe... anyways hmm talking about jealousy i have a very close friend of mine, she is such a nice girl and i don't know why sometimes i makes me really jealous when she admires some other guy!... gosh i dunno what has been happening to me lately ...
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
huh! maybe you are in love with her! well, i think most of us will tend to be jealous when our special someone or someone close to us becomes close to other people...hehe coz it means that attention we get will become lesser...and just maybe. well, now, yes no more silly issues about it! and anyway, my friend & my mom didn't know that i feel that way that time...
1 person likes this
@voldrox (7204)
• India
4 Nov 09
..i dunno ckyera it could be, anyways all i know is that we are very good friends and certainly wish to stay that way for long, umm .... hehe i think i need to concentrate on my studies more for now HAHAHA... something to keep me busy with so i that i don't think much about her ... well talking about attention yeah i crave for hers hehehe... okay okay hehe enough of thinking about her ... have a nice day ckyera:)
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
haha...that's right, you should concentrate on your studies first...hehe but you can always make her as your inspiration! huh! well, just stay nice to her and i hope that your friendship with her last for long and ahem...have you ever think of her as more than friends?
1 person likes this
@chaitra001 (3278)
• Bangalore, India
4 Nov 09
Hi ckyera.. I never got jealous on my friends.. one of my best friend is very close with my parents and my sister.. I am also very close with her parents.. whenever she comes to my home my parents treat her like how they treat us.. in her house also I am treated as a family member.. we never get jealous on each other.. we help each other when needed.. though we both are married we both go for shopping very often when my husband and her husband are busy to go out for shopping..
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
helo chaitra! wow! that's nice to hear...that till now you are still close to your friend was still able to go out together even if you both are already married... you really are best friends in its sense! well, with me, its just a bit jealousy...hehe and it don't ruin our relationship, i am also close to her mom and her mom also treats me nicely. just maybe i saw something with her & my mom that i didn't see with me & my mom! huh! but anyway, still my mom is my bestfriend and we are really close as friends, and my friend, she's still my friend but we don't see each other much now coz we are living from different province already, but i visit her everytime i go home... thanks for sharing!
• Bangalore, India
4 Nov 09
me and my friend try to meet atleast once in a week.. and we speak on phone three to four times in a week.. sometimes every day..
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
wow! that's great!
@Cheiyen (317)
• Philippines
14 Jan 10
yes, when i was in high school because i felt that i was better than her and i was just around 15. it was award-related thingy but i talked to her and said sorry. it was just like an initial reaction. if i were in your shoes, i would get jealous for a while. then i'll be happy and proud of my mom because she's great at building relationships. if i'm assured of her love, i won't be jealous of my friend even they have some sorta mom-daughter relationship. i'm the biological daughter and we (my mom and i) know each other really well. have a lovely day!
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
14 Jan 10
hello there! yes i understand you with what you have experienced and i guess most of us do experience having such feelings specially when we are on our teenage years... yeah, i feel proud of my mom coz she's really good in building relationships even to my friends... actually she's in good terms with all of my friends...what just makes me jealous with this particular friend of mine is that i feel that her treatment to my friend is different from how she treats my other friends...haha but i do understand them in the process coz i also kno how sweet that friend of mine was... thanks for sharing !
• India
4 Nov 09
k,this is a cool questio.but 1 thing i dindt understad dat y we need 2 jealous with friends,any way they r our friends and dr will b no secrets in between us.but as a coin having 2 sides,some times it may happen.!!!! :-)
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hehe...hi ifthiker! you already answer you own question..hehe but i guess its human nature... thanks & welcome to mylot...
@udnisak (610)
• Australia
4 Nov 09
every human being feels jealousy.. we can not stop that..i think when we try to think toooo logically we get that feeling...lol.. i really dont know the sceientific explaination.. however most important thing is we need to think intelligently and have to react intelligently..if we react accrding to the J feeling we will do something which wont be acceptable and fogivable.. so beware..
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
oh yeah, i get it and i think you are right. well those are things of the past and nothing serious happens after that. i never told to my mom & to my friend that i have such feeling that time...i try to act normally as if nothing when im with them and i fight that bad feeling...so in the end, we stay friends and my mom & i are also stay close and becomes closer as i aged... thanks udnisak , have a great day & welcome to mylot...
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
Nah, I never get jealous to friend nor envy them. I only get jealous to my girlfriend if she starts flirting with some random guy, hah, but that's another story. Well, my philosophy about friendship is that they're like your brothers or sisters, always have an equal share, equal love, and most of all, TRUST. :)
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hello ripnstock! yes jealousy towards a gf/bf is another story... well i also believe that and agree... but i am still young then and i don't know, that's why i said its a strange feeling and even weird...even i myself don't understand why i feel that way that time...but maybe because its due to some situations that's happening then... thanks for sharing & welcome to mylot!
@jayzelle (76)
4 Nov 09
when I was in my teen age years i used to be jealous on my friends because my parents are very strict and they don't want me to go out with my friends and to have fun. that's the reason why i am jealous to my friends because they have parents that have trust on them. They could go wherever they wanted to go and do whatever they wanted to do and because they enjoy there teen age years not like me my life is only focus on school and at home and it so boring.hehe
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hehe...well i guess, you are like one of my friend in high school, they get jealous or they envy me coz they say that my parents are nice giving me freedom, while their parents are kinda strict...hehe but i know your parents just want the best for you that's why they do that...
• Australia
4 Nov 09
When I was young - and that was a very long time ago - I was somewhat jealous of anyone who had a happy family. I had been abused in all ways for the first 22 years of my life and had never known the love of a family. I had a friend who I thought belonged to a perfect family. I don't suppose you could call it jealousy, but I really wished I had been part of a family like hers, where everyone cared for one another.
1 person likes this
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
4 Nov 09
hello cloudwatcher... sorry to hear that you have ben abused for that long in your life... i hope that you are okay now. well, i guess if we are experiencing such things, its just normal that we will tend to dream of having a life better than the one we have...i guess what you feel then is not jealousy, but you are just dreaming to have a nice family as hers... i understand you, coz i once feel that too...that i envy the life of some of my friends when my family is going through many problems & trials in life...
• India
5 Nov 09
Hi Cyera Yes i do have a friend like you have...so close. But i never felt jealous about any things...it dint even come to my mind.... Are You or were you jealous ? If yes, then i would like to know for what....? I dont see anything jealousy here... Take Care
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
5 Nov 09
hello sonuherenz! well, its good for you that you don't feel any jealousy...hehe me? yes i feel jealous that time coz my friend & my mom are very close...or even closer than me & my mom! haha they are so sweet that make them looks like a real mom & daughter...huh! and i am new to that situation coz she's the only friend of mine that becomes that close to my mom... but that was before, everything si resolved now and i don't feel jealous at all... but there are times, that i still feel some jealousy towards my friends, i don't know but i always have such feelings at times...maybe im kinda possessive...huh! and i hate it when i feel that way, specially when i don't have a reason & the right to feel jealous... by the way, are you the brother of shames?
1 person likes this
• India
6 Nov 09
:) Ha Ha...I think mostly jealousy term works for females than males...I think haan..i may be wrong..dont get angry... :) yes, we are real brothers....I am older and he is younger...How you guessed it...? Take Care
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
haha...i will not feel angry coz its true! but, i think men also feels jealous, just that they are not showing it the way female do... coz i remeber shames telling me about his brother being also here...and i come to cross in one discussion that i think you said that you are brothers or its shames who says it...hehe not sure... so you are just 2 in your family? or you also have other brothers & sisters?
1 person likes this
• Philippines
2 Apr 10
Hi, there was a time when I got jealous but not long. My best is also close to my family..there came a time that they almost compare the two of us..worst they wish she was their daughter. Well, I can't blame them because she is really nice and good-hearted person. Until now, we are still best of friends.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
2 Apr 10
hello workingmoms, yeah i think when we are being compared to our closest frien sometimes it gives us some bad feelings specially when things are always in favor of them.... but its a good thing that such feelings didn't ruin your friendship with her...just like me & my friend that till now we are still friends and everything was just part of our experiences... hmmm, may i know? is your friend aware that you feel jealous towards her?
@Bhadine (144)
• Philippines
29 Mar 10
Just like you, I also experienced being jealous to a friend. She was my college best friend. We were always together, and I most often I was in their house. She got all the things I wanted in life;like a happy family, a cool parents, beauty and most of all talents. She has a very good voice and she's a dancer as well. As a friend, I was always on her side during her competitions. Whenever she won, I was happy for her but I felt envy as well. I always pitied myself whenever we're together. However, that was before. Those days are over. I finally know where I truly belong now.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
1 Apr 10
hello bhadine, well i guess at one point of our life, all of us do feel that way towards our friends or even just to other people whom we think have the things that we want to have...just like what you have said... but anyway, its a good thing that now, you finally realize and know where you belong... sometimes we just tend to not notice what we have coz we are busy looking at others...sometimes we fail to know that we even have something greater than theirs, or we have something that they wanted to have as well...huh! life life life! anyway thanks for sharing and have a good day!
@cobradene (1171)
• India
24 Dec 09
I have never been in this situation so, I can't tell. Rather, I would say, my friend started feeling jealous on me when I visited his home and stayed for a couple of days, and his mother was very hospitable. He just couldn't handle the attention I got, and the response... Somehow, he was nice to me before she came, and she wasn't there a couple of days. But soon after she was back in town, she scolded him for not being responsible enough to feed me etc... He didn't like it... And also, he just wanted to see to it that I leave as soon as possible, and he wouldn't be home at all most of times after his mom came. I guess he just doesn't like being around her, and I understood that it's time for me to leave and I had to leave in one of the most odd situations. I was surprised, at one side he showed great friendship, and on the other side, this split character... After that, I vowed never to visit his place again. We just keep in touch through mails some times.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
27 Dec 09
hello cobradene... oh that was sad, but i do understand your friend as well, maybe he just feel upset with the scolding he gets from his mom while his mom is treating you well, maybe he wants to get the same treatment as his mom treats you... with me & my friend, well, we didn't come to that extent coz whenever she's in our house, i also treated her well, afterall she's my friend & our visitor in the house and besides, she also treated me well when i am in their house as well as her mom... well atleast you still have communication with your friend, maybe you could try again to visit him in his homje...who knows, he have changed already and becomes more mature... thanks!
@Sir_bobby88 (8244)
• Singapore
2 Dec 09
Yes sometimes i will but i always believe the world is unfair , so i gonna work hard to get what i want .
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
2 Dec 09
i guess that's the better thing to do...work harder to get what we want instead of feeling jealous to others... thanks sir bobby...
@ladym33 (11008)
• United States
2 Dec 09
No, I was always the one that friends would be jealous of and it used to hurt my feelings tremendously. I once had someone who I thought was my best friend tell me she hated me because her mom liked me so much and because boys liked me and all this stuff. Literally told me she hated me. I never did anything other than be nice and I couldn't help it if boys liked me. She ended up being so spiteful and jealous that she even started a vicious rumor about me at school and got a lot of people mad at me. I didn't deserve any of that. I would never treat someone like she treated me just because they were nice or pretty.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
2 Dec 09
hello ladym! well i guess that's too much jealousy on the part of your friend! huh! that's not healthy and it will ruin the friendship... too bad that she even makes some rumors about you... didn't you talk to her about it? or you just move away from her? oh my, thanks that my jealousy that time didn't come to that extent like of your friend... thanks for sharing...
@meapas (2434)
• India
8 Nov 09
Actually I don't feel jealous but it gives me lot of happiness when someone from outside bonds with your family member like glue specially if they are of very caring, understanding and loving nature. This has happened with me many many times.
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
8 Nov 09
hello meapas! well that's good for you! coz the feeling of jealousy is really bad...huh! i wish i can be like you in this term... but, i am also happy when other people specially my friends become close to my family and bond with us as their real family also...its just that, that time, i am still young and having some issues! thanks friend for sharing!
@mobhomeir (7565)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
Hello once again ckyra it's been a long time since my last comment on your topics. Speaking of jealousy parent-friends relationship was never happen to me even before maybe because I am a man and of course my friends are always boys and it's seldom a friend-boy would have a closeness with my mother..most likely friend-girl to my mother but it never did to me...I have a lots of friends (boys) but I don't remember anyone of my friends had a close mother-friend close relationship...Well maybe you're just insecure he he he he heh e eh ehe he maybe because you were putting some malice on what maybe you observed between your mom and your best friend...Cheers!
@ckyera (17261)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
hahaha...hello daddy! how are you? i miss you! well, well...you're right, its different situation when it comes to boys...coz just like with my brother, he has lots of friends going to our house and somehow nice to my mom but of course its different as compared to my friends... maybe you are right, i am a bit insecure that time! haha and have some issues...you know. and just like what i am saying to others, i am new in the situation and i just didn't expect that they will be that close! thanks daddy and nice to see you back!