Is it possible that you have a partner but in love with someone else?

Philippines
November 11, 2009 10:45pm CST
Most cases of break up and divorse is due to third party. I wonder why, is it because you don't love your partner enough or you are just fooled by some ciscumstances. So is it possible that you are in a relationship but you are in love with somebody else?.. Kinda weird!
8 responses
@shell2784 (752)
• United States
12 Nov 09
I agree that yes, most of the time break ups and/or divorces are due to a 3rd party... but its because one of the two in the relationship has their own issues that need working out - but its easier to turn to something new then it is to try and fix something existing. I know I dated a guy for 2 1/2 years - and we were arguing about stupid little things... and him and I just... had our issues. Some of them since the get go and some forming as the relationship went on. We'd break up, and honstly, it was always him calling me crying or stopping over crying or whatever, begging to take him back. Towards the end I believe I called it off twice within a month, both times he talked me back into it. I loved him dearly, but no longer wanted to be refered to as his girlfriend kind of thing. We weren't in the same mindset with what we wanted out of life at the moment an it just wasn't working. Then of course I met a new guy at work... and we really hit it off. I ended up cheating on him. And honestly, at first, I didn't feel too badly about it... until he found out. Because of someone else... whether you touched them or not, is NOT the reason to end any relationshp. Sometimes the grass looks greener on the other side, but when you get there.. you find out it was just an illusion. Its definitly possible to be dating someone and find yourself in love with someone else... but 9 chances out of 10... its a fake love. Its because they'll listen to you with fresh ears *unlike your mate* and they'll seem like prince (or princess) charming in disguise. I say don't go there. If you feel the need to leave your lvoed one for someone else... sit down and really think about WHY this new person is so attractive to you. It will mostly likely make you realize what is wrong in your current relationship, and hopefully inspire you to work at it.
• India
13 Nov 09
How well said shell.. I won't post a separate response cause I wanna say exactly what you said. Whenever there's new love (as you said prince/princess) there is always an inborn feeling to impress the other one and thats why it feels all lovely and all. If we have problems in our love life, its really much better to sit and talk with our partner than to just go out with someone else...
16 Nov 09
Well, most relationships end up because of infidelity..but i guess it would not happened if only you are contented with your partner..as long as you would never put a hint that you like that 'third party', feelings may fade away..trusting is a very precious act..
@eLsMarie (4148)
• Philippines
14 Nov 09
there are people who often find reasons on why should they love their partners that's why when they found out that their partner tend to not maintain the things that made his/her other half special that's the time when they prefer breaking up. i think people has their own self satisfaction and a lot has problems dealing with it.
• Malaysia
12 Nov 09
to me, it is impossible. in my understanding, when u are fall in love, you only able to focus on your partner, even there are more handsome or beautiful girl around your life but your eyes only able to fill with your partner. it is love. you cant get any space for others in your heart.heart only got one, how to separate the heart to different people and also betray the one u love. it sounds hurt and it really indeed. so if you are really love your partner, it will not happen unless you are not love him/her anymore. even like that, you also should clear the relationship before you start the next relationship. dun find excuse to have affair, no matter what is the excuse will just only hurt the one who love you so much. i agree with you. a truly love should not like tat. be rational, and clear every relationship, don mix all at the same time, it is just hurt!! support you^^ keep the thinking all the ways~
• India
12 Nov 09
If after marrying and having children if you find the one whom was your first love after so many years even he too married....what you feel.....just feeling love for him is it wrong....nothing other than else..just knowing good and bad things of each others lives...and staying as friends.....is it okay...what do you say...
@EARLZHAN (938)
• Philippines
12 Nov 09
It's not impossible to happen Mel.. Who know your partner is also in-love with someone else.. LOL.. Just Kidding.. I agree with you.. Breakups, divorce and some problems in a relationship commonly starts because of third party.
@happy2512 (1266)
• Philippines
12 Nov 09
Yes it is really possible especially if you are rushing in to a relationship that you are not even sure of your partner regret is always in the end, we always find reason to put our partner down in order for us to have an alibi to be in love with someone else. Just think it trough if you are really sure of your decision for we never can determine how important that person is until they are out of our lives.
• India
12 Nov 09
Yes it is possible and it is happening all the time. It is because you're mistaking lust for love. It is because someone loves parts of your body and you think that person loves "you". It is because its just se*ual desire and you think its a relationship. Object of lust changes frequently and abruptly but object of love never changes. If someone is happy to see you happy, if someone can remain committed and misses you even when you dont see each other, if someone is nice and kind to you even when things are not going right, if someone never abuses, humiliates or intentionally hurts you - then that person loves you and you dont have to worry about a third party.