Does love still exist?

Philippines
November 5, 2009 10:58pm CST
Years of hurdling life's ups and downs together, you still manage to be living in the same roof with that same man/woman. However,things had changed, no more cuddling, kissing, hugging, dating not even the interest to talk to each other or doing things together like eating, shopping, watching t.v. and going to bed at the same time.You'd rather browse the internet until the wee hour than talking to your partner, no more goodnights before dozing off or I love you's.You don't even look at at each other anymore. Is there still love between you and your partner?
1 person likes this
11 responses
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
I think the things you mention are all tell tale signs and only a stupid person who have no intelligent could assure itself that it would not matter but it does matter at all. Those things being done to you by your partner means he is losing interest on you and their is no need to pretend with false hope and assurance becoming a martyr in the process it would not going to benefit either of the two of you.I think it is better to talk it over and explain what have you observe as you may find the deeper reasons or else everything become false hope..
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Again, the key word is "talking" of which the couple doesn't engage themselves with anymore... Thanks, Neelianoscet.:-)
• Philippines
8 Nov 09
yeah, that is the power of communication and every one should learn to be open to discussing relevant matter including the up and down factors in every relationship.
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
it's sad to know that some couples do end up like that, as if the other partner doesnt exist? life is suppose to be a journey for couples who are together. be it for happy times or bad times. but let's face it, that love we have needs to be rekindled and nurtured. going out of the usual territory, having a vacation or just going on a dinner date and enjoying the moment alone with each other sure helps. holding hands, giving sweet nothings for no reason helps keep the sweetness stay. sometimes we are so focused with our day to day needs that we tend to forget one another. i don't go to sleep without a kiss and saying i love you and i still sleep in his arms. i still ask him to buy something for me on his payday and he knows im happy for it. i too do my share. we still love each other despite the hassles and worries. spend quality time with each other, and you'll know there are so many things that you both could talk and listen.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
You are lucky to sustain such lopve with your partner, etheljane.:-) Best wishes to both of you.:-)
@dpk262006 (53850)
• Delhi, India
6 Nov 09
Hi eureka! Welcome to mylot family. There appears some truth in your statement. If the situation is just like as you have described, then we needs to think seriously about a relationship. If a couple has reached such an impasse and both or either of them start browsing internet or separately watch TV, you may say that the love factor has gone missing in their relationship. One needs to pay attention to his/her partner and togetherness will bring back the bonding and love, I believe.
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
Hello.:-) Very well said...I absolutely agree with you that love had somehow bade them goodbye, but, funny, the husband is insisting he still loves her wife.:-)
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (53850)
• Delhi, India
6 Nov 09
If the wife feel otherwise (she think that hubby does not love her) she has every right and reasons to think so. BTW, are the affected party or someone else?
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
lol. which one, the one who ignores the one who is being ignored?:-)
@anneshirley (1517)
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
I really can't say....first, one must know the answer why things have turned bad between the two of them. If they will be able to know the reason why, then they can easily address the problem. For example, if it is because of lack of time for each other, then they have to spend more time together. I believe that love won't be lost easily. There are many elements that are needed to make relationships work but the key ingredient is the time together. If two people spend time together, surely they will be able to talk about problems and issues and will be able to address it right away before matter goes out of hand.
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
this a very wise advice. codos
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Anneshirley, you have hit the spot. But it is only possible if both of the partners admit that they have done something wrong thus, hurt each other... Without humility and owning up to own mistake, it is not going to work... Thank you, though.:-)
• Philippines
8 Nov 09
If they really do love each other, then they won't care about their pride because they are together as one.
@kush20006 (515)
• India
6 Nov 09
eureka tell me even if the love life has lost but still there exist a thing that is the history sheet of their relation how they come together they would have liked each other sometime in their life so they got married so it is pointless to say that love has lost even in the dayz when one not talks or not give gud nyts or kisses one still cares the thing is that the partners have become too much confident aout each other and know that this person will not leave me whatever i do i mean they have got a security that they would never be separated so they leave greeting each other
• Philippines
6 Nov 09
of course, Kush. Sometimes in their lives they both believe they love each other. But along the way something might have come between them. Like, one of them betrayed the other. If they are just comfortable and too secure with their relationship,I just can't comprehend it.:-)
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Hello, Paintswithwords. :-) Thank you for the comment. You said loving and harmonious relationship. Everything that I have described in my post happened when the husband started lying and betraying her wife. He even put her in the bad light just to gain favors from the women he was flirting with... I don't think this is a loving and harmonious relationship.... I wish I can agree with you on this...
• India
7 Nov 09
whatever you say girl the thing is that when you think its not right it cant be and when you beleive and you make it feel right it automatically becomes right
@simonelee (2721)
• China
7 Nov 09
hi, eurekafemme. I guess there's still little love around them because they still together despite of the miserable life they have. I think in a situation like this one of them should exert effort to talk about their issues and problems. I guess the two parties are only waiting to resolve the dying relationship.
• Philippines
8 Nov 09
One of them, has tried and exerted all efforts to talk he matters over but... She got sick and tired talking to him anymore... thank you, Simonelee.:-)
@simonelee (2721)
• China
8 Nov 09
oh! maybe they're waiting who's gonna leave the house? conscience? or maybe they're waiting who's gonna own the house. this may involve money. I don't know... whatever their reasons are I hope they separate in a good way.
@Hatley (157768)
• Garden Grove, California
7 Nov 09
eurekafemme oh my that sounds so sad and so awful. that did not happen to me and my husband.We cuddled, and hugged, and went out to eat with our two children.we laughed and played, quarreled and madeup. we lost a child, we had a period when my hubby was out of work, we had ups and downs but we stuck it out because we cared for each other. We always talked,we always ate together. we did not have internet then but television. with all of what you named I would doubt that their was any love left. best to part and start over then.
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Hatley, Indeed it is a sad fact... I'm happy for you, though.:-)
@bird123 (10346)
• United States
7 Nov 09
In a RUT??? That is a sure sign that change is needed. Sometimes to change someone else, we must change ourselves. Any good relationship takes work. So often what we get out of life is what we put into it. So do something special or do the unexpected. Gaze deeply into those eyes. You will remember why the love will always be there. Celebrate!!
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Gaze into his eyes?How? Can't even stand to look at his face.LOL
@elrener (112)
• Sweden
6 Nov 09
Hmm...love is such a deep emotion. I mean maybe it may seem like your partner doesn't care or his just ignoring you but i still think deep inside the partner still cares.
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Out of the abundance of your heart, your mouth speaks.but in this case, you speak thru deeds...and you prefer to ignore your partner than show you care? you are one optimistic person. Thanks.:-)
@CRIVAS (1822)
• Canada
6 Nov 09
Wow, it sounds as if this relationship is either in need of counsling, or a break up. I say this because I married my high school sweet heart. My husband and I have been together for over 12 years, and married for 5 of those years. I know that even though we have been together for so long, we still love each other, in fact we love each other more today than when we first started going out. We still wake up next to eachother every morning, we watch movies together every night, we eat together and we spend every possible moment together. We have two children and still manage to make time for ourselves so that the romance aspect of our relationship keeps us happy. We are still learning new things about eachother and we still make eachother laugh. I think that if a relationship is the same as the one that you are discribing, it is time for a change. I think that if you are no longer in love, it is time to call it quits. There is no reason to suffer in a relationship with someone you don't love just because you used to love eachother at one point. If you are both unhappy, it could be that you are in different places in your lives and that you aren't good for each other any more. I hate to say it but it sounds more like a relationship of convnience than anything else and in my experience, this can make you resentful of eachother. Now I have to ask: Have you talked to your partner about how you are feeling? If you have I hate to say it but you need to cut your loses. If not, then you really should talk to your parnter and let him know how you are feeling. Hope that helps.
• Philippines
7 Nov 09
Good day, Crivas. Thanks for the sound advise.:-) This relationship needs change, indeed...
• United States
7 Nov 09
My Wife and I - Praise the Lord for he has made us glad and has saved us and filled us with everlasting peace and love and we will be forever more till death do us apart.
Well if your question is to be asked honestly.... There is no love in lust. Same gender partners know not love. That is lust! God is the giver of love and is love and anyone who has love has been touched by God. Once you dive over to that side you have lost your connection with God and with love. Second what is the foundation of your marriage? If it is the feeling you get when being around that person and the twittepated giddyness and even a care for that person than that would be a good explanation why your marriage has ended up that way. If your not married and your sleeping together that scientifically (as God as decreed in his word) is a violation against the individual and a process happens to the relationship to decay the happyness. Sin is the underlying leech of love and takes all love from the individual. Love must be obtained before one can remain in love one must have it in their heart for one. There needs to be an understanding and a limitless connection between the two and the deepest commitment to where no one else can be in between that relationship. For as God has said in his word they shall leave their father and mother and become one flesh. So the foundation must be upon this as the understanding that you two are of one flesh no longer independent and as the bible says the husband has not power over his body but the wife and the wife has not power over her body but the husband. So you must no longer be as two seperate but as one. Fireproof the movie is an excellent view on how a marriage can crumble and detieriorate and fall apart and yet there is hope and there is love still to be had. So the answer is yes. The issue though is God. A relationship void of God is void of understanding and is void of true undefiled love. A relationship where the indiviuals therein have blatently ignored the love of the creator and the guidance of the everlasting is a relationship destined for pain and misery because they are without the strength and love of God without the divine councel and without divine purpose so it is a rather vain endeavor. The answer to put it simply is Yes there is hope but only with the grace of God who sheds love abroad in the hearts of those converted souls because true love comes from the heart the soul and the spirit. It is also an effort that would have to be willing to take. The one with the strength inside to endure all afflictions and to overlook all mistakes all sins and all trespasses is the one to strive on with inner peace and this is the one with the strength of God. I tell you I have only been married for a year but I have been with my wife for almost 3 years and without God there is no recovery for the sins of the past without the forgiveness upon one's conscience there can be no inner peace to live for the other and no strength to strive on in joyful bounty. God has forgiven all my sins has delivered me from my sin and I do not hurt my wife the way I used to and I am a completely new man. I was darkened by sin and blinded to the damage I was doing and now I have been awakened and set free and though we have our struggles and we have bouts of sin wherein we have fallen from grace our Lord Jesus Christ is there to forgive us and cleanse us of our sins. He is their for all of you in your relationships as well and that is where you are going to find hope to cure any bad relationship. (besides those which are abominable as such are same gender partnerships those are relationships of a nature where true love will NEVER be felt!)